Basist / Drummer / Guitarist Jokes

I enjoy these kind of jokes

im a guitarist and i have noticed ther isnt really any guitarist jokes (i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) )

if u have any jokes just leave a comment xD

1) How do you know when your a baisist?

a.Your ugly

b.You can hold ur instrument by the strings without the fear of them breaking

c.Your little finger is stronger than your whole arm

2) How do you confuse a basist?

a. Detune a string but dont tell him wich one

3) A drummer decides to learn a new instrument.. goes to the instrument shop and says "Hey can i get that RED Trumpet and Acordian please?" The shop keeper says " Sure u can take the fire extinguisher but the radiator has to stay"

4) whats black and blue an lays in a ditch?

a guitarist who's said to many basist and drummer jokes

=]

(i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) )

War_Munger

WTF?

So two musicians and a drummer walk into a bar...

So two musicians and a drummer walk into a bar...

jakecufc8888

Love it. But I'm a drummer, so be careful, or you might be the guitarist/bassist that is blue and in a ditch for telling too many drummer jokes :P

How do you know when you are a bassist?
You could play your instrument better than anyone else but you would still get no recognition!

LMAO twas funny

oh yh the mirror thing... twas a joke

LMAO twas funny

oh yh the mirror thing... twas a joke

War_Munger

:cry: So no video then?

How do you know when the stage is level?

There is drool coming out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.

:cry: So no video then?

jakecufc8888

I'm sure he will add one to YouTube ;) I will get him to add one anyway :P

1) How do you know when your a baisist?

a.Your ugly

Shes hot. If that kind of makeup is not ur thing ...but it is mine.

There's something wrong with the bass! I can hear it!Vfanek

LMAO classic!

haha, these are good

Ahah makes my bassist life crash down :(

Whatever.

1) How do you know your a bassist?

a. You seriously cannot sing

heheheh

How do you know when you are a bassist?
You could play your instrument better than anyone else but you would still get no recognition!

DannyDelorian

QFT. Aint nothing wrong with the bass. I will take my bass over any guitar ever. I cant stand playing with a pick, there are too many strings and the frets are tiny. And the bass is just as versatile as your regular guitar.

How do you know when the stage is level?

There is drool coming out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.

needled24-7

Awww... I was going to say that one.. Lol.. Oh well. I have another...

Who do drummers hang out with?

Musicians.

hahaha.... I'm a drummer myself.. I like the drummer jokes.... :P

How do you get a bass player off your doorstep?

Pay for the pizza.

What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?
"Hey guys, why don't we try one of my songs?"

What did the drummer say before he was kicked out of the band?

"Hey guys I have this new song I just wrote"

1) How do you know when your a baisist?

a.Your ugly

Shes hot. If that kind of makeup is not ur thing ...but it is mine.

AtrumRegina

What band?

Lmao these are all awsome..

thanks dudes

keep em coming xD

[QUOTE="War_Munger"]

(i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) )

jakecufc8888

WTF?

:lol:... When I read that I literally burst out laughing... and got spit all over my computer screen. :?

What's the difference between a guitar and a jellyfish?

.

.

.

.

.

You can't strum a jellyfish! :lol:

[QUOTE="War_Munger"]

(i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) )

jakecufc8888

WTF?

I noticed that too

I play drums, bass and a little guitar...

Q. How do you know a guitar player is at your door?

A. The knock speeds up, slows down and then speeds up again.

Q. How do you get a musician off your porch?

A. Pay them for the pizza.

This one is a little off track but whatever...

Q. What do a cup of coffee and Eric Clapton have in common?

A. Both suck without Cream.

[QUOTE="DannyDelorian"]

How do you know when you are a bassist?
You could play your instrument better than anyone else but you would still get no recognition!

freek666

QFT. Aint nothing wrong with the bass. I will take my bass over any guitar ever. I cant stand playing with a pick, there are too many strings and the frets are tiny. And the bass is just as versatile as your regular guitar.

The idea of that joke is that the bassists are rarely spoken of.

wow found these on the web,

i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) War_Munger

wow found these on the web,

What did the drummer get on his IQ test? Drool. Did you hear about the time the bass player locked his keys in the car? It took two hours to get the drummer out.How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Give him some sheet music. How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb? Twelve. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it better. How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb? None--they just steal somebody else's light.rgd187

Brilliant. Im loving the lead guitarist one.

Q. How do you know it's a singer at the door?

A.He doesn't know when to come in.

A young boy and his mother are walking down the street and the boy turns to his mother and says "when I grow up I want to be a musician" his mother replies "Now now son you cant do both"!

Q. How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

A.It doesn't matter - bass players are never in the light anyway.

Q.What do you call a person who hangs out with musicians?

A.A drummer.

Q.What is the first sign you're Halluncinating?

A. Two electric guitar players are playing in tune.

http://www.acousticfinger****com/jokes.htm

edit

S tyle is the missing word in the link.

What do you call a frustrated Guitarist?

A bassist

What do you call a frustrated drummer?

A bassist.

What do you call a frustrated bassist?

Talentless. :P

[QUOTE="AtrumRegina"]

1) How do you know when your a baisist?

a.Your ugly

Shes hot. If that kind of makeup is not ur thing ...but it is mine.

Juggernaut140

What band?

Chthonic

[QUOTE="freek666"][QUOTE="DannyDelorian"]

How do you know when you are a bassist?
You could play your instrument better than anyone else but you would still get no recognition!

DannyDelorian

QFT. Aint nothing wrong with the bass. I will take my bass over any guitar ever. I cant stand playing with a pick, there are too many strings and the frets are tiny. And the bass is just as versatile as your regular guitar.

The idea of that joke is that the bassists are rarely spoken of.

Oh I get it. And its true. We aren't really spoken off and we could have just as much talent as the lead guitarist but we're usually restricted to playing in the background with really simple bass lines. Also bassists are always seen as the guys who aren't good enough to play bass or drums, so they play bass. I chose bass because all of my friends either wanted to play guitar or drums, and I love its deep sound. But yeah good jokes. So very true.

What do you call a frustrated Guitarist?

A bassist

What do you call a frustrated drummer?

A bassist.

What do you call a frustrated bassist?

Talentless. :P

Clampdown79

Anywho even though I am a drummer, this is my fave one:

Q - Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car?

A - So they can park in the handicapped spot.

Oh I get it. And its true. We aren't really spoken off and we could have just as much talent as the lead guitarist but we're usually restricted to playing in the background with really simple bass lines. Also bassists are always seen as the guys who aren't good enough to play bass or drums, so they play bass. I chose bass because all of my friends either wanted to play guitar or drums, and I love its deep sound. But yeah good jokes. So very true.freek666

One of my best mates, Lee, is a bassist, and he is pretty good at it. He plays a lot of slap bass as well.

Q - Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car?

A - So they can park in the handicapped spot.

aussie_rocks

I lol'd. I drum as well by the way ;)

Edit: Here is the link of my friend, Lee, on bass http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1alkkEFQHY

[QUOTE="DannyDelorian"][QUOTE="freek666"][QUOTE="DannyDelorian"]

How do you know when you are a bassist?
You could play your instrument better than anyone else but you would still get no recognition!

freek666

QFT. Aint nothing wrong with the bass. I will take my bass over any guitar ever. I cant stand playing with a pick, there are too many strings and the frets are tiny. And the bass is just as versatile as your regular guitar.

The idea of that joke is that the bassists are rarely spoken of.

Oh I get it. And its true. We aren't really spoken off and we could have just as much talent as the lead guitarist but we're usually restricted to playing in the background with really simple bass lines. Also bassists are always seen as the guys who aren't good enough to play bass or drums, so they play bass. I chose bass because all of my friends either wanted to play guitar or drums, and I love its deep sound. But yeah good jokes. So very true.

Do you mean guitar and drum?

And I think if you play the bass using slap and pop, most people would notice it.

what do you call a bassist w/out a girlfriend??

Homeless

what do you call a bassist w/out a girlfriend??

Homeless

jrhawk42

Haha, classic! :D

Ahah makes my bassist life crash down :(

Whatever.

1) How do you know your a bassist?

a. You seriously cannot sing

heheheh

juicetino

[QUOTE="War_Munger"]

(i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) )

jakecufc8888

WTF?

For some reason this got me laughing harder than the jokes :lol:

[QUOTE="jakecufc8888"][QUOTE="War_Munger"]

(i like to laugh at myself ((Naked in the mirror)) lol ;) )

Nude_Dude

WTF?

For some reason this got me laughing harder than the jokes :lol:

When I saw it I was like "O.o"

what do you call a bassist w/out a girlfriend??

Homeless

jrhawk42

I don't get it.

[QUOTE="jrhawk42"]

what do you call a bassist w/out a girlfriend??

Homeless

Lonelynight

I don't get it.

What I can make out: Bassists are rarely spoken of or get any recognition so don't get as much money as the singer or guitarist, so it's a joke that the bassists girlfriend has more money than him and even has a house where the bassist doesn't. I think it's quite a funny joke :lol: