Phrases that annoy me in their usage

There are two phrases I am going to list. These phrases annoy me because their usage seems wrong. Not morally, but grammatically. Their meaning seem different or pointless.

#1: Can you imagine?

People often use this to describe something shocking that they heard happen to someone or something else, OR as a way to describe a hypothetical situation. Example: Could you imagine walking into Starbucks and everyone was holding assault rifles?

Well, sir, of course I could imagine. You just did, and I think it's pretty obvious that I could imagine it too. It's easy to imagine something like that.

What it should be replaced by: Can you literally imagine?

See, asking instead, "Can you literally imagine," makes it clear that you are not asking if the other person is capable of imagining ridiculous things, but rather, you are asking them if they could imagine literally experiencing something.

#2: I could care less.

This one particularly annoys me. My fourth grade teacher said it all the time. Oh yeah, and it doesn't make any god damn sense.

People often use this phrase to say that they couldn't give a rats ass about a particular thing or subject. Basically, it is meant to mean "I give so few shits, that I literally couldn't give any less shits."

But, by saying the phrase, you directly contradict its meaning since you are actually saying "I could care less," possibly meaning that you don't not care. You are saying that you have shits to give. You are saying exactly the opposite of what you mean.

What it should be replaced by: I couldn't care less.

By saying that you couldn't care less, you are saying that you have no room to care. You are directly saying "Hey, I have absolutely no fucks to give." It makes much more sense to say this than the former. Yet, people commonly use the former to express the latter.

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So OT, What are phrases that annoy you, and why?

Um..."I could care less" isn't a phrase people say, and if they do it is because they are morons and meant to say "couldn't".

Fist of all: Yes, it is a phrase that people say. Just because you haven't experienced something doesn't mean that others haven't either.

Secondly: "it is because they are morons and meant to say "couldn't". Yeah, that is the very point I was trying to make.

People say it...but it is NOT an actual established phrase that is commonly use, it is simply the misworded version of an actual phrase people use.

Okay then...well do you care to address the first phrase I mentioned?

Not really. I could care less. I mean, can you imagine if I did?

"I don't care." Mainly because it does sound rude and jerk-like.

:P

Not sure. I guess hearing some suburban Fil-Am kids (on my wife's side) try to sound ghetto....mainly the over-use of ain't and fool.

"Could care less" is the worst. Damn Americans, you're ruining our language.

"In any event..."

"Basically..."

"At any rate..."

"There's more than one way to skin a cat.." (How many ways do you need, you sick Nazi?!)

Could you imagine I could care less ;)

Could you imagine is implied more as in have you ever imagined this had happened before I told you. As in it's something so odd, you haven't thought about it before. Otherwise your replacement phrase makes even less sense, why not just use "I couldn't imagine going through that" or a variant, it's pretty established already.

And the second one is sarcastic, basically "look at all the fucks I give". Otherwise "I couldn't care less" already exists.

I never understood when people say "**** me" when something dangerous happens. I understand if you say it when something ridiculously unlucky happens, but why in a dangerous situation?

Would you rather

Only one that annoys me is "Am I the only who...?"

NO YOU FOOL, YOU ARE NEVER THE ONLY ONE

"whatever" is a very aloof, dismissive phrase that doesn't make any sense, and no real way to retort. To me, it translates to "I have nothing constructive to say, I'll pretend I don't care"

Oh man ye hahaha, though I use it a lot too, but it's pretty hilarious when you think about it.

Am I the only one who thought The Dark Knight was overrated?

Also, obligatory.

In English nothing in particular.

In my mother language though, I could list a million.

I couldn't care less

"you can stuff your sorries in a sack." =P

"I could care less" annoys the shit out of me, too. Also, people need to understand "Irregardless" is not a word. It's redundant. "Regardless" already means "without regard".

@PsychoLemons: I'm with you on this. I've actively tried to stop saying "I don't care". I try to say softer things, like "It wouldn't bother me one way or the other". Or, "I don't mind".

Every and all internet meme based phrases.

1. "You know what I mean". at the end of an easily comprehensible sentence.

2. "Not to be rude but...." Followed by something rude...

3. "At the end of the day...." followed by an entirely subjective statement or opinion.

4. "Funnily enough..." followed by something not appropriate to that phrase.

Its less the phrases and more the incorrect context which irritates me

"No offense" before or after something offensive is said.