I've gotten myself into a very bad situation with a girl and im really unsure what I should do. In college I was living in a house with some people and although I got one well with them I got a very severe bout of depression while I was there and obviously that pretty much so caused everyone in the house to turn against me so I had to leave. However one of the girls there had a friend in another house. Now that person was really nice to me and did talk to me about my depression and in general made me feel better. Now that i've moved out i've tried to go see her a few times but i wasn't able to find her. I texted her and asked her if she would talk to me and when she agreed I said I was sorry to her for talking about it which I felt was unfair on her. Yesterday I got very drunk and got quite depressed and texted her that I was extremely sorry for what I did and that I wouldn't speak to her again. However the next morning I realised what I did and texted her to say sorry and that I didn't mean to say that, I got no reply and then later on I found her and told her again im sorry and she said okay. A few hours later I got a text from her friend telling me that she's becoming scared of me and that she gets it that im sorry and I should drop it. Now im unsure of what I should do because I don't if I should just leave her alone all together or should I try talking to her and pretend nothing happened.
I've gotten myself into a very bad situation with a girl and im really unsure what I should do. In college I was living in a house with some people and although I got one well with them I got a very severe bout of depression while I was there and obviously that pretty much so caused everyone in the house to turn against me so I had to leave. However one of the girls there had a friend in another house. Now that person was really nice to me and did talk to me about my depression and in general made me feel better. Now that i've moved out i've tried to go see her a few times but i wasn't able to find her. I texted her and asked her if she would talk to me and when she agreed I said I was sorry to her for talking about it which I felt was unfair on her. Yesterday I got very drunk and got quite depressed and texted her that I was extremely sorry for what I did and that I wouldn't speak to her again. However the next morning I realised what I did and texted her to say sorry and that I didn't mean to say that, I got no reply and then later on I found her and told her again im sorry and she said okay. A few hours later I got a text from her friend telling me that she's becoming scared of me and that she gets it that im sorry and I should drop it. Now im unsure of what I should do because I don't if I should just leave her alone all together or should I try talking to her and pretend nothing happened. Trooperdx3117
No offense, but I don't blame her. It sounds like a lot of drama to me.
Text her that your sorry again? Seriously though I would be a little creeped out too. Stop texting her for awhile or if you do suggest you guys go do something together. Preferably something where you don't end up saying "I'm sorry" again.
uhhh drop it. you've already told her sorry like 3 times, that's enough. i had a situation like you though, i got drunk one night and got really emotional, except i didn't end up with some girl being scared of me :P
I guess this is one of those times where expletives are usually required. I understand I have no one to blame but myself, I suppose it wouldn't be good idea to just go a few months before I talk to her again. We had become quite good friends admittedly before this happened so do you think this gives me any scope at all.
I guess this is one of those times where expletives are usually required. I understand I have no one to blame but myself, I suppose it wouldn't be good idea to just go a few months before I talk to her again. We had become quite good friends admittedly before this happened so do you think this gives me any scope at all.Trooperdx3117
start hanging out with people she talks to and act normal and she might begin to talk to you but dont expect this to happen very soon
Yeah, just give her some space (and time) and eventually she might feel comfortable enough to talk to you again. Bugging her about will just bother her so much you might just end up with a restraining order instead of her friendship. I've had the misfortune of making a fool out of myself by sending out an apology when it really wasn't necessary. Sure you feel uncomfortable and embarrassed about it, but leaving it alone will let you and the other person forget about it that much quicker. Keep bringing it up and you'll keep reminding her of "that weird guy who won't let it go."
[QUOTE="Trooperdx3117"]I guess this is one of those times where expletives are usually required. I understand I have no one to blame but myself, I suppose it wouldn't be good idea to just go a few months before I talk to her again. We had become quite good friends admittedly before this happened so do you think this gives me any scope at all.mirriorman
start hanging out with people she talks to and act normal and she might begin to talk to you but dont expect this to happen very soon Unfrotunately that wouldn't work as the people she usually hangs out with are the people in my old house and they hate me anyway. That sounds like some good advice elblanquito_81 hopefully that will work
Just stop caring about things. A few years ago I was the same way, and I made myself stop caring about drama and other worthless things in life. I'm much happier and I think you would be too if you did the same.
Just drop it and move on. If she had to have mutual friend to tell you she's scare of you then, sorry bud, it's a done deal.
I've heard in some rare occasions where people do reconcile after such incidents but, I wouldn't hold out too much hope for it. Just back off and take it for what's it worth.
How could someone be "scared" of someone for apologizing too much? I mean seriously, it's one thing to be scared of the the guy who dresses in a all blacka nd talks about death all the timew, but scared of a friend for saying your sorry? I just don't understand, maybe I'm brave or something, but this sounds a little rediculous. On both your parts. And let it go, it's over.
I get really snappy when people keep apologising. It's really irritating to be constantly reminded of what someone did wrong. Saying sorry is supposed to mean that you regret what you did, and you won't do it again, not that someone has to smile and be nice to you again. If you don't follow through on your apology then it makes your words seem empty.
Dude, stop texting her seriously Try to find something to make your depression go away, maybe go to a club or something? And never talk to her again unless she talks to you, and if she ever talks to you, dont say you are sorry, just act like nothing happend and try to be *cool*
I appreciate the advice to get help but I have already gone to a pyschologist so my depression isn't really such an issue anymore except when im drunk (Of course alcohol is a depressant so its kind of understandable) but I do find it confusing why she would be scared by me apologising, I can understand if she's annoyed by it but why scared.
I appreciate the advice to get help but I have already gone to a pyschologist so my depression isn't really such an issue anymore except when im drunk (Of course alcohol is a depressant so its kind of understandable) but I do find it confusing why she would be scared by me apologising, I can understand if she's annoyed by it but why scared.Trooperdx3117
well stop drinking duh and as for why she is scared i rember seeing something on the news about some depressed ex boyfriend snapping and stabbed his ex and her boyfriend killing the boyfriend
Here is something that will help yall: Don't drink. You are depressed and you drink.... an alcoholic in making. Once you are addicted it is very hard to get away. Just trying to save your life. :)
Drop it and move on. You're relationship is over with her if she's scared of you.
Pirate700
Agreed. I mean it would seem that if you guys had a stronger relationship to begin with, forgiveness would be a lot quicker and easier, but this does not seem like it.
I've gotten myself into a very bad situation with a girl and im really unsure what I should do. In college I was living in a house with some people and although I got one well with them I got a very severe bout of depression while I was there and obviously that pretty much so caused everyone in the house to turn against me so I had to leave. However one of the girls there had a friend in another house. Now that person was really nice to me and did talk to me about my depression and in general made me feel better. Now that i've moved out i've tried to go see her a few times but i wasn't able to find her. I texted her and asked her if she would talk to me and when she agreed I said I was sorry to her for talking about it which I felt was unfair on her. Yesterday I got very drunk and got quite depressed and texted her that I was extremely sorry for what I did and that I wouldn't speak to her again. However the next morning I realised what I did and texted her to say sorry and that I didn't mean to say that, I got no reply and then later on I found her and told her again im sorry and she said okay. A few hours later I got a text from her friend telling me that she's becoming scared of me and that she gets it that im sorry and I should drop it. Now im unsure of what I should do because I don't if I should just leave her alone all together or should I try talking to her and pretend nothing happened. Trooperdx3117
Erm... You are scary? This is a very awkward situation youve gotten yourself into... Just let it slide ;)
[QUOTE="Trooperdx3117"]I've gotten myself into a very bad situation with a girl and im really unsure what I should do. In college I was living in a house with some people and although I got one well with them I got a very severe bout of depression while I was there and obviously that pretty much so caused everyone in the house to turn against me so I had to leave. However one of the girls there had a friend in another house. Now that person was really nice to me and did talk to me about my depression and in general made me feel better. Now that i've moved out i've tried to go see her a few times but i wasn't able to find her. I texted her and asked her if she would talk to me and when she agreed I said I was sorry to her for talking about it which I felt was unfair on her. Yesterday I got very drunk and got quite depressed and texted her that I was extremely sorry for what I did and that I wouldn't speak to her again. However the next morning I realised what I did and texted her to say sorry and that I didn't mean to say that, I got no reply and then later on I found her and told her again im sorry and she said okay. A few hours later I got a text from her friend telling me that she's becoming scared of me and that she gets it that im sorry and I should drop it. Now im unsure of what I should do because I don't if I should just leave her alone all together or should I try talking to her and pretend nothing happened. chaplainDMK
Erm... You are scary? This is a very awkward situation youve gotten yourself into... Just let it slide ;)
I suppose, really its more so that im not very good with people so I probably come across as a little creepy although its definitely not intentional. Anyway im definitely giving up alcohol from now on and will get myself sorted out and if she's willing to talk to me again in a few months then great and if not then i'll just have to move on.
It seems to me like you smothered the poor girl. It happens to the best of us, just gotta be able to take hints and change your ways. Don't get too emotional with a girl that you look desperate or pathetic, it comes off as creepy, like you're unstable or something. Just be more relaxed and try not to share so much personal feeling with people, it comes off too strong.
That's exactly what he SHOULDN'T do. If you act more casual and detached, and DON'T contact her, she'll be wondering over time about how you are and would try to initiate contact with you if she's interested. That is the best move right now. DO NOT contact her and act desperate, needy or clingy. Doing so instantly turns off ANY girl, and you will lose out. You've got to control yourself, and get on with life ;)
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