Should I ask her out?

I know you probably think "Don't ask for Relationship help at the OT", but I am not asking how to get a girl to like me. I think that this just requires a person with good social skills in general.

Okay, so I know this girl. We're good friends. And I have been wanting to develop a relationship with her. We eat lunch with 2 other people and talk twice after that usually. Here's how the conversations went throughout the week:

Monday: During lunch, for a couple minutes it was just us two. We got to talking and I got her laughing pretty hard. After lunch I told her a story about my weekend, and I got her to laugh very hard and she even thanked me for the laugh.

Tuesday: Once again,I got her to laugh, not quite as much as yeserday, but still alot.

Wednesday: Not very good. I said somethings during lunch she found very amusing (In a good way). Later, she lacked showing me eye-contact, and was really saying the bare-minimum she could say to me.

Thursday: We didn't talk quite as much, but as you can see, I make her laugh alot. I did make her laugh some. She seemed in a better mood.

Friday: She wasn't at shool. She had an extracurricular activity event. It was a tournament, and she loves going to those. I thought it might put her in a good mood for the weekend.

I find it hard to conversate with someone in a hallway at school. You can't talk about as much stuff, because there is always a deadline to when you can talk with them. I find we have far better conversations when we eat lunch, because we don't have to really finish what we're saying in a minute.

I was thinking about calling her on Saturday about 1-ish because I heard her say she wanted to see Blades Of Glory. What do you think?

Don't ask for relationship help at the OT.TheHimura

Alright. First piece of advice. You cannot get a girl to like you. Second piece of advice. You are thinking too much, stop thinking and analyzing every situation. Third piece of advice. Swallow your pride and just tell her how you feel, the worst that could happen is she could say "no".foxhound_fox

well 1st off,isshe hot?Zap-O-Matic

[QUOTE="Zap-O-Matic"]well 1st off,isshe hot?Carlos_Santana

[QUOTE="foxhound_fox"]Alright. First piece of advice. You cannot get a girl to like you. Second piece of advice. You are thinking too much, stop thinking and analyzing every situation. Third piece of advice. Swallow your pride and just tell her how you feel, the worst that could happen is she could say "no".Carlos_Santana

[QUOTE="foxhound_fox"]Alright. First piece of advice. You cannot get a girl to like you. Second piece of advice. You are thinking too much, stop thinking and analyzing every situation. Third piece of advice. Swallow your pride and just tell her how you feel, the worst that could happen is she could say "no".Carlos_Santana

Have you ever told a girl how you really feel?Carlos_Santana

Ok, here's probaly the best OT advice you're gonna get, and I'm gonna give it fairly short

First she needs to know you have interest in her w/out you blurting it out.  This can be done a number of ways,  It can be compliments here and there, or sexual inuendoes depending on what type of people you are, but don't really suck-up to the point where you are submissive to her, and don't be sexual to the point where you seem like some type of devient.

Now it's very important for the next step that she understands you like her, but not in any obvious way.  Next is you ask her out, because she's had time to think about the situation she should give you a pretty straightforward answer (circumstances pending).

Ok, here's probaly the best OT advice you're gonna get, and I'm gonna give it fairly short

First she needs to know you have interest in her w/out you blurting it out.  This can be done a number of ways,  It can be compliments here and there, or sexual inuendoes depending on what type of people you are, but don't really suck-up to the point where you are submissive to her, and don't be sexual to the point where you seem like some type of devient.

Now it's very important for the next step that she understands you like her, but not in any obvious way.  Next is you ask her out, because she's had time to think about the situation she should give you a pretty straightforward answer (circumstances pending).

jrhawk42

[QUOTE="jrhawk42"]

Ok, here's probaly the best OT advice you're gonna get, and I'm gonna give it fairly short

First she needs to know you have interest in her w/out you blurting it out. This can be done a number of ways, It can be compliments here and there, or sexual inuendoes depending on what type of people you are, but don't really suck-up to the point where you are submissive to her, and don't be sexual to the point where you seem like some type of devient.

Now it's very important for the next step that she understands you like her, but not in any obvious way. Next is you ask her out, because she's had time to think about the situation she should give you a pretty straightforward answer (circumstances pending).

LJS9502_basic

Not a good idea because if she's not prepared for him to ask her out she's not going to give him an good answer (she could say yes when she means no, or vice versa or she could even give a vauge response).  One thing I've learned about women is don't suprise women, drop hints, leave clues, make it obvious.  Women like to be precognisant, and most women aren't very good at the on the spot stuff. 

He might of already taken the first step but I've got no clue to that, and you don't want to try to jump from plutonic to courting it's just to dramatic of a jump.

Not a good idea because if she's not prepared for him to ask her out she's not going to give him an good answer (she could say yes when she means no, or vice versa or she could even give a vauge response).  One thing I've learned about women is don't suprise women, drop hints, leave clues, make it obvious.  Women like to be precognisant, and most women aren't very good at the on the spot stuff. 

He might of already taken the first step but I've got no clue to that, and you don't want to try to jump from plutonic to courting it's just to dramatic of a jump.

jrhawk42

Go for it, if she says no its not the end of the world, if she says yes your in there :D

Both things have happened to me plenty of times, its better to know if it could have been instead of not knowing at all.  Trust me.

Go on Carlos, I believe in you!!!

Dude saying that was so not cliched.

:D 

Absolutely untrue. If she's interested she will say yes....I've gone from friendship to dating. Not impossible to do dude. By now she has decided if she wants to go out with him or not. All that will happen if he waits is she'll find someone else. If she isn't interested by now....she isn't going to change her mind anytime soon. LIke I said....she already knows the answer to his question....it's up to him to find it out and there's only one way to do that. Or he could take your approach and regret his decision.LJS9502_basic

you're assuming she's made up her mind, I'm assuming she hasn't give the issue anythought.  My method ensures her mind is made up, covering both possibilities while yours sticks to your assumption.  Any logical person can see that's not the best option. 

[QUOTE="LJS9502_basic"]

Absolutely untrue. If she's interested she will say yes....I've gone from friendship to dating. Not impossible to do dude. By now she has decided if she wants to go out with him or not. All that will happen if he waits is she'll find someone else. If she isn't interested by now....she isn't going to change her mind anytime soon. LIke I said....she already knows the answer to his question....it's up to him to find it out and there's only one way to do that. Or he could take your approach and regret his decision.jrhawk42

you're assuming she's made up her mind, I'm assuming she hasn't give the issue anythought.  My method ensures her mind is made up, covering both possibilities while yours sticks to your assumption.  Any logical person can see that's not the best option. 

I hate giving advice, but whatever. I would not advise asking her out just yet. It might catch her off guard and make things awkward between you two at lunch, and possibly diminish any future chance with her. You need to make a transition from "occasional friend who she talks to at lunch" to "friend who she can hang out with without feeling weird." Find out what she's doing and act interested (like going to the mall, or hanging out with friends), but don't invite yourself or ask to come along. Just keep showing interest and she likes you as a person even the slightest, she'll probably extend some common courtesy and ask if you'd like to come. Do this a few times, just hang out with her on a casual level, with friends around. Don't give her the wrong idea, and help her to get to know you better. Once she feels comfortable, then you can start spending time with her away from the friends. Keep it casual as usual, though. Don't make it seem like the first shot you have at being alone you want to grope her or hit on her. Don't keep it up for too long, though, since when/if you tell her how you feel later, the longer you spent time with her alone, the more you seem like a creepy stalker. :P When you're both comfortable at that level, then by all means, ask her out. :) Good luck.

 And like LSJ..whatever... said, it isn't impossible to go from friendship to relationship.  That's how I got into my current relationship, and so far its lasted much longer than my previous relationship which started at dating, rather than a friendship.

You assume wrong. Girls know if they like someone or not. Your method is hang back and wait while she finds someone interested in her. My method works....LJS9502_basic

just cause you say it doesn't make it true, I suggest that if you are going to continue to agrue your point you'd better be coming up with some reasons why.

You've also misinterpreted my method, my method is to show your interest by not making it blatent (like directly telling her), this doesn't take much more than a week if he's seeing her at lunch everyday.  By the end of the week he should be to the point where he can ask her out and she'll be prepared for it.

Like everything in life asking a girl out takes good planning, try to wing it and you'll fail (not guaranteed but the odds do increase), procrastinate and somebody else will steal your idea (if it's a good one).  You need a swift and well thought out plan to increase your chances of being successful.

[QUOTE="LJS9502_basic"]You assume wrong. Girls know if they like someone or not. Your method is hang back and wait while she finds someone interested in her. My method works....jrhawk42

just cause you say it doesn't make it true, I suggest that if you are going to continue to agrue your point you'd better be coming up with some reasons why.

You've also misinterpreted my method, my method is to show your interest by not making it blatent (like directly telling her), this doesn't take much more than a week if he's seeing her at lunch everyday.  By the end of the week he should be to the point where he can ask her out and she'll be prepared for it.

Like everything in life asking a girl out takes good planning, try to wing it and you'll fail (not guaranteed but the odds do increase), procrastinate and somebody else will steal your idea (if it's a good one).  You need a swift and well thought out plan to increase your chances of being successful.

I know you probably think "Don't ask for Relationship help at the OT", but I am not asking how to get a girl to like me. I think that this just requires a person with good social skills in general.

Okay, so I know this girl. We're good friends. And I have been wanting to develop a relationship with her. We eat lunch with 2 other people and talk twice after that usually. Here's how the conversations went throughout the week:

Monday: During lunch, for a couple minutes it was just us two. We got to talking and I got her laughing pretty hard. After lunch I told her a story about my weekend, and I got her to laugh very hard and she even thanked me for the laugh.

Tuesday: Once again,I got her to laugh, not quite as much as yeserday, but still alot.

Wednesday: Not very good. I said somethings during lunch she found very amusing (In a good way). Later, she lacked showing me eye-contact, and was really saying the bare-minimum she could say to me.

Thursday: We didn't talk quite as much, but as you can see, I make her laugh alot. I did make her laugh some. She seemed in a better mood.

Friday: She wasn't at shool. She had an extracurricular activity event. It was a tournament, and she loves going to those. I thought it might put her in a good mood for the weekend.

I find it hard to conversate with someone in a hallway at school. You can't talk about as much stuff, because there is always a deadline to when you can talk with them. I find we have far better conversations when we eat lunch, because we don't have to really finish what we're saying in a minute.

I was thinking about calling her on Saturday about 1-ish because I heard her say she wanted to see Blades Of Glory. What do you think?

Carlos_Santana

I got dumped today, I'm in the same situation as you. I'm gonna wait till my braces are off and my teeth get cleaned by pro's. Then I'll ask her out. Oh yeah, go call her and see Blades of Glory, that movie looks hilarious.

do it...and nobody's gonna get mad at you for this topic...you ARE the OT:Psteppinrazor88