Make Up A Nonsensical Southern Quote

The format simply needs to have an animal in the 1st half while the 2nd can be an action. Here are some I found from a website.

"Well jump on a horse and feed me hotlinks, what the hell are you talking about"

"Well jump on your pig and smack you hiney, I think you just might be right."

"Well bite your monkey and call it Sally,....."

"well poke a badger and spank me..."

isnt this rascist btw?

"well poke a badger and spank me..."

isnt this rascist btw?

muppet1010

"well poke a badger and spank me..."

isnt this rascist btw?

muppet1010

No, it just seems stupid to me....but thats just my opinion.

this isn't one i made up but i can't resist to passup a chance to shareit :P

this is an actual phone conversation that took place between my wife's mother and one of her friends (note: my wife's mother was talking about her husband)

"Yeah he's showin' his ass again and got his face on. He better quit before he gets on my side!"

hes as useful as a 5th tit on a boar hog

I love this English one: F**k me, that flies like S**t off a shovel! Awesome.

[QUOTE="muppet1010"]

"well poke a badger and spank me..."

isnt this rascist btw?

B05T0N

ok I guess "rascist" was the wrong word but if upper-c|ass londoners came up with something liek this for us "scum" northeners then there would be complaints... all i was thinking.

edit: apparently c|ass is censored and well.. made my post look offensive :P

[QUOTE="B05T0N"][QUOTE="muppet1010"]

"well poke a badger and spank me..."

isnt this rascist btw?

muppet1010

ok I guess "rascist" was the wrong word but if upper-c|ass londoners came up with something liek this for us "scum" northeners then there would be complaints... all i was thinking.

edit: apparently c|ass is censored and well.. made my post look offensive :P

Not made up, but still funny.

"But God don't talk in Arabic. He talks in a REAL language, namely, English. It's true that back in them days He translated that to some other language after Speaking it in English, but after all, it's His universe and He can do what He doggone well wants to do."

"The Liberal MEEEEDIIIUHH"JML897

Hahaha

There ain't no crack in that pack.

Ha, and I did that without using animals. :)

"we dun like ur kiiind around here"

sorry couldn't resist...

Well slap my snake and feed me pancakes. :|RoflSponge

sounds like a good time to me