Here's why Harry Potter should be a mainstream religion (it's real).

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yabbicoke

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#1 yabbicoke
Member since 2007 • 4069 Posts

Many people think that Harry Potter is a work of fiction, simply because there's no "proof" to suggest otherwise. Sure, J.K. Rowling has acted like these are works of fiction, but there are many strong theories that discredit her claims (listed below). And while my faith is strong enough for me to realize that everything in Harry Potter is in fact true, I realize that some people do not see reality as clearly as I do. Over the last few years, I have gathered quite a bit of evidence that supports my theory that Harry Potter is a religious text which we should all follow and heed. Here is my list:

First off, I believe one of the best pieces of evidence to support the existence of Harry Potter is simply because you can't disprove it. It even lays out very plainly in the books how the magical community use their powers to hide themselves. Obviously we wouldn't have any solid evidence, because they are magic and we are not. But I know what you're thinking... surely at some point there must be SOME slip somewhere in there world, and my answer would be that of course there are! I think a lot of "paranormal activity" reported around the world is actually some kind of magical sighting that was failed to be kept completely hidden. Not only that, the magical world can erase our memories... you might have seen someone use a wand right in front of you, but you just can't remember it. Some people say a single book is a poor source of knowledge about existense, but I believe this does not apply in my religion because there are seven books. That's seven times the evidence.

A few years ago, I decided to find physical evidence that the story of Harry Potter is historical text depicting how our savior bravely defended us from a dark and terrible wizard. I decided to seek one of the most sought after relics one could hope to find; the Holy Goblet of Fire. This goblet was the actual cup depicted in the fourth book, the one which our savior touched, and which brought him before the Dark Lord. After months of tireless searching, I finally found a man on Craigslist from Tennessee who claimed to have the actual relic. When I inquired as to how he came upon the goblet, he seemed rather reluctant to tell me the whole story, but he claimed to have gotten it from a source that had actually known the real Harry Potter. I met this man at a Denny's, and he showed me the article. It indeed matched the description found in the text, and after close inspection, I deemed it to be genuine. The man turned out to be rather portly man with an enormous beard, and I believe he may actually have been a wizard himself. I paid the magical wizard from the internet $12,000 for the goblet... that's almost the amount I make in a year, but little did the man know that that was still a bargain for such a priceless artifact.

And now, the whole "J.k. Rowling denying these are factual thing". The strongest theory we have now is that Rowling is actually Lord Voldemort in disguise. We believe he actually wrote and distributed the holy text himself, but with an altered ending... that's right, WE HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THAT BEYOND A DOUBT, VOLDEMORT MAY HAVE INFILTRATED OUR COMMUNITY, AND WE ARE 100% CERTAIN THAT THE ENDING OF THE DEATHLY HOLLOW MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE BEEN ALTERED. We now believe that the Dark Lord has not yet been killed by Harry Potter, and if we don't have faith that this is a real problem, he will have no trouble conquering the world.

And finally, I believe the ultimate piece of evidence for the existence of Harry Potter is that the world is simply too amazing for there not to be magic. Science makes absolutely no sense, and therefore it is only logical the entire universe runs off magic, and everything ever can be explained by magic. When you put magic into the equation, everything suddenly makes sense, so it must be true. Even if you can't see the evidence as clearly as I do, you should still have faith, because if you're wrong, Lord Voldemort will just become stronger and stronger, and Harry Potter will leave you behind when he creates the new magical world of nirvana.

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no_more_fayth

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#3 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

This religion would be cooler than others and just as believable.

You may have something here. =3

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LJS9502_basic

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#4 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180194 Posts
Wouldn't work. She contradicted her world by the end of the series. If the author doesn't buy the world....why should we?
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Theokhoth

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#5 Theokhoth
Member since 2008 • 36799 Posts
Anyone who buys into Potterianity is deluded. Everybody knows the only reason why Rowling's fogland cult is so popular is because she spread it across Europe by the wand. The "holy" scripture is full of immoral crap: "I will never rest until I've learned that Curse of the Bogies Quirrell told us about, and used it on you." -- Sorcerer's Stone, P. 157. Such a loving deity. :roll:
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Rutzfuz

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#6 Rutzfuz
Member since 2010 • 1202 Posts

Wouldn't work. She contradicted her world by the end of the series. If the author doesn't buy the world....why should we?LJS9502_basic
Because we are always trying to find the "perfect" religion.

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ArchonOver

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#7 ArchonOver
Member since 2010 • 1103 Posts

Here's why it shouldn't be a religion, because it's Harry ****ing POTTER.

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J-man45

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#8 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

I read the entire OP, and got a good laugh.

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no_more_fayth

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#9 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

Here's why it shouldn't be a religion, because it's Harry ****ing POTTER.

ArchonOver

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

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LJS9502_basic

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#10 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180194 Posts

[QUOTE="LJS9502_basic"]Wouldn't work. She contradicted her world by the end of the series. If the author doesn't buy the world....why should we?Rutzfuz

Because we are always trying to find the "perfect" religion.

Do you seek imperfection then?
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J-man45

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#11 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

It's also funny to think that if the HP world were real, then that would automatically qualify it as a religion. Ironic is the fact that religion is absence from the books, besides the symbolism placed by the author, Potter and his friends know no god.

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J-man45

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#12 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="ArchonOver"]

Here's why it shouldn't be a religion, because it's Harry ****ing POTTER.

no_more_fayth

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

You know it's fiction because you know that the author just made it up.

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no_more_fayth

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#13 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

The point (I think) TC is trying to make is that the world of Harry Potter is just as believable as the bible.

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no_more_fayth

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#14 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="ArchonOver"]

Here's why it shouldn't be a religion, because it's Harry ****ing POTTER.

J-man45

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

You know it's fiction because you know that the author just made it up.

The same could be said about religious books.

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LJS9502_basic

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#15 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180194 Posts

The point (I think) TC is trying to make is that the world of Harry Potter is just as believable as the bible.

no_more_fayth
I don't see the point in that....
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dunl12496

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#16 dunl12496
Member since 2009 • 5710 Posts

:lol: Is this a troll?

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J-man45

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#17 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"]

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

no_more_fayth

You know it's fiction because you know that the author just made it up.

The same could be said about religious books.

No, it can't. You're missing the point.

I can PROVE that Harry Potter is fictional by talking to the author, but the authors of the Bible are not alive, are they?

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no_more_fayth

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#18 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

The point (I think) TC is trying to make is that the world of Harry Potter is just as believable as the bible.

LJS9502_basic

I don't see the point in that....

That's what I think he's trying to do.

I never said there was a point. :P

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Theokhoth

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#19 Theokhoth
Member since 2008 • 36799 Posts

The point (I think) TC is trying to make is that the world of Harry Potter is just as believable as the bible.

no_more_fayth

[QUOTE="ArchonOver"]

Here's why it shouldn't be a religion, because it's Harry ****ing POTTER.

no_more_fayth

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

On the back cover of each book is the word "fiction."
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no_more_fayth

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#20 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="J-man45"]

You know it's fiction because you know that the author just made it up.

J-man45

The same could be said about religious books.

No, it can't. You're missing the point.

I can PROVE that Harry Potter is fictional by talking to the author, but the authors of the Bible are not alive, are they?

I'm just saying what I think the TC is trying to say.

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no_more_fayth

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#21 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

On the back cover of each book is the word "fiction."Theokhoth

I think the bible is fiction.

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J-man45

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#22 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"]

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

The same could be said about religious books.

no_more_fayth

No, it can't. You're missing the point.

I can PROVE that Harry Potter is fictional by talking to the author, but the authors of the Bible are not alive, are they?

I'm just saying what I think the TC is trying to say.

Then stop trying to be the advocate for TC if you agree he's not making sense.

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no_more_fayth

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#23 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

I'm not being the advocate for anything.

It's amazing how I say anything anti-religious always sparks an argument.

I wasn't even trying to do that.

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mywalletsgone

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#24 mywalletsgone
Member since 2010 • 1344 Posts

Haha hasn't HP overtaken the bible in sales? :>

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yabbicoke

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#25 yabbicoke
Member since 2007 • 4069 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="ArchonOver"]

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

J-man45

You know it's fiction because you know that the author just made it up.

I already stated the flawed logic of your argument. You can't prove that J.K. Rowling wrote these books, or that she even exists. Most scholars on this subject now believe that the texts (the original texts) were written by someone very close to Harry Potter, possibly a student at the school or even a friend.

The point (I think) TC is trying to make is that the world of Harry Potter is just as believable as the bible.

no_more_fayth
Prove it.
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cybrcatter

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#26 cybrcatter
Member since 2003 • 16210 Posts

Anyone who buys into Potterianity is deluded. Everybody knows the only reason why Rowling's fogland cult is so popular is because she spread it across Europe by the wand. The "holy" scripture is full of immoral crap: "I will never rest until I've learned that Curse of the Bogies Quirrell told us about, and used it on you." -- Sorcerer's Stone, P. 157. Such a loving deity. :roll:Theokhoth
You just don't know how to interpret the text.

You can't take it at face value.

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ImaPirate0202

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#27 ImaPirate0202
Member since 2005 • 4473 Posts

And while my faith is strong enough for me to realize that everything in Harry Potter is in fact true

yabbicoke

I lol'd

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J-man45

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#28 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts
[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

I'm not being the advocate for anything.

It's amazing how I say anything anti-religious always sparks an argument.

I wasn't even trying to do that.

Arguments are fun, but of course, my apologies.

Haha hasn't HP overtaken the bible in sales? :>

mywalletsgone
"If counted as a single book, the Bible is the best-selling book in history with approximate sales estimates ranging in the billions" (wikipedia)
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alexside1

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#29 alexside1
Member since 2006 • 4412 Posts
Citation needed please.
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Theokhoth

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#30 Theokhoth
Member since 2008 • 36799 Posts

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"] On the back cover of each book is the word "fiction."no_more_fayth

I think the bible is fiction.

Then you'd be wrong; there are many people, places and events in the Bible that are historically accurate. At best is a mingling of fictional metaphor (not the same as HP fiction) and historical fact, like The Odyssey.
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yabbicoke

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#31 yabbicoke
Member since 2007 • 4069 Posts

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]Anyone who buys into Potterianity is deluded. Everybody knows the only reason why Rowling's fogland cult is so popular is because she spread it across Europe by the wand. The "holy" scripture is full of immoral crap: "I will never rest until I've learned that Curse of the Bogies Quirrell told us about, and used it on you." -- Sorcerer's Stone, P. 157. Such a loving deity. :roll:cybrcatter

You just don't know how to interpret the text.

You can't take it at face value.

Exactly, the sacred texts are far too complicated to assume that what's presented has no deeper meaning. Not everything in Harry Potter should be taken literally.

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no_more_fayth

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#32 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

"If counted as a single book, the Bible is the best-selling book in history with approximate sales estimates ranging in the billions" (wikipedia)J-man45

There's, like, a bajillion different versions though. :P

That's not fair. :o

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no_more_fayth

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#33 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"] On the back cover of each book is the word "fiction."Theokhoth

I think the bible is fiction.

Then you'd be wrong; there are many people, places and events in the Bible that are historically accurate. At best is a mingling of fictional metaphor (not the same as HP fiction) and historical fact, like The Odyssey.

They live in England in Harry Potter.

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Theokhoth

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#34 Theokhoth
Member since 2008 • 36799 Posts

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]Anyone who buys into Potterianity is deluded. Everybody knows the only reason why Rowling's fogland cult is so popular is because she spread it across Europe by the wand. The "holy" scripture is full of immoral crap: "I will never rest until I've learned that Curse of the Bogies Quirrell told us about, and used it on you." -- Sorcerer's Stone, P. 157. Such a loving deity. :roll:cybrcatter

You just don't know how to interpret the text.

You can't take it at face value.

So you just pick and choose what to believe?

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J-man45

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#35 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"]

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="ArchonOver"]

How is Harry Potter less believable than other religious books?

yabbicoke

You know it's fiction because you know that the author just made it up.

I already stated the flawed logic of your argument. You can't prove that J.K. Rowling wrote these books, or that she even exists. Most scholars on this subject now believe that the texts (the original texts) were written by someone very close to Harry Potter, possibly a student at the school or even a friend.

:lol:

I can't prove that J.K. Rowling exists? Ever heard of birth certificates, hospital records, family members, friends, photos, schools? All could giveproof to the existence of J.K. Rowling.

And as for proving that she wrote the books, first I easily prove that she exists, then I talk to the PUBLISHER, who can easily verify that Rowling did indeed write the books. Also personal testimonies, etc.

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Theokhoth

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#36 Theokhoth
Member since 2008 • 36799 Posts

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"][QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

I think the bible is fiction.

no_more_fayth

Then you'd be wrong; there are many people, places and events in the Bible that are historically accurate. At best is a mingling of fictional metaphor (not the same as HP fiction) and historical fact, like The Odyssey.

They live in England in Harry Potter.

England doesn't exist.
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mywalletsgone

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#37 mywalletsgone
Member since 2010 • 1344 Posts

"If counted as a single book, the Bible is the best-selling book in history with approximate sales estimates ranging in the billions" (wikipedia)J-man45

That's from Wikipedia though!

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no_more_fayth

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#38 no_more_fayth
Member since 2010 • 11928 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"] Then you'd be wrong; there are many people, places and events in the Bible that are historically accurate. At best is a mingling of fictional metaphor (not the same as HP fiction) and historical fact, like The Odyssey.Theokhoth

They live in England in Harry Potter.

England doesn't exist.

You don't exist.

This is the Matrix. :o

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ImaPirate0202

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#39 ImaPirate0202
Member since 2005 • 4473 Posts

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"][QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

They live in England in Harry Potter.

no_more_fayth

England doesn't exist.

You don't exist.

This is the Matrix. :o

There is no spoon.

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J-man45

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#40 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"]"If counted as a single book, the Bible is the best-selling book in history with approximate sales estimates ranging in the billions" (wikipedia)mywalletsgone

That's from Wikipedia though!

So?
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Theokhoth

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#41 Theokhoth
Member since 2008 • 36799 Posts

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"] England doesn't exist. ImaPirate0202

You don't exist.

This is the Matrix. :o

There is no spoon.

You can't prove that.
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ImaPirate0202

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#42 ImaPirate0202
Member since 2005 • 4473 Posts

[QUOTE="ImaPirate0202"]

[QUOTE="no_more_fayth"]

You don't exist.

This is the Matrix. :o

Theokhoth

There is no spoon.

You can't prove that.

touche'

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cybrcatter

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#43 cybrcatter
Member since 2003 • 16210 Posts

[QUOTE="cybrcatter"]

[QUOTE="Theokhoth"]Anyone who buys into Potterianity is deluded. Everybody knows the only reason why Rowling's fogland cult is so popular is because she spread it across Europe by the wand. The "holy" scripture is full of immoral crap: "I will never rest until I've learned that Curse of the Bogies Quirrell told us about, and used it on you." -- Sorcerer's Stone, P. 157. Such a loving deity. :roll:Theokhoth

You just don't know how to interpret the text.

You can't take it at face value.

So you just pick and choose what to believe?

Absolutely not.

It's simply our duty to make sure that the interpretations fit with what the real meanings were intended to be.

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LJS9502_basic

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#44 LJS9502_basic
Member since 2003 • 180194 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"]"If counted as a single book, the Bible is the best-selling book in history with approximate sales estimates ranging in the billions" (wikipedia)mywalletsgone

That's from Wikipedia though!

It's generally accepted the bible is the best seller. As much as Potter sold I don't think it can beat the bible.
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mywalletsgone

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#45 mywalletsgone
Member since 2010 • 1344 Posts

[QUOTE="mywalletsgone"]

[QUOTE="J-man45"]"If counted as a single book, the Bible is the best-selling book in history with approximate sales estimates ranging in the billions" (wikipedia)J-man45

That's from Wikipedia though!

So?

There's not even a citation for that, plus I bet it was some Christnut wiki mod who wrote that! Also there's like, loads of versions of the bible that's like cheating.

HP 1-0 Christianity

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J-man45

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#46 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"][QUOTE="mywalletsgone"]

That's from Wikipedia though!

mywalletsgone

So?

There's not even a citation for that, plus I bet it was some Christnut wiki mod who wrote that! Also there's like, loads of versions of the bible that's like cheating.

HP1-0Christianity

:lol: There's loads of versions of Harry Potter too.

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mywalletsgone

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#47 mywalletsgone
Member since 2010 • 1344 Posts

[QUOTE="mywalletsgone"]

[QUOTE="J-man45"] So?J-man45

There's not even a citation for that, plus I bet it was some Christnut wiki mod who wrote that! Also there's like, loads of versions of the bible that's like cheating.

HP1-0Christianity

:lol: There's loads of versions of Harry Potter too.

Hey I don't see King James Harry Potter!

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J-man45

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#48 J-man45
Member since 2008 • 11043 Posts

[QUOTE="J-man45"]

[QUOTE="mywalletsgone"]

There's not even a citation for that, plus I bet it was some Christnut wiki mod who wrote that! Also there's like, loads of versions of the bible that's like cheating.

HP1-0Christianity

mywalletsgone

:lol: There's loads of versions of Harry Potter too.

Hey I don't see King James Harry Potter!

I meant languages, as in translated into 67 different languages.

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mywalletsgone

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#49 mywalletsgone
Member since 2010 • 1344 Posts

[QUOTE="mywalletsgone"]

[QUOTE="J-man45"]

:lol: There's loads of versions of Harry Potter too.

J-man45

Hey I don't see King James Harry Potter!

I meant languages, as in translated into 67 different languages.

How do you expect Rowling to seriously establisha religious codeif she only publishes in English?

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Cataclism

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#50 Cataclism
Member since 2007 • 1537 Posts

I see what you did there :roll: