Man has sex with 1000 CARS

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2000899/Man-admits-%27having-sex%27-with-1,000-cars.html

Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men.

But his wandering eye has spread beyond cars to other vehicles. He says that his most intense sexual experience was "making love" to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.

As well as Vanilla, he regularly spends time with his other vehicles – a 1973 Opal GT, named Cinnamon, and 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger.

Hey, whatever makes you happy...

"America, **** yeah!"

That's all I really have to say to this...

atleast he is not raping children :?II_Seraphim_II

[QUOTE="II_Seraphim_II"]atleast he is not raping children :?freek666

teh horrors!!!!! :cry:

[QUOTE="freek666"][QUOTE="II_Seraphim_II"]atleast he is not raping children :?II_Seraphim_II

teh horrors!!!!! :cry:

We need new laws to protect innocent cars and helicopters from such evil persons.

anyone remember the guy who had sex with the picnic table? :lol: classic :DII_Seraphim_II

Men are drifting away from women these days

"There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them"

:lol: Crazy stuff, to each his own i suppose.

It sounds odd but he's not hurting anyone so I don't see the problem with ittofu-lion91

Carbon monoxide poisoning?

"Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" - a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla..."

LMAO, how the hell he knows that those cars are girl? i mean look..cars have exhaust..that must be a boy sign.

[QUOTE="tofu-lion91"]It sounds odd but he's not hurting anyone so I don't see the problem with itOriental_Jams

Carbon monoxide poisoning?

I suppose but then he'd just be hurting himself. How does he do it anyway? Up the exhaust? That would be hot as hell if someone had just been driving it!

[QUOTE="II_Seraphim_II"]anyone remember the guy who had sex with the picnic table? :lol: classic :Dfreshgman

Men are drifting away from women these days

cant really blame them with sum women today. I think alot of women are starting to drink the crazy juice, well atleast the ones i meet. You can just tell by looking into their eyes that sumthing isnt right...

"Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" - a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla..."

LMAO, how the hell he knows that those cars are girl? i mean look..cars have exhaust..that must be a boy sign.

fallconet

Not really. He can use it to pleasure himself in the same way a woman can. Maybe he just lubes up the inside of it or something. Hopefully he wont make the same mistake as that guy and pour hot butter into the exhaust. I mean, how exactly will you give a car a PS2 game?

[QUOTE="Oriental_Jams"]

[QUOTE="tofu-lion91"]It sounds odd but he's not hurting anyone so I don't see the problem with ittofu-lion91

Carbon monoxide poisoning?

I suppose but then he'd just be hurting himself. How does he do it anyway? Up the exhaust? That would be hot as hell if someone had just been driving it!

dunno...maybe he likes sum "backdoor" action. *wink wink*

i know it was bad, but i couldnt resist :P

anyone remember the guy who had sex with the picnic table? :lol: classic :DII_Seraphim_II

[QUOTE="fallconet"]

"Edward Smith, who lives with his current "girlfriend" - a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla..."

LMAO, how the hell he knows that those cars are girl? i mean look..cars have exhaust..that must be a boy sign.

freek666

Not really. He can use it to pleasure himself in the same way a woman can. Maybe he just lubes up the inside of it or something. Hopefully he wont make the same mistake as that guy and pour hot butter into the exhaust. I mean, how exactly will you give a car a PS2 game?

LMAO!!! dude...that guy was/is the biggest failure i have ever had the (dis)pleasure of knowing of. That whole story just got me it was funny. Im pretty certain it was all BS, but nonethelss funny BS! here are the things that got me:

1. If she agrees to sleep with him, im assuming she is aroused. If so, he wouldnt need any lube in the first place unless if...well, u know :P

2. Of all the things he coulda used, he decides to use butter? ok fair enough....he can use butter.

3. What type of idiot puts the butter in the microwave!? and then didnt he see it steaming!? I mean WTF man!?

lol, that thread was great...does anyone still have the link to it?

there was a documentry on in the uk about this sort of thing a bit ago apparently he's not alonemarkop2003

Yeh there's a woman that married a wall and cheated on it with a fence (I wish I was joking!)

[QUOTE="markop2003"]there was a documentry on in the uk about this sort of thing a bit ago apparently he's not alonetofu-lion91

Yeh there's a woman that married a wall and cheated on it with a fence (I wish I was joking!)

What day was that on? and what channel? I bet it was channel 5.

there was a documentry on in the uk about this sort of thing a bit ago apparently he's not alonemarkop2003

Wow. Just imagine the future where cars will have simple AIs that can talk about simple things. I can imagine those type of people will create special "sex versions". You'll have something like the Knight Rider's Kit but then female and very "naughty"...

I was dissapointed that it was not explained HOW this man engaged in the act. Mystic_Legend

[QUOTE="Mystic_Legend"]I was dissapointed that it was not explained HOW this man engaged in the act. Cube_of_MooN

How to have sex with a car?

[QUOTE="Cube_of_MooN"][QUOTE="Mystic_Legend"]I was dissapointed that it was not explained HOW this man engaged in the act. BlackAlpha666

How to have sex with a car?

well at least they have a guide.

[QUOTE="Cube_of_MooN"][QUOTE="Mystic_Legend"]I was dissapointed that it was not explained HOW this man engaged in the act. BlackAlpha666

How to have sex with a car?

lols this is funny guide. my tailpipe is to big to big because its open wider.