last name change upon marriage?

Just curious about what people think regarding last name change upon marriage. I personally still would prefer it if the woman took my last name if/when I get married. You? If your answer is no, would you expect the child to take your last name or some hyphenated mix of the two parents' names?

Let me rephrase the question; would you rather have your wife take your last name, or keep her own?

This is one of the things that ought to be discussed before the proposal is made.

Doesn't matter, whichever sounds better.

Kinda seems a bit of an outdated custom from the days when a bride was basically considered property for her family to give to the groom's family. I suppose that if the girl wanted to out of a romantic gesture or some such, then I wouldn't stop her, but I certainly wouldn't expect it.

Her choice completely. I do like the idea of sharing the same name as my spouse and I like my last name, but I wouldn't press the issue as it is rather trivial.

It doesn't really matter too much, but it's most common for the wife to take the husbands last name.

As for me, some sort of change will happen. I'll have to see what my spouse's last name is before deciding. :P

My last name is better (so to speak) than my bf's but I'll take his anyway. I kind of think of this like I do white wedding dresses- a perhaps outdated custom that is no longer a must. Do whatever makes you happy and fits your life.

I'd take my wife's name if it was something awesome like Bearstrangler.

I would take my wife's last name if i ever got married, thats a big IF.

No. I would have to get a new social security card if I did that, plus my initials wouldn't be the same if I did and I like my initials very much.

Yes, I think hyphonates are ridiculous.

And I find people who think it's "sexist" for the woman to take the man's last name to be equally ridiculous.

I would take my wife's last name if i ever got married, thats a big IF.

Jesus_on_fire

I'd find it weird if she took my name.

It depends. If anything, I would just hyphenate my name if I didn't like their last name.

My first boyfriends last name was Gross. I wouldn't have taken that, may have hyphenated it to Robinson-Gross. My last boyfriends last name was Kerr, I would have taken that.

Not like any of tht matters now though :D

as long as it was not something like smith ,i wouldn't have a problem with taking my wife's last name,although i'm pretty sure my dad wouldn't react so well towards such decision.

My name or the highway.

I'm thinking when I get married, we're both changing our last names to either "Plissken" or "Nukem".

I'd change my name, mostly because I despise it. Weird ass unique name everyone misspells and makes fun of ftl.

Her name would have to be downright horrible for me to think otherwise.

If I get married, it would be nice for her to do so.

Being from Iceland my last name is a patronym (My last name is Steingrimsson, if your last name is something that ends with -son or -sen, then it is an old relic from a patronymic time), all Icelanders keep their patronym until they die. The only exception of the system, is if the father is unknown or if the mother or the child resents the father, then a matronym is used.

So the answer is no. Even if I had a family name, I wouldn't give it to my wife, except if she really wanted to. But I would want our children to be named after me, they can get her family name too, if she has one, but it wouldn't be the same without the patrnonym. Tradition is funny like that.

I don't really care if she took my last name to be honest.

I'm doing it, because I want to. If I were professional before marriage, like oprah or gwen stefani, and my name was my staple, I'd go by my maiden name as my professional name, but by my married name on legal documents. I'm fairly certain a woman is allowed to use both her maiden name and married name legally, so I don't understand why anyone wouldn't take their husband's last name. I would NEVER hyphenate my kids' last names, my last name now is 10 letters, my boyfriend's is 7. I'm planning on giving my kids 2 middle names, so having a 17-letter last name would just be cruel.XilePrincess

[QUOTE="XilePrincess"]I'm doing it, because I want to. If I were professional before marriage, like oprah or gwen stefani, and my name was my staple, I'd go by my maiden name as my professional name, but by my married name on legal documents. I'm fairly certain a woman is allowed to use both her maiden name and married name legally, so I don't understand why anyone wouldn't take their husband's last name. I would NEVER hyphenate my kids' last names, my last name now is 10 letters, my boyfriend's is 7. I'm planning on giving my kids 2 middle names, so having a 17-letter last name would just be cruel.Fox-Call

Kinda seems a bit of an outdated custom from the days when a bride was basically considered property for her family to give to the groom's family.GabuEx

2 middle names is stupid except when a woman gets married and has First-middle-maiden-husband's name.

On topic, I'd prefer and try to persuade her to take my last name, but I wouldn't make a big issue out of it.

Fox-Call

Either way wouldn't really bother me, so, her choice.

I actually believe the wife should keep her last name and the children should take the last name of the wife. If the couple decides to have children, their children will start their prenatal journey in the womb and will emerge from the womb. Therefore, it makes sense that the children that come from the mother, have a last name that comes from the mother.

As for the husband, I think he should take the wife's last name so he will be recognized as both the husband of the wife and the father of the children if they decide to have any.

I'm not sure if I want to take the last name of my wife because my family is somewhat traditional and may not like that, but perhaps I will in spite of them. I don't like to do something because my family expects me to do it.

I really wouldn't care if she would take my last name or not; I'd just be happy as all hell that she said yes. The children will have my last name though.

Edit: Actually I think I'll just draw inspiration from Marshall and Lily in himym. We'll change both of our last names and we'll be Mr. and Mrs. Awesome. :)

My girlfriend is very traditional so she expects her last name to change when she gets married. I believe in it aswell but then again I'm a fairly traditional guy.

I wouldn't care if my wife took my last name or not.

As for children, I would do everything in my power not to have them.

Where I live, Quebec, women aren't allowed to take their husbands name upon marriage. The law was passed back in 1981 to promote equality. It doesn't bother me, I wouldn't expect my wife to take my last name.

Of course. My wife was a licensed attorney who had been published in multiple law reviews when she married me, and she still took my name. It's just practical to have the same last name when you're married. Bank accounts, mortgages, rental agreements, legal issues with community property and joint tenancy by the entirety, legal issues with proof of relationship, debates over what last names to give your kids, and the list goes on particularly with regard to legal hassles. Unless there is some hugely compelling reason to not do it, you'd have to be an idiot to keep separate last names after marriage.

it depends how nice the guys name is cause i kinda like my name as it is ;)

It's just practical to have the same last name when you're married. Bank accounts, mortgages, rental agreements, legal issues with community property and joint tenancy by the entirety, legal issues with proof of relationship, debates over what last names to give your kids, and the list goes on particularly with regard to legal hassles. Unless there is some hugely compelling reason to not do it, you'd have to be an idiot to keep separate last names after marriage.

Communistik

Why didn't you take hers?

as long as she dosen't hyponate it who cares having a name like Jane Doe-Smith seems really bad to me

I'd like it if she were to take my name, I think hyphens are stupid, and I'm definitely not taking hers.

Where I live, Quebec, women aren't allowed to take their husbands name upon marriage. The law was passed back in 1981 to promote equality. It doesn't bother me, I wouldn't expect my wife to take my last name.

redstorm72

[QUOTE="Communistik"]

It's just practical to have the same last name when you're married. Bank accounts, mortgages, rental agreements, legal issues with community property and joint tenancy by the entirety, legal issues with proof of relationship, debates over what last names to give your kids, and the list goes on particularly with regard to legal hassles. Unless there is some hugely compelling reason to not do it, you'd have to be an idiot to keep separate last names after marriage.

entropyecho

Why didn't you take hers?

Because we agreed to take mine.

[QUOTE="redstorm72"]

Where I live, Quebec, women aren't allowed to take their husbands name upon marriage. The law was passed back in 1981 to promote equality. It doesn't bother me, I wouldn't expect my wife to take my last name.

Genetic_Code

They can still get their names changed, but they have to go through all the legalities with the provincial government and must give a reason other than marriage as their reason for changing their name. As for it being law, I guess they felt that due to societal beliefs, many women would be forced into taking their husbands name even if they really didn't want to.