Any other introverts here?

And if so, do you find life generally awkward and find yourself feeling a sense of anxiety quite a lot? I'm pretty sure I'm naturally an introvert, but I think it's developing into some kind of social anxiety disorder. I really like being by myself, not out of fear, just because it feels right to me. But when I'm in college and everyones talking about a party or some kind of social activity, or we are planning a family gathering, I always feel really anxious and I just don't want to be there. I think it could be to do with the fact that introverts are a minority and a lot of people may not understand them, and see them as being selfish.

So I guess the point of this is to ask any other introverts, are you happy? Do you find yourselves feeling a sense of anxiety a lot?

"an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people.

Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to "recharge."

When introverts want to be alone, it is not, by itself, a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts."

I am an introvert. I have also struggled with depression ever since I moved from the South Pacific to the mainland US. So for most of my life things have been this way. The anti-depressants I was given made things worse. The only things that have helped me cope are creating art (in some form or another), exercising, and using marijuana.

depends who im with

I am sometimes, but I prefer being with someone most of the time.

And if so, do you find life generally awkward and find yourself feeling a sense of anxiety quite a lot? I'm pretty sure I'm naturally an introvert, but I think it's developing into some kind of social anxiety disorder. I really like being by myself, not out of fear, just because it feels right to me. But when I'm in college and everyones talking about a party or some kind of social activity, or we are planning a family gathering, I always feel really anxious and I just don't want to be there. I think it could be to do with the fact that introverts are a minority and a lot of people may not understand them, and see them as being selfish.

So I guess the point of this is to ask any other introverts, are you happy? Do you find yourselves feeling a sense of anxiety a lot?

"an introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people.

Introverts are more concerned with the inner world of the mind. They enjoy thinking, exploring their thoughts and feelings. They often avoid social situations because being around people drains their energy. This is true even if they have good social skills. After being with people for any length of time, such as at a party, they need time alone to "recharge."

When introverts want to be alone, it is not, by itself, a sign of depression. It means that they either need to regain their energy from being around people or that they simply want the time to be with their own thoughts."

The_89

yes, I am definately an introvert as I value my alone time far more than time spent with others.

However, if I do not go out and socialize, meet new people, etc I tend to feel like a loser. I have to go out one time a week or so with friends, and I enjoy talking to strangers at my job.

that whole part about "being alone to recharge" definately applies in my case.

I hate how people think introverts are sad or depressed.

its funny, though...most people I know complain about how much they hate their life. I cant help but talk about how great mine is.

Is there some statistic out there showing the introverts and cynics/pessimists or something, or do people just assume the worst concerning quiet people?

Interesting. I'm trying to find out if it's normal for an introvert to feel anxious around people. I enjoy my own space, I'm happy when I'm alone and I consider myself a friendly person, but when I'm around people I feel anxious because I'm assuming peoplethink I feel anxious... if that makes any sense.

I hate how people think introverts are sad or depressed.

its funny, though...most people I know complain about how much they hate their life. I cant help but talk about how great mine is.

Is there some statistic out there showing the introverts and cynics/pessimists or something, or do people just assume the worst concerning quiet people?

mrbojangles25

if we wanted, we could pair this thread's results with this thread's.

I am an introvert as well. INFJ, to be exact. I do not feel anxiety, atleast I dont think I do. I do hate being around people I dont know that well though. Parties do not appeal to me at all. I usually dont mind family gatherings, it's usually not that much work to be around them. And while I do like my alone time, I do enjoy just as much being around my friends. I feel that is very important.

As an aside, where do people get all these guesses from? Most of OT is introvert? Where do people get that assumption?

I don't talk as much as I should be in parties and I sometimes get overwhelmed by large group gatherings

I think there is a certain aspect of romanticism in relation to solitude and the mysterious

I spend a lot of time thinking and I think a lot before acting/speaking

[QUOTE="mrbojangles25"]

I hate how people think introverts are sad or depressed.

its funny, though...most people I know complain about how much they hate their life. I cant help but talk about how great mine is.

Is there some statistic out there showing the introverts and cynics/pessimists or something, or do people just assume the worst concerning quiet people?

Dman0017

if we wanted, we could pair this thread's results with this thread's.

haha i just came from there, I agree the results would be interesting. Get on that, report back ASAP!

To a certain extent, I am, but I really need others: everything I think about needs to be communicated to others in order to find out if what I've thought about works outside of my mind.

Actualy TC you described me perfectly in that paragraph..

I like to be left alone, unless its my girlfriend, I only let her into my little world. I sit around and just think alot. During lunch I can only be social with a big group, whenever i'm alone with one other person (like I was today) I feel alot of anxiety and want to get out of there and just hope to god he/she doesnt talk to me.

So yeah, I have alot of anxiety, but i'am fairly happy being with my girlfriend. Without her I wouldnt feel right in my life really.

I am an introvert. I am pretty much satisfied about everything in my life with the exception of relationships with women (no surprise there).

I usually have a positive, joking attitude when I'm with other people. I'm rarely anxious around people. My only weakness is that I can't approach people easily, in fact it can seem downright impossible.

Interesting. I'm trying to find out if it's normal for an introvert to feel anxious around people. I enjoy my own space, I'm happy when I'm alone and I consider myself a friendly person, but when I'm around people I feel anxious because I'm assuming peoplethink I feel anxious... if that makes any sense.

The_89

I feel anxious, but not in a debilitating way. Furthermore, I need a "warmup" phase...I work at a job, and part of my duties is customer service and stuff. The first couple customers I tend to mumble, stutter, and do bad things like that. But pretty soon I am speaking in a loud and clear voice, making eye contact, and all that stuff.

Concerning social events, I require a little bit of peer pressure. My initial reply to "Hey want to go to a party?" is generally "no, I think I am just gonna chill tonight" but with a little positive pressure I tend to go and end up having a good time. I wouldn't say I fear meeting new people, I am just intimidated by it. I get over this by generally not really giving a damn, and sort of not having control over what I say; if they like me, great, if not...'twas not meant to be.

And yes, I know exactly what you mean about people thinking you are anxious lol. I feel introverts are, by nature, a bit more self-conscious than others simply because they need to make the most of what little social interaction they partake in.

I'm an introvert. I like to be alone most of the time, and I day dream and introspect a lot. There are few people I "want" in my life, hence why I like to be alone (not that I hate anyone, as least as of now).

That's me, exactly. I've been like this pretty much all my life. Also I feel like my mind somewhat shuts down when people are around. I deffinitley think I have a social anxiety disorder, I even get all nervous about going downtown to get a coffee or some pizza pops, etc. Haha. I don't want to be like this forever but I have a feeling I don't really have a choice. I tried becoming an outgoing socialite "party person", I moved to my old town and lived with my friend. I hung out with really social people, partied, got drunk, smoked weed, everyday. I eventually realized that lifestyle was empty as hell. So much more superficial and pointless than when I was alone most of the time. So basically, forums are how I socialize now xD I know it's lame but whatever. EDIT: I know this sounds morbid, but I'm glad you are like me. Heh, I'm glad there are other people out there who feel just like this. I've struggled with depression for most of my latter part of life... Good to not be 100% alone on this. Sometimes I feel like I'm crazy too :(mike_me

I know exactly what you mean. I've actually seen my GP about this and she's recommended me to see a psychiatrist, which has just made me feel even more crazy :P deep down I know we are not crazy, we're just different and we want other people to accept it before we can accept it ourselves. Sucks, but through self-help I hope to learn how to simply not care, and just be happy the way I am

i'm an extreme introvert.

I went to a concert once and my friends got pissed cause they didnt think I was having fun (cause I wasnt jumping around or screaming or anything crazy) but my definition of ''fun'' was just standing there listening to the music, the music is what we came for right? I honestly dont understand out going people sometimes, I enjoy things a difforent way than they do and they think i'm heathen for it or something

I am an introverted extrovert...

I am reallygood in social situations, excellent at reading people, socially adept, but I prefer being alone
-don't really like very many people

(or would that make me an extroverted introvert)

I went to a concert once and my friends got pissed cause they didnt think I was having fun (cause I wasnt jumping around or screaming or anything crazy) but my definition of ''fun'' was just standing there listening to the music, the music is what we came for right? I honestly dont understand out going people sometimes, I enjoy things a difforent way than they do and they think i'm heathen for it or something

Xorital

[QUOTE="Xorital"]

I went to a concert once and my friends got pissed cause they didnt think I was having fun (cause I wasnt jumping around or screaming or anything crazy) but my definition of ''fun'' was just standing there listening to the music, the music is what we came for right? I honestly dont understand out going people sometimes, I enjoy things a difforent way than they do and they think i'm heathen for it or something

ghoklebutter

yes that would be me, needless to say i'm not invited to hang out much xD

I went to a concert once and my friends got pissed cause they didnt think I was having fun (cause I wasnt jumping around or screaming or anything crazy) but my definition of ''fun'' was just standing there listening to the music, the music is what we came for right? I honestly dont understand out going people sometimes, I enjoy things a difforent way than they do and they think i'm heathen for it or something

Xorital

rofl. This reminds me of a time I was sitting on a stool on the balcony overlooking the stage drinking a beer at a metal concert. My friend was downstairs in the pit and would come up once in a while and ask me if I was having a good time "because it doesn't look like it". I was having a great time, listening to the music instead of getting bruised and trampled :P

I feel anxious, but not in a debilitating way. Furthermore, I need a "warmup" phase...I work at a job, and part of my duties is customer service and stuff. The first couple customers I tend to mumble, stutter, and do bad things like that. But pretty soon I am speaking in a loud and clear voice, making eye contact, and all that stuff.

Concerning social events, I require a little bit of peer pressure. My initial reply to "Hey want to go to a party?" is generally "no, I think I am just gonna chill tonight" but with a little positive pressure I tend to go and end up having a good time. I wouldn't say I fear meeting new people, I am just intimidated by it. I get over this by generally not really giving a damn, and sort of not having control over what I say; if they like me, great, if not...'twas not meant to be.

And yes, I know exactly what you mean about people thinking you are anxious lol. I feel introverts are, by nature, a bit more self-conscious than others simply because they need to make the most of what little social interaction they partake in.

mrbojangles25

I'm the same when people ask me to go to parties and stuff, I just say no without even thinking about it. For me, I just have no interest. It's like "Do you want to come to this party?" then I say "Nah, not really..." and then I activate my mind-reading powers which drives me into a state of self-consciousness and anxiety. I start thinking about whatthey are thinking. I feel like they are thinking "Pfft, why doesn't he want to hang out with his own friends? Maybe he doesn't really like me, that or he's just selfish" when in actual fact it's simply because going to parties, concerts, whatever - zero interest. Sure, I have interest doing what I enjoy with my friends for a short while, because I do care about my friends and family, I just don't have the same social needs as most people I know.

I am an introverted extrovert...

I am reallygood in social situations, excellent at reading people, socially adept, but I prefer being alone
-don't really like very many people

(or would that make me an extroverted introvert)

rawsavon

I went to a concert once and my friends got pissed cause they didnt think I was having fun (cause I wasnt jumping around or screaming or anything crazy) but my definition of ''fun'' was just standing there listening to the music, the music is what we came for right? I honestly dont understand out going people sometimes, I enjoy things a difforent way than they do and they think i'm heathen for it or something

Xorital

I have OCD and social anxiety, so I am naturally introverted and loathe any sort of public involvement that would require me to make decisions.

[QUOTE="rawsavon"]

I am an introverted extrovert...

I am reallygood in social situations, excellent at reading people, socially adept, but I prefer being alone
-don't really like very many people

(or would that make me an extroverted introvert)

Dman0017

Sounds very similar...able and willing (depending on the circumstance)
-but really enjoy 'me' time

Both my girlfiend and I are introverts. We rarely go anywhere, at times its rather boring but hey thats just us lol.

I am an introverted extrovert...

I am reallygood in social situations, excellent at reading people, socially adept, but I prefer being alone
-don't really like very many people

(or would that make me an extroverted introvert)

rawsavon

this is me in a nutshell, though I would call myself an extroverted introvert.

I tend to read people too well, they get offended when I call them on their true motivations or tell them theyre full of bullcrap.

Both my girlfiend and I are introverts. We rarely go anywhere, at times its rather boring but hey thats just us lol.

Crimtmp

My girlfriend says that she loves dating introverts cause they have so much to talk about. Which is oddley true, I always have something to talk about since i'm usually just sitting around thinking about random things and listening to other people talk. Granted shes only dated me so I guess shes generalizing all introverts by how I act, I don't really know any others but myself, so I go with it I guess.

I never feel I have loads to talk about, I guess I have a lot of opinions about my own little crazy universe but most people think a little too normal to keep on track with me :P. I do enjoy listening to people though, and get pleasure out of helping people through their problems when I can. I guess I'm the type who wont usually start a conversation, but will listen deeply into one, and will chip in with a point of view every now and then

I don't think I'm an introvert. If I'm alone, by myself, or not with other people for an extended period of time, I'll tend to call myself crazy and try to get outside of the house somehow and meet up with other people. I can't stand the feeling of being alone in this world.
I'm pretty good in social situations. When I'm with groups of people (Especially if I'm very comfortable around these people), that's when I tend to be most energetic because I just enjoy having people around me and getting to share laughs and other experiences like that together.
Now I am not a full-blown extrovert. You may see me as a quiet guy at times -- but I would in no way say I'm introverted.

Introvert? Maybe. I don't really like spending time with people my age and high school and college have been horrifying experiences for me so far. But I wouldn't really call me a true introvert. I am talking to people all the time, don't tell me people online don't count, because the fact is without any sort of human communication anyone could go insane. So I guess you could call me an introvert and a misanthrope, but I definitely don't hate people, I just don't really trust anyone anymore because I have almost always gotten made fun of for my opinions and life views, so I tend to keep a very low profile. Could develop into paranoid personality disorder if I keep this up, but I can't really find anything in common with anyone I meet. I feel much more comfortable among adults.

[QUOTE="Crimtmp"]

Both my girlfiend and I are introverts. We rarely go anywhere, at times its rather boring but hey thats just us lol.

Xorital

My girlfriend says that she loves dating introverts cause they have so much to talk about. Which is oddley true, I always have something to talk about since i'm usually just sitting around thinking about random things and listening to other people talk. Granted shes only dated me so I guess shes generalizing all introverts by how I act, I don't really know any others but myself, so I go with it I guess.

Yeah right. Every girl I have ever known always start small talk. I loathe small talk.

When I am truly having an enjoyable discussion it is about philosphy, psychology, politics, economics, ethics, science, the human condition, automobile mechanics, computers (programming and hardware), and occasionally music. Unfortunately these are not exactly first date (I loathe dating too btw) discussion topics... I usually end up offending people because I hold radical views and tend to challenge other people's views.

[QUOTE="Xorital"]

[QUOTE="Crimtmp"]

Both my girlfiend and I are introverts. We rarely go anywhere, at times its rather boring but hey thats just us lol.

Tezcatlipoca666

My girlfriend says that she loves dating introverts cause they have so much to talk about. Which is oddley true, I always have something to talk about since i'm usually just sitting around thinking about random things and listening to other people talk. Granted shes only dated me so I guess shes generalizing all introverts by how I act, I don't really know any others but myself, so I go with it I guess.

Yeah right. Every girl I have ever known always start small talk. I loathe small talk.

When I am truly having an enjoyable discussing it is about philosphy, psychology, politics, economics, ethics, science, the human condition, automobile mechanics, computers (programming and hardware), and occasionally music. Unfortunately these are not exactly first date (I loathe dating too btw) discussion topics... I usually end up offending people because I hold radical views and tend to challenge other people's views.

we are simular my friend, just throw video games in there too. Though she enjoys what I have to say, for the most part we share veiws. I too have very controversal veiws and I greatly offend my family and some people by having them.

I'm pretty sure I'm one of the happiest persons i know. I would imagine that dealing with it in the best manner possible helped a lot.

What is hard is dealing and being exact enough so that explaining why i don't want to go to parties, or why i can't go on vacations with 20 different people for a week won't hurt anyone's feelongs. Also, finding time for yourself can be pretty hard when out with friends, if there isn't any bathroom around.

Nevertheless, i always made an effort not to subject to other's misunderstanding, or their inability, or their lack of desire to understand.

I'm pretty sure I'm one of the happiest persons i know. I would imagine that dealing with it in the best manner possible helped a lot.

What is hard is dealing and being exact enough so that explaining why i don't want to go to parties, or why i can't go on vacations with 20 different people for a week won't hurt anyone's feelongs. Also, finding time for yourself can be pretty hard when out with friends, if there isn't any bathroom around.

Nevertheless, i always made an effort not to subject to other's misunderstanding, or their inability, or their lack of desire to understand.

joao_22990

I find it really hard not to subject myself to others misunderstanding. Really hard. Recently it was my cousins 21st birthday and she invited everyone, I didn't go because parties just really aren't for me. It'd be like if I asked her to play video games with me and not leave the room for a day -- she'd hate that. It's not like I didn't care it was her birthday or anything, but I'm sure that's how it comes off to other people. So through the years of me missing family gatherings and turning down invites to social activities with friends, I get the impression everyone thinks of me in the same way: the selfish anti-social one who doesn't care about anyone else but himself. I know it's not true, but they don't, so now I've just become really self-conscious

[QUOTE="Xorital"]

[QUOTE="Crimtmp"]

Both my girlfiend and I are introverts. We rarely go anywhere, at times its rather boring but hey thats just us lol.

Tezcatlipoca666

My girlfriend says that she loves dating introverts cause they have so much to talk about. Which is oddley true, I always have something to talk about since i'm usually just sitting around thinking about random things and listening to other people talk. Granted shes only dated me so I guess shes generalizing all introverts by how I act, I don't really know any others but myself, so I go with it I guess.

Yeah right. Every girl I have ever known always start small talk. I loathe small talk.

When I am truly having an enjoyable discussion it is about philosphy, psychology, politics, economics, ethics, science, the human condition, automobile mechanics, computers (programming and hardware), and occasionally music. Unfortunately these are not exactly first date (I loathe dating too btw) discussion topics... I usually end up offending people because I hold radical views and tend to challenge other people's views.

yeah people think of me the same way I think. When me and my gf first started dating, I stayed over at her house and her mom thought I was very rude cause I wouldnt talk to her or even thank her for letting me stay, it isnt even that. I'm just very anxious about approching people.