Anyone in your family an ass?

We all have that family member who makes the rest of us look bad. Who's yours?

For me it's my brother. He's a year younger than me (he's 36), has never moved out of our parents house, drinks vodka straight from the moment he wakes and mouths off to anyone he has the opportunity to.

He's quite funny and intelligent, he's just got that damn attitude. There's been times we've gone out to eat I just wanted to crawl under the table because he's so damn rude to the waitresses. "I said mayonnaise only, what the **** is this lettuce on here? Take it back and make it over, a new one. I ain't eating this shit and you ain't getting a tip, either."

Just today he decided he wanted to play Dragon Age again, which is the only game he has on his Steam account. Only problem: new PC. Steamguard. No problem, just check your E-mail and clear it, right? Well, he only ever used that E-mail address for registering Steam and then never used it again, so it expired.

Whose fault is it? Apparently, Valves. He spent a half-hour composing a profanity-filled support ticket that's more likely to get a ban than assistance.

Hell, I live 30 minutes away, and guess who does all the yard work and stable work at my parents house as my father is a bit too old these days?

I can't disassociate because he's the only brother I have, but holy shit sometimes I just want to punch him in the face, five or six times, really hard.

How do you deal with these people in your family? Because I'm at a loss here. He's such an asshole and he has no reason to be.

Well....I had an answer.....but that description of your brother just blew my answer out of the park.

So.....yeah....

Almost my entire paternal side of the family. I'm not going to go into detail, but it's far worse than your brother.

Sorry to hear that. It sucks when your own blood has such obvious deficiencies.

My father.

Nothing like that. My family members usually only act like asses towards each other, when we're in public we put on a good veneer. Sometimes they say some pretty rude things that people overhear, like my Grandma once said something pretty rude about our waitress' accent while she was still in earshot, but they're usually nice to people's faces. As for work ethic and such, my family's all sanctimonious and industrious, I'm kind of the blacksheep in that regard. Not that I lay around and drink all day, but I'm a bit more laid-back and easy-going, it's a pretty stark contrast. My dad goes stir-crazy on the weekends, and I could sit around and read, write, and play guitar all day for most of the week.

Can' say that I have anyone in my family who is an ass. I've got a couple of cousins who curse so much on facebook that I won't friend them, but they live in Jersey and I'm in Indiana so I can't say I ever have to deal with them in person.

I suppose the worst I've got in my more immediate family is my aunt who more or less refuses to do anything on her own, but that's only outside of work. When she's at work she's apparently a very hardworking attentive individual, I just wish we could see some of that in her social life.

Same here! What's your Dad's story?

For me, my father actually just got release from prison after spending a good 10 years behind bars. He apparently pulled a crossbow on an officer and had cocaine on him, all while on parole for ANOTHER offense that I am still unsure how guilty he was there, but still....

He is narcissistic as hell and can't take blame for his actions. It took him YEARS of blaming the family for his going to prison before he is now FINALLY admitting fault, but even then I still see his "it is never me" attitude coming through....

I am embarrassed as hell to be his son quite frankly. He is one of only two people in his family (the other being one of his brothers...) who have been total ****-ups. Everyone else has done incredible for themselves besides him and his one brother...

My sister is just a total cvnt. When I was young she got involved in a real bad crowd, hard drugs etc. She then put my family through a couple years of hell trying to get social services to give her custody of me so she could get support cheques. She also got involved with a guy who got out on parole after pushing a girl out of a third floor window. He threw me in a river and almost killed me cause I was annoying him. Now some 14 years later she's got kids she always tries to dump on us so she can go get drunk and she's constantly shouted out me and my parents for not doing enough for her. The worst thing I think was that my grandparents gave her 40k to get back on her feet, but she blew it all in about a month to pay off her shitty boyfriends debts and go boozing like never before, so shes got jack to show for it.

My dad is an ass. He's actually the worst one in our family when it comes to this, but at least he mostly just treats family members like $hit. So that's not too bad, I guess. I can still introduce my friends to him and be reasonably confident that he won't treat THEM like shit.

And i guess it's not even that unfair to say that he treats family like shit. I guess he's been more than fair in most regards, it's just that he TALKS to people as if they're shit. And that generally just happens if anyone gives him the slightest disagreement or criticism. He';s just one of those people with a hugely inflated ego that he didn't earn. It's like his entire selnse of well-being revolves around believing that he's so smart and always right. So any time you disagree with him or criticize him in even the slightest way, he takes it as a huge personal attack and blows up over it. Arguing and yelling and whatnot. Basically he's like a real life version of some of the most obnoxious internet posters. Pretty much a case of "all bark, no bite", so he's pretty harmless overall.

Still, harmless or not, I don't have time for that shit. I've learned to just plain not talk to the guy except for in a superficial capacity. Then he gets his feelings hurt because no one really talks to him and I'm just thinking, "that's sad, but tough shit." He's kind of a lonely dude, and I kind of feel bad for him, but not my problem. I hate to say it, but many lonely people are lonely for a good freaking reason.

My brother is a lot the same, just to a slightly lesser extent.

My sister can kind of be an ass too, but she's an ass in a different way. My brother and father really don't know how to talk to people, they're kind of TRASHY. My sister, on the other hand, is just kind of SNOBBY. She won't yell at you or be mean to you, but she can often have this annoying way of talking to you as if she's better than you.

My mother is probably most like my sister in this rregard, just not to the same extent. I think my mother's problem isn't that she's an ass. My mother's problem is that she can sometimes just be sort of ANNOYING. Like, she'll just talk and talk and talk. And I'm not even talking about actual conversation. She'll have something really simple to say, like "the weather is bad" or "I need some ideas for Vhristmas presents for the rest of the family", but she takes forever just getting to the point and has to make a story or something to go along with everything. I can spend 20 minutes listening to her talk and talk and talk, then the whole thing just results in some mundane little thing that she could have just come right out and said. Seriously, just get to the freaking point!

I'm tempted to say, "sure you can", but then that'd mean disassociating from your parents too and that wouldn't be right to them.

Anyway, I think that family is important, but I'm not one of those people who believes in NEVER abandoning family. The fact is that we all also have to take care of OURSELVES, and there comes a point where family needs to get cut if they're standing in the way of our own progress. Like, I've known worthless drug addicts who were living with their parents and taking advantage of them, and the parents just kept letting it happen because "we won't abandon family." I kind of say screw that. They tried to help the guy multiple times, they truly did, it's gotten to the point where what they SHOULD do is just kick the guy out and stop letting him drag them down.

Granted, I think it should take a lot to COMPLETELY disassociate from family. But I'm fine with disassociating with them in certain issues. As in, if my family member treated strangers like crap, then I'd refuse to associate him IN PUBLIC. It's not the end of the world. I can still come visit or talk to him on the phone. But I won't be seen with him in public, because he treats people like shit and that makes ME look bad.

Mine probably doesn't even compare to yours, but he's a very irate person. Easily angered, short tempered, and excessively rude. Partner all that with his heavy drinking habits and drug use, it's gotten him into a lot trouble over his life, along with the occasional jail time.

My mom is like that. She's got to tell you every little detail before making the point. And to make matters worse, she'll drop what she's saying in the middle of the sentence, start on something completely different, and then pick up the original topic where we started at.

She's also really bad about starting off with pronouns without defining them first.

Yeah that's pretty much what it's come down to. I'll visit when I'm at my parents house, but I'll find every excuse in the world not to go anywhere with him.

People piss me off sometimes, and if they're doing it intentionally I'll make an issue of it. However, simple mistakes I can overlook...we all get in a hurry and have things on our minds at times and I understand that. I even understand having a bad day. But to just go off on people simply because you can...I'm not going to be a party to that.

I don't wanna poke into your life, but maybe you should reduce it with your brother, if you don't wanna dissociate totally.Your bro is a jerk-off, no offense meant.

About the waitress, even if it's been long since that day, you should go back to the restaurant and apologize to her on your brother's behalf.I bet she remembers your brother.The poor girl hadn't done anything to deserve that.

Not one opie.

My cousin Jared is to me.

We were best friends growing up and were practically inseparable. When we became sophomores we both got to start for the HS baseball team.

Jared decided he would just hang out with the older teammates while I usually just hung out with people my age.

He didn't even talk to me or associate himself with me at all. To this day (12 years later) he still wont even look me in the eye.

It's really awkward at family get-togethers so I try to avoid him all together.

He is a bit socially awkward from some reason unknown, really has no reason to be.

To this day I don't know why he just me cut me out and off. I really don't care anymore but I just never understood it.

I have this sister...it would be liberating if she would just disappear from our life.

I don't see anything wrong with your brother still living with your parents, if he's unmarried and doesn't have a job that would require him to move away it doesn't make much sense for him to pay for a house or apartment of his own and be lonely living by himself. Though he should help you're parents with house and yardwork and also help them pay household bills (mortgage, electricity, etc.).

Everyone in my family has a tough personality and we're all asses sometimes.

My eldest brother is more or less just like yours. He is also 36(going on 37)

By the sound of it, they could be best friends. Only thing is, my brother saves his drinking for when his shift at work is over...which it then starts immediately, and he is more condescending and obnoxious. He's also a sociopath. My other brother found a test to determine it. Multiple people in the house did the test, including our mother. We all came up with positive lol. Too many details to list. It makes my head spin just thinking about it. I don't mind drinkers. I could be considered a drinker myself. It's how you handle yourself.

In the end though...he's my brother.

Wow, I came here fully prepared to win this by saying that everybody in my family (except my sister...she grew out of it) were asses but you guys are making it hard...still, let me bring my A game...

My father: Since I was really sick as a kid he used to tell me that because I was sick I had ruined his life and marriage and he wish I was dead...also he refused to take me to the hospital when I needed (probably hoping he'd get rid of me)

My mother: Pretended to have cancer so I wouldn't leave the house.

My sister: Beat the crap out of me every time she was frustrated with something.

Think that's f'ed up enough to make the list...

I have a few cousins who are convicted felons, to include one who I used to babysit when he was younger that is serving six years. I'm just glad they aren't immediate family members or they would make it a hell of a lot harder for me to keep my security clearance.

Oh, I took care of that well before we left.

@br0kenrabbit: That's nice of you =)

Most of mine are. =P

Assicrombie?

:P

Not really.

God, yes. Even moreso than me.

My parents are. I'm on the verge of cutting any and all communications with them.

They only call or want to talk when they need money, borrowing money and never paying it back. Any time I call they always seem to be busy and conversations rarely last more than a few minutes. They've repeatedly put stuff in my name and tried to use my credit due to trashing theirs. I've always managed to catch them but I'll never press any kind of charges. I'd feel terrible. They treat waiters and others employed in such services awful over the smallest things. Drama always seems to follow them wherever they work and they judge others incredibly harshly. They treated me like shit throughout high school, were emotionally abusive and were absolute control freaks. Before I moved out after graduating high school they broke down and apologized many times for how they used to take their stress out on me (their words, not mine) but it's hard to forget. They adopted me when I was 6 and put me into a great home and provided for me but over the years as the stress and the debt piled on they transformed from two of the most wonderful people I ever knew to monsters under the skin.

not mine either

I think a better question for me is, is there anyone who isn't an ass in my family.

Not really, no. I love my mom's side of the family and have distanced myself from my father's side for various reasons, but I wouldn't classify any of them as an ass.

Got lucky I guess.

EDIT: On second thought I do have a couple of step-cousins on my mom's side that are convicted felons. One I gave an old car to years ago and he sold it for drugs. The other one has served time for burglary, beating up and robbing the elderly, and domestic abuse. He's got 5 kids too. Why do stupid people always breed more?

TBH he's not that bad a guy and I hope he stays out of jail. I have little to do with them.

I used to be the ass of my immediate family. But I've changed into a better person now. Just ask them!

However, if you look at my dad's side of the family, with the exception of his closest brother that we see regularly and his two younger sisters, his other 9 siblings are asses. Some are completely vile and wicked people.

Sometimes just punching them straight in the face solves things.

The vast majority of my family are asses. Especially my brother, the guy basically hates me because I'm successful and he isn't. He has been in jail quite a few times and whenever he gets back on his feet he starts stealing and ruining everything he gets a chance to.

Nope. They're all human beings. Their ass is just part of their body. :P

My dad gets like that sometimes and it is EXTREMELY annoying and embarrassing.. I totally feel you. It's just sometimes he really is cool and loving guy, but the shortest temper of all time award goes to him. It's a shame. Gotta love him, though.

Yeah... this. The things I would do to him if I saw him now.

giggidy

He should move out simply because my parents want him to. They expected to have the place to themselves 18 years ago, and he hasn't left.

My mom is too nice to kick him to the curb, but she's quite vocal on the fact that he needs to be out of their house and keeping himself up. He knows she won't evict him so he just turns a deaf ear to it.

No one in my family are really asses. The closest ass in my family would be me because I drink too much. I never start any fights or anything, but it would be annoying to watch over the drunk guy to make sure he doesn't hurt him self. I have knocked myself out cold a couple times and fell down a flight of stairs at least twice that I know of. Then they get worried about me because I suffer through alcohol withdrawal and hallucinate and stuff like that.