1) Force Jack Thompson to play Double Dragons III to the end, followed by Ninjabread Man, followed by Big Rigs.
2) Allow freedom of religions in all countries, and to all people.
3) Place Osama Bin Laden, George Bush, Dick Cheney, and Soulja Boy in their own separate hamster wheel chasing after a block of cheese (for soulja boy, a can of cheese).
4) End the suffering in Darfur by sending all the refugees to a nice resort spa in puerto rico.
5) Shape the moon to look like my face.
6) Place a minimum on how many times a rapper can mention bling in a song, as well as limit how many songs mention bling at all in a year.
7) Place a set of standards that rock bands must meet before they are allowed to get a record label (i don't know about you, but i'm getting tired of these emo bands popping up like rabbits in the springtime).
8) Give the members of Led Zeppelin each their own personal castle.
9) Marry my girlfriend and give her all she pleases.
10) Entertain myself by watching Bill Gates and Donald Trump FIGHT over a stock of my company....which inhabits the entire world's economy (muahahaha)
11) Sleep in a giant comfy bed the size of central park.
12) Create a floating island which contains a colloseum, in which world criminals fight each other for victory...only to be eaten by a swarm of yellow jacket wasps, lions, or wookies (depending on what mood i'm in).
13) Prove the existance of God, but say religion is wrong and laugh at people trying to yell at me.
14) End world hunger by placing a restaurant (with free food) every 3 blocks.
15) Sleep.
16) Fight Chuck Norris...and win.
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