Girl Dilemma

Here it is. I'd like to hear your thoughts.

I'm 19 years old. There are two girls ages 17 and 18 that are sisters. The 17 year old hasn't graduated high school yet. (Yes I think it's a little weird that I like her being underage and everything but I'm not interested in a sexual relationship.)

The 18 year old has basically been in love with me for the last 3 years. She dated my best friend for 6 months two years ago in order to spend more time around me when I was dating somebody else. She then broke up with him (really hurting him) but has still been basically obsessed with me ever since and thinks that one day she will have a chance with me once I want to start dating (I dated a girl for almost 2 years but I've been single for about 10 months).

She is really pretty but I'm not interested in being more than friends with her and her history with my best friend completely eliminates any chance. I had always thought that she had liked me but I have only recently become aware of her "obsession" for lack of a better word. Despite this, we are still really good friends and I care about her friendship. We hang out and talk a good amount.

I have really liked the 17 year old for about 9 months now. It hasn't been a really serious thing just kind of a one day maybe things could happen between us. We have been friends for about 4 years and been really good friends for the last 2. I basically started out as kind of an older brother to her but overtime it seems like things have grown beyond that. She is the greatest girl I've ever met and has all of the characteristics and traits that I would want in a woman as well as an excellent family that I truly enjoy being around and really likes me as well. We've been talking (skype, text, IM) throughout everyday for about a month now and I am 95% sure that she also likes me and wants us to be together one day. This has also basically been confirmed by her best friend.

The 17 year old went on a date with my younger brother once and they kissed once but there is no chance of anything else ever happening again (my brother is kind of a douche to girls).

I'm going home this weekend for five days. The 17 year old really wants to hang out while I'm home and especially on Valentine's Day (Neither of us has said that we like each other and as far as I'm concerned we are both just really good friends). The 18 year old just so happens to be going home this weekend as well and has also expressed interest in hanging out on Valentine's Day. I would not be surprised at all if she happened to express her feelings to me.

Now that you understand the basics of this weird love pentagram my question is what do I do?

I am perfectly capable of waiting a year or two for the 17 year old girl and she has also hinted about "waiting for the right guy" (aka me). I do not want to date a high schooler but I still want her to kind of know that I care I guess. And I have no idea what to do about the 18 year old. Multiple people (my very close friends included) have told her that there is no chance but she has blown them all off as being selfish or jealous of how I hang out with her. I want the 18 year old to know that I'm not interested in her but I'm afraid that if I talk to her directly it will make for a massively awkward situation.

Also, I'm afraid that if word gets out that I like the 17 year old there could be a massive family brawl between the sisters of some sort. The 17 year old will not tell her sister her feelings and will basically not start any sort of relationship with me if her sister is in the way.

Please help. This could be a very awkward weekend. Let me know if you have any advice or questions I can answer. Apologies for the wall of text.

Is that a 90's M3? or 3 series. God, I love the shape of Beamers in the late 90's.Danzg49

Is that a 90's M3? or 3 series. God, I love the shape of Beamers in the late 90's.Danzg49

why not double date them;)

but in all honesty if you do get with the younger sister and things dont work out it could be kind of awkward with the older sister and vise versa

so my advise dont date either of them and look for another girl

Let the 18 year old down gently and leave it a while before you go for her sister. But you might want to tell the 18 year old that you're interested in her sister. Might be better in the long run.

What's your secret? I am apparently totally oblivious to girls liking me and have missed several chances according to some female friends of mine. I will never get in a relationship if I am expected to make the moves.

Regarding your situation, it's best to simply be honest about it to avoid raising false hopes. Talk to the 18 year old, and confess to the 17 year old. Keeping it a secret from the 18 year old may or may not be a good idea, depending on what kind of person she is. Judging from how she used your best friend, it may be better to keep it a secret.

Thanks guys. Really helpful. I appreciate it. I figured I would have to confront the 18 year old eventually.

GTA_Dude, sorry man I was just asking for some advice. I hope your situation works out well for you in the end.

17 is usually the legal age to have sex and there is nothing wrrong with a 19 year old going out with a 17 year old.

dude....sounds like a future jerry springer episode to me..

Personally I would avoid lady obsessive at all costs, make sure somebody else gives her the hint if you're worried she's too wacked out to do it yourself, and wait for the younger girl. I don't think a 17 year old dating a 19 year old is odd, I know 13 year olds who date 30 year old men. Just talk to her about her sister, see what happens.XilePrincess

I know it isn't, I'm just saying that the TC's problem isn't really that big of a deal, cause some people's problems dwarf it in comparison (Like my problem). Like seriously, I'd rather have to deal with his then have mine.....GTA_dude

[QUOTE="GTA_dude"]I know it isn't, I'm just saying that the TC's problem isn't really that big of a deal, cause some people's problems dwarf it in comparison (Like my problem). Like seriously, I'd rather have to deal with his then have mine.....tofu-lion91

This girl advice problem disappoints. Touch her shoulder.

[QUOTE="XilePrincess"]Personally I would avoid lady obsessive at all costs, make sure somebody else gives her the hint if you're worried she's too wacked out to do it yourself, and wait for the younger girl. I don't think a 17 year old dating a 19 year old is odd, I know 13 year olds who date 30 year old men. Just talk to her about her sister, see what happens.eagle63

[QUOTE="eagle63"]

[QUOTE="XilePrincess"]Personally I would avoid lady obsessive at all costs, make sure somebody else gives her the hint if you're worried she's too wacked out to do it yourself, and wait for the younger girl. I don't think a 17 year old dating a 19 year old is odd, I know 13 year olds who date 30 year old men. Just talk to her about her sister, see what happens.XilePrincess

I'd just have a threesomeCyleM

lol just what i was thinking

my advice is quit being attracted to drama (what high school girls/sisters bring) and find someone else to like. it's not that hard, try and play the field a little- your only 19 and your trying to tie yourself down.

Best thing to do is be frank and tell the 18-year-old that you're completely, absolutely not interested. Explain it as best you can. I would advise you to hang out with her less as this is commonly seen as "leading girls on." Yeah, she's a good friend, but it would hurt her less if you stopped palling around with her so much. Second, keep your affection for the 17-year-old under tight wraps because that does generally get very nasty. You shouldn't have to wait long for her to be eighteen and to propose an official-type relationship; better safe than sorry, even if the relationship is 100% consensual. You could use the meantime to let emotions between you and your 18-year-old suitor settle. In simple words, plan for your future by taking small precautions now, because those small precautions will lead to solid establishments of boundaries in the future. Hope that helps.

I'd go with this.

Well said.

You want a real girl dilemma? Try getting the girl of your dreams for the past 3 years, you've thought about her for the moment you saw her, who you ended up being her dream guy too, but then, after being in a relationship for a couple months, have her get too attached to where you have her scared of being with you cause she is afraid of loosing you cause your going off to military boot camp it 36 days. Yeah, try dealing with that. You finally get the girl of your dreams, who is everything you ever wanted, and is unbelievably hot, but you cant get too close to her cause she is afraid of getting hurt cause of a irreversible decision you made a few months before you got together. And you both are absolutely perfect for each other, and the sex is unbelievable, but 2 months before you leave she is afraid of getting too attacted so you cant see her anymore. Try dealing with that. I already got my dream girl, and I dont want anyone else, and she only wants me as well, but you were a few years too late, so you cant be together. FML. I dont think you really have a problem....GTA_dude