Rate the lyrics i just wrote

"Truth Addicts"

While the lion howls and wolf does roar
We sprinkle out people to feed the flames of war
The poor ****in suffer
The rich sin wit greed
Alien race dominates while people bleed
Sit back, relax, play it like a game
Words, they sting like bullets I'm bendin my places name
The same, It is What's different, I contradict my faith
Runnin from the devil, racin like a wraith
They're breakin legs like laws
Cripplin people's jaws
The words, they want to speak, leak out the ****in flaws
But shut, they go like windows
No, don't let em hear those
The truth remains a secret, we keep it like baby minnows
Flowin down the stream that I mean to branch away from
I wanna break the line that I tied to help create em
Slaves, we're chained to money
Lickin drips of honey
Soney, I'm raisin stakes and it won't be ****in funny
The government won't protect ya
They'll just keep tryin to sweat ya
You'll rue the day they met ya
And pray but god forgets ya
The long cycle rains from the heaven right down to earth
We have a chance now, move, take it for what it's worth
Stand up now in arms
To fight the hand starves
The right it is now ours
We'll rise up to the stars
Raise a fist with pride in the eyes of your maker
This boat is getting heavy, rock it and try to shake her
Can you hear it now, the voice of thousands gettin stonger
The overthrowin rowin away to short the longer
I'm breakin now, hatin now, they fakin now, it's over
They're luck has just run out, so throw away that clover
And wait
Silence
Just before the storm
Truth addicts be told, this jury is now adjourn

**** = f word

basically it's about an overpowered government and how we need to rise above it.

tell me what you think

(please try not to bash me too hard if you hate it)

p.s. I wish i could give you the rythm that it goes to, but in your mind, try to read it in the way that it flows

tl;dr. and in any other case, i agree with bytgames.

EDIT: okay, i actually read it. i dont really like the way it flows, its like your talking about one thing, then 2 lines later your onto something completely different. i understand that it revolves around one central theme (government) but you cant just get a bunch of catchy lines about the subject and tape it all together. and the title really doesnt fit the lyrics. 4/10

I'm guessing the lyrics is related to politics, but the whole thing is a total mess. First you are talking about something and then suddenly changes to something else. Try to rewrite again :)

Edit: Ah, Mr Zeros talking about the same thing. heh.

It sense none makes....

Your all over the place organize it, get us a tempo Use propeer words and you might just have a crappy song to call your own. Not being a douche just what i think

It seems more like a poem or a rap that just sounds good and has an underlying meaning that you don't get until you actually read the lyrics and interpret them. Sounds cool but i don't feel like reading it over and over again to find out what you mean when you say stuff about licking drips of honey and closing the windows and stuff like that. 6/10.Hatiko

This is probably a bit harsh, but I didn't think it sounded like a song that had an underlying meaning, I thought it sounded like a song that was trying to look like it had an underlying meaning.

Kinda sounds like a bad Flobots wannabee song. 5/10

Sorry for the harsh words, but it's kinda true.

I thought it was a 6/10

Nevermind the guys who slagged you.......they only understand lyrics like " MY MILSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD"