Here are my choices:
The chronic hand raiser: There's always one of these people in any given class and they are always full of questions. Not thought provoking philosophical questions, but painfully stupid questions that could be easily be answered if the chronic hand raiser simply used the time it takes them to put up their hand time and time again to read the syllabus. And if reading is too hard (which is probably true in this person's case), the teacher usually answers the chronic hand raisers questions in the first five minutes of the class. But the chronic hand raiser doesn't hear it because they are too busy formulating questions in their head. By the time the teacher's fake smile is starting to falter, and everybody is laughing or rolling their eyes, you start to think the chronic hand raiser asks so many questions because they like the sound of their own voice, and lacking something intelligent to say, a question, no matter how dumb, will have to do. Or maybe this guy is so dependent on others for guidance that his mom still cuts his steak.
The slacker who always manages to get put in YOUR group: This guy has pretty much scraped his way through college through other people's labor. He doesn't do crap, but everybody in the group is too nice to tell the teacher that he's a lazy SOB. While everybody else is discussing the project or writing stuff down or looking stuff up, this guy is on his iphone, looking at his facebook page or making plans via text message to get very very wasted that night. If he's not doing that, he's staring into space thinking about getting wasted. And if he's not doing that, he's taking a bathroom break, one that lasts long enough that when he comes back, everbody else in the group is done working for the day. And then when the project comes back to the group with a A, this douchebag slaps you on the back and says, "We did a good job." And you're thinking, "WTF? You didn't do anything!"
The classroom debater: If you want to get a feel for how annoying this guy is, take some of most argumentative posters on OT but imagine they are in a classroom and the person they are arguing with is the professor. Although this guy is fresh out of high school, he knows everything about everything. He will gladly interrupt the flow of a lecture to argue with a point the professor made and he'll do it with an expectant look on his face, as if he expects everybody to applaud and copy his brilliant argument down into their notes. Usually this guy argues semantics because arguing in any other way would require that he knows what the hell he's talking about. After all, this guy is fully aware he doesn't know anything about the subject and argues with the hope that there are some impressionable people in the classroom that will give him props. Maybe he'll even get laid!
The activist: This person is so deeply into their political causes that they forget how to act like a normal person. You could say that you had a hamburger for lunch to your buddy and this person is ready to argue about the immorality of eating meat. Even if you don't want to argue with them, they will press the issue, hoping that it will become the class's new topic of discussion. When the professor finally has had enough, this person sits in their seat, looking on edge. You can tell they still want to argue, but they are part of too many student organizations to ruin their reputation by continuing even after the teacher told them to stop. To compensate for this, after class, they'll say something about your unacceptable behavior to their friends, but loud enough so that the horrible meat eater will hear it.
The amazingly irrelevant human blog: No matter what the subject, this person always feels the need to inject details of their personal life into the class discussion, no matter how irelevant. If this guy or gal saw Harry Potter before class, all of a sudden the teacher's most recent question becomes a perfectly opportune moment to tell everybody! So, when the art teacher asks a question about Nazi Germany, the human blog raises their hand and explains how the Ministry of Magic under Voldemort has parallels to WWII and that she thought of this because she just saw Harry Potter with her friend Jenna and there was this guy in the theatre who told Jenna to shut up and Jenna got into a shouting match with him in the theatre and blah blah blah blah. At the end of these narratives, the class looks confused, like they just got teleported to Oz. The human blog made sure that everybody's not in Kansas anymore.
The chronically hungover: This person got really really drunk last night and he has a terrible hangover. You know this because he is telling EVERYBODY, even people that were at the party too. He talks about how wasted he got as if nobody else has ever gotten drunk before. The way this guy talks about having gotten drunk, you'd think he found a new type of shroom or something. Why else would he be talking about throwing up and accidently kissing one of his buddies as if it's a grand adventure and not the same crap that he does every weekend?
What are your choices?
BTW, feel free to mention types other than ones I mentioned.
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