Pushing the standard for Video Games...
......What kinda name is Hilary anyways?
Pansy.
Anyways, hai guys. I've been bestowed with the ultimate power of teaching you guys about how awesome this "Assassin's Creed" game is.
Well...it's a pretty nifty game. I'll give you the DL mah nikkas.
Spoiler free as well....
So I can't tell you the entire beginning, but I'll tell you that the twist is really cool...or the concept at least, but yeah, you start off finding out what Jade and Co. has been keeping under wraps story wise, you get a little tutorial, and then you jump into the action.
You're Altair (as I'm sure many of you know) and you're a bad ass. On your first little quest, you and your two Padawan Assassin's are on a retrieval mission, to recover the Ark from Indiana Jones. Well the shit hits the fan when this Frenchie general douchebag shows up with his little crew. Altair's cocky ass is all like "MUST KILL FRENCHIE!!!", so he jumps down and gets destroyed by Frenchie McDoucherson, and gets one of his Padawans killed in the process. Altair escapes to his Assassin HQ, where from thereon, you get bitch slapped by your master, get all of your nifty weapons taken away, your rank stripped away,and all of the other Assassins think you're a dumbass. Now you have to prove yourself to all of the Assassins and gain your rank back, while at the same time, searching for the French asshole, so that you can avenge your Padawans and your name.
In order to regain your old rank as an Assassin, and prove yourself to your Assassin master, you must complete 9 hits for him. These 9 guys are all shit heads, they sell weapons, enslave people, murder innocents, and so on and so forth...So basically, you don't feel bad when you kill them. However, you can't just find these guys and stab them in the face from the get-go, you need to do about four investigations in order to gain enough information to plan your hit. The majority of these investigations are either: eavesdropping, interrogations, pickpocketing, or doing a task for an informant.
Now, I shall give you the skinny on how these investigations on performed:
-Eavesdropping: There's really nothing to it, you just find the marker on your GPS, and sit on a nearby bench, target the two guys you want to listen to, and press a button...not very exciting stuff, but it's nice to get an easy break in your investigation.
-Interrogations: These are quite fun, you go up a town crier guy, and then follow him when he's done. They all lead you to a secluded alleyway and then you get to smack the shit out of him...Then they talk...Altair says the badass equivalent of "Goodbye" and spring blades the fucker.
-Pickpocketing: These are pretty simple as well, the only problem is that the guy that you need to pickpocket can be in guarded areas at times. Basically, you just follow a guy, watching his movements, follow closely behind him, press and hold down the pick pocket button, and steal his note, map, etc.
-Informants: These guys piss me off. They're little pussy assassin's who are all like, "Help me big strong Altair, I'm too much of a little shit to do my hit...do it for me, and I'll tell you some information." So then like ten guards pop up on your GPS, and you have to take them out quietly, without alerting any guards before the time runs out. These are the most annoying of the investigations.
And in order to find out where you can conduct your investigations, you must scout around the city, and find view points, so that you can scan the area...Then you get to do one of those nifty leaps of faith.
You can also find little side thingies. Which are basically just saving citizens from the corrupt guards, by taking all the guards out. Then the citizen will tell you how grateful they are. If they're a guy, you'll get some monks to hide with, if they're a girl, they'll get their..five brothers or uncles or whatever to fight the guards when they're chasing after you. This really comes in handy. Thanks chums.
But yeah, when you finally get to your hit, it's great, the game engages one of it's interactive cinematics, and you watch how evil these guys you're bringing down are..Then after the cut scene you're left to figure out the time to strike. If you want to be slow and calculating, you can do that, if you want to say **** it and run after the guy, a chase will usually occur. These chases are always great, because...you're just finding ways through your parkour to catch up to these dickheads..and when you finally do...it's so great..it's the same animation everytime, but it's beautiful. You tackle the guy, and smash your hidden blade into his head.
Once you get your target, a little cut scene occurs with you and your target in some kind of purgatory, where you basically say "Goodnight sweet child" to your target, and the target makes you questions your actions and your orders. Then, boom. You're out of your purgatory, and back in the city...and the cities on full alert.
RUN BITCH RUN!
Which brings me to my next point. Free running.
Free running, is sex. It's amazing, like, the fact that Jade Raymond put this in the game makes me want to do her even moreso. First off the controls of the free running are great, all you have to do (in the case of the 360) is hold down the right trigger, and the A button, and point the joystick in the direction of the object that you want to look incredible on. You almost want to get chased by the guards, just so you can humiliate them by effortlessly sprinting and jumping, leaping, bounding, from rooftop to rooftop. These moments are truly cinematic..and..incredible.
Now to my next point...The combat. The combat system in the beginning of this game kinda sucks...because you can't really do anything besides block and hit with your sword...But once you rank up, omfg nikka. The way Ubisoft did the combat in this game is like nothing else I've seen before, and it works perfectly with the character and the flow of the game. Basically, if you didn't know already, the combat system is really based off of studying your enemies movements, and making sure your timing is right. And once you master the combat system, you truly feel like a stone cold mother fucker. You'll easily dispatch about fifteen guards, all through a series of counters, grabs, and stepping/dodging. It's great. Now, if you're a button masher, you can do that in this game too...but...you're going to get your ass kicked pretty frequently if you do.
The combat system and the free running are really the ultimate high points of this game, because the thing that makes a game amazing for me, is if it makes you think differently when playing it, and this is what Assassin's Creed does. When free running, you're constantly scanning your environment for things to run up, jump to, or climb up, or hide in. When in combat, as said before, you're analyzing your opponents, and determining the time to strike. You're not only analyzing when you're in combat or free running though, you need to use it when you're walking through the streets, basically watching out for guards, and making sure you aren't doing anything suspicious.
But since I've brought that up, I need to talk about some of my gripes:
As you progress in the game, the guards become more suspicious of you, since your actions become more and more well known. Which is understandable..but very frustrating. I've found myself getting in trouble with the guards for reasons unknown. I'll just be walking down the street and my blinker will suddenly turn red, which is annoying...Because walking across an entire city like a monk takes a very long time, and I'm not that patient. Another annoying thing..Those fucking beggars and town retards/drunks/whatever the **** they are. Annoying as ****. I can't stand it when the cities on high alert, the guards are all searching for me, I'm walking slowly down a corridor, and some bitch beggar runs up
"HALP! HALP! IM HUNGREEEE!!! FEEEEEED MEEEEE!" They block your path and follow in front of you for about two blocks...It really tests your self control..How badly I wanted to stab them Sad
Then there's the drunks, these guys find a way to show up whenever you need to follow someone to pickpocket, assassinate, or interrogate. These anorexic dipshits hobble over to you and smack you around because they're angry that they can't get off the sauce. Then sometimes there's another one nearby, so the two fuckos play ping pong with you, shoving you back and forth. GRRRRR
I would have loved if if they could have toned down those things just a little bit. Because it gets very annoying having guards chase you, just because you're galloping through the kingdom.
Now for my last pro about the game: the story and presentation..
This game's story is awesome, as I said before, the stories concept is really awesome...and when I was craving more Assassin's Creed, I couldn't figure out if it was because I wanted to find out more about the story...or because the game play was so great. I found myself trying to kill my targets as quickly as possible, because I wanted to unravel more of the mystery, and overall story of this game. And the story doesn't disappoint. The story is told through great voice acting, even the citizens don't sound very cheesy. The presentation...yowza. This one of those games, where you stop playing for a minute...and just look at what's going on around you..How lively the city and it's people look..the lights/shadows..and the dusty textures of the environment all make you realize this is like a work of art. Like Bioshock, this is a game that truly immerses you in its world and pushes the standard for video games once again. You didn't disappoint Ubisoft.
9/10
Btw. Kristen Bell....What a babe.