The Next Star Wars Movie Will Arrive In 2026, And Now We Know What It Is

@patriotman: Why?

@magpietower: I can't imagine they'd go into another Rey movie expecting massive success, not after the response to Rise of Skywalker.

But then I didn't imagine they'd make a movie as bad as Rise of Skywalker in the first place, so maybe all Star Wars bets are off. : p

@sebb: Check out the Edge on junior here…

@azalis: I'm the opposite. Jedi and Sith are becoming more like superheroes as Disney's Star Wars goes on, and there are apparently no rules for what the Force can do (or why it suddenly can't for the sake of creating tension). I've always liked the scum and villainy side of Star Wars most. Jedi and Sith are cool when they're used with moderation and restraint, but I usually get less interested the more involved they are.

@azalis: I agree. Stories about the jedi are the only ones that try to study deeper ideas in the Star Wars universe. They don't always succeed, but I've lost interest in the same western/adventure serials told in space. Mandalorian and all that other stuff isn't for me.

@azalis: This is not the way.

@azalis: IDK, I though Andor was a great story.

@fastesttcar: As of late, I’ve noticed a truly concerning crisis in the United States. An unusual number of poems, novels, movies and even Grammy performances have “set off” people’s “woke” sensitivity syndrome (WSS), otherwise known as DeSantisitus. For some reason the state of Florida has suffered a particularly large outbreak in the last couple of years.

As you likely know too well, the poor sufferers of this disease have the unusual symptom of developing an intolerance for any representation of significant or strong female characters, people of color who aren’t sidekicks to more powerful white characters, any characters who defy patriarchal gender norms/ roles, etc.. They must suffer the chronic condition of only viewing movies or reading stories that mirror their own egotistical sense of self-importance.

While some attempts have been made to surgically remove the cishet white male privilege that has ensnared patients’ cerebral cortex, the outcomes have been less than desirable. Most such surgeries have resulted in patients who now identify as communists, tea drinking sissies, and tofu eating metrosexuals who can no longer properly pronounce “Merica” or successfully belch out the words to the Pledge of Allegiance.

A truly sad fate. If you are concerned about developing a chronic case of Desantinitus (WSS) or have friends or family that are vulnerable to this outbreak, public health professionals recommend canceling broadband internet, all streaming video services, and only watching old John Wayne movies or reruns of The Dukes of Hazard on VHS tape. Also, wearing masks have been proven to only worsen this condition, resulting in full grown men who stamp their feet and cry about mask mandates while simultaneously demanding an end to reproductive health care rights for women.

@fastesttcar: The Mandalorian show has done pretty well for Disney, so if anything was going to be successful as a Star Wars movie, it’s probably this.

And I really doubt Gina Carano is going have much luck with her lawsuit. The first amendment only protects from government obstruction of speech, it doesn’t mean you can’t be fired for saying dumb stuff on social media.

@fastesttcar: That lawsuit is dead on arrival as Disney simply decided not to renew Carano's contract (which is their prerogative) instead of terminating her employment. Nice to see the cringey culture warriors still being triggered about Carano being removed from the show.

@fastesttcar: Exactly.

@judaspete: and thankfully it will never happen. I don't want to see more characters drinking milk from an alien.