Best Jokes

The Best joke ever:

Two Talking Muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "Man, it's hot in here".

The other one says "OMG a talking muffin!"

What's your favorite joke?

why;d the chicken cross the road?
It thought it was frogger. ;)

So this one time, a baby seal walked into a club.

Also, 'Better Nate than lever!' is the best joke ever, followed by the above joke.

"Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are un-aware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative"

Bill Bailey fans unite!

*Patiently waits on the punchline*

why did george w bush get a belly button piercing? because he already has a dick cheney

how did hellen kellers parents punish her? by rearanging the living room furniture.

how did helen keller burn her ear? by answering the iron

Jokes are lame. This is comedy!

"Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are un-aware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative"

Bill Bailey fans unite!

TheOddQuantum

A man is sitting with his woman in the living room.Suddenly he asks her 'How many men have you made sex with before me?'The woman didn't answer and kept staring at the floor.Being afraid that he insulted her the man said 'Are you all right?I'm sorry i didn't want to insult you.'And the woman answered'Shut the f*** up,i'm counting!!!'

A man is sitting with his woman in the living room.Suddenly he asks her 'How many men have you made sex with before me?'The woman didn't answer and kept staring at the floor.Being afraid that he insulted her the man said 'Are you all right?I'm sorry i didn't want to insult you.'And the woman answered'Shut the f*** up,i'm counting!!!'

Soadforever1

A blonde and a man sit together on a plane. The man looks over at the blonde, who is sleeping, and wakes her up. "Why don't we play a game? I'll ask you a question and you will ask me one. But if you don't know the answer then giveme $5.00. If I can't get the answer i'll give you $500.00. So the man asked a question and the blonde handed him $5.00.

"Here's my question... What goes up the hill with 8 legs and comes back down with 3?"

So the man did research and handed the woman $500.00.

"So what was the answer?" the man asked. The woman smiled and handed him $5.00. LOL

A blonde and a man sit together on a plane. The man looks over at the blonde, who is sleeping, and wakes her up. "Why don't we play a game? I'll ask you a question and you will ask me one. But if you don't know the answer then giveme $5.00. If I can't get the answer i'll give you $500.00. So the man asked a question and the blonde handed him $5.00.

"Here's my question... What goes up the hill with 8 legs and comes back down with 3?"

So the man did research and handed the woman $500.00.

"So what was the answer?" the man asked. The woman smiled and handed him $5.00. LOL

crochunter105

hahaha good one!

Okay okay I've told this one numerous times, everyone loves it:D

What's 18 inches long, pink, hard and makes women scream at night?

[spoiler] Crib Death! [/spoiler]

ok ok here we go

why is helen keller a bad driver?

[spoiler] because she's a woman [/spoiler]