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Jlao1

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#1 Jlao1
Member since 2008 • 165 Posts

In your opinion:

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?

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chessmaster1989

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#2 chessmaster1989
Member since 2008 • 30203 Posts

I think we have a new candidate for the stupidest topic ever... :|

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The_Sand_Man

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#3 The_Sand_Man
Member since 2008 • 6788 Posts

I think we have a new candidate for the stupidest topic ever... :|

chessmaster1989

It gets my vote.:|

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Pirate700

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#4 Pirate700
Member since 2008 • 46465 Posts

Wednesday.

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Bloodaxe726

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#5 Bloodaxe726
Member since 2007 • 7903 Posts

The correct answer is however much it felt like.

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raylewisnfl52

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#6 raylewisnfl52
Member since 2005 • 7146 Posts
Its Easter tomorrow
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fraz1776

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#8 fraz1776
Member since 2006 • 2269 Posts

Seventeen.

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cheetfreak

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#9 cheetfreak
Member since 2005 • 1986 Posts

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Gamer4Iife

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#10 Gamer4Iife
Member since 2008 • 6010 Posts
Yes. Do I win? :o
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Pirate700

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#11 Pirate700
Member since 2008 • 46465 Posts

Yes. Do I win? :o Gamer4Iife
No.

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horgen

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#12 horgen  Moderator
Member since 2006 • 127728 Posts

Wednesday.

Pirate700
It's Thursday. Anyone can see that :P
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McJugga

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#13 McJugga
Member since 2007 • 9453 Posts

think that the woodchuck could chuck as much wood as he wanted! By the way what is a wood chuck? Is it like a gopher? This is difficult to question answer. The amount of wood that woodchucks would chuck on a given day varies greatly with the individual woodchuck. According to a Wall Street Journal article, New York State wildlife expert Richard Thomas found that a woodchuck could chuck around 35 cubic feet of dirt in the course of digging a burrow. Thomas reasoned that if a woodchuck could chuck wood, he would chuck an amount equal to 700 pounds.

Some say it depends on three factors:

* The woodchuck's desire to chuck said wood.

* The woodchuck's need to chuck the aforementioned wood.

* The woodchuck's ability to chuck the wood.

Others say:

* He would chuck, he would, as much as he could, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

* If he could chuck wood, the woodchuck would chuck as much as he could!

* A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

* A woodchuck would chuck all the wood that the woodchuck would chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

* If a woodchuck could chuck wood, he would and should chuck wood. But if woodchucks can't chuck wood, they shouldn't and wouldn't chuck wood. Though were I a woodchuck, and I chucked wood, I would chuck wood with the best woodchucks that chucked wood.

* If a woodchuck could chuck wood, then s/he'd chuck all the wood, s/he'd chuck and chuck and chuck and chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

* It would chuck the amount of wood that she sells seashells on the seashore divided by how many pickles Peter Piper picks.

* One quarter of a sycamore if you give him a quarter for every quarter of the sycamore he cut.

* It might depend on how many female woodchucks were present. Or, it could depend on whether the woodchuck's mother-in-law was around or not. If she was, he'd be chucking all day. If not, he'd be watching the football game.

* Some maintain that woodchucks could not and would not chuck wood at all.

* It depends on how good his dentures are!

* A woodchuck, would chuck, as much wood, as a woodchuck, could chuck, If a woodchuck could chuck wood. But unfortunately, woodchucks do not chuck wood.

* About 5.72 fluid litres of wood

* About as many boards as the Mongol hoards would hoard if the Mongol hordes did hoard boards.

* Um....... 23????

* Tons. More than you can count. Honestly. No one can chuck more would than a woodchuck.

* If the woodchucks name was Maurice, then it could chuck all the wood that it wants to. However, if its name is Frank, no chucking would be for it.

* Due to the average size of a wood chuck and the general density of wood (not including cork) if a wood chuck could chuck wood it would probably get through about 6.573 pounds per day, assuming the wood chuck is functioning correctly.

* Using the formula: (W + I) * C where W = the constant of wood, which is well known to be 61, as agreed in many scientific circles. I = the variable in this equation, and stands for the word "if" from the original problem. As there are three circumstances, with 0 equaling the chance that the woodchuck cannot chuck wood, 1 being the theory that the woodchuck can chuck wood but chooses not to, and 2 standing for the probability that the woodchuck can and will chuck wood, we clearly must choose 2 for use in this equation. C = the constant of Chuck Norris, whose presence in any problem involving the word chuck must there, is well known to equal 1.1 of any known being, therefore the final part of this calculation is 1.1. As is clear, this appears to give the answer of (61 + 2) * 1.1 = (63) * 1.1 = 69.3. However, Chuck Norris' awesome roundhouse kick declares that all decimal points cannot be used in formulas such as this, and so it must be rounded to the final solution of 69 units of wood.

How Chuck Norris got involved

A woodchuck would only chuck as much would as Chuck Norris would allow it to, because the woodchuck shares Chuck's name. Therefore, Chuck must punish it and make it chuck as much wood as Chuck can. So, a woodchuck would chuck as much wood as Chuck could.

None cuz a wood chuck cant chuck wood! :P

Approximately 3.9675 pounds every 5.6843 seconds. So there.

2.865 lbs every 11.3686 Seconds?

About 15 pounds a minute.

i speak differently i say WHAT DOES YOUR QUESTION HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING! and btw its 84% lol

it depends how good his dentures are!!!

As much as he needed to be satisfied

But the true jokey answer, as told by my grandfather is: As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

a woodchuck would chuck all the wood he could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood


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Agent_305

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#14 Agent_305
Member since 2007 • 758 Posts

May be daft but it made me loool! :P

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b3yondstupidity

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#15 b3yondstupidity
Member since 2007 • 12500 Posts
Chuck Norris of course.
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vitriolboy

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#16 vitriolboy
Member since 2005 • 4356 Posts

It's all down to a complex formula

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k16campbell

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#17 k16campbell
Member since 2008 • 660 Posts

I dont really know... about 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288-ish. I dont think wood chucks like pi...:?

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noONEbreaks1715

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#18 noONEbreaks1715
Member since 2009 • 139 Posts
I think enought wood to the wood chuck chuck all the wood he wants to chuck or he couldnt chuck any wood anymore.
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Infinite-Zr0

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#19 Infinite-Zr0
Member since 2003 • 13284 Posts
It could chuck wood until the mods ban his account.
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Puscifer_No1

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#20 Puscifer_No1
Member since 2006 • 2769 Posts

None cause it irrelivent! :x

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noONEbreaks1715

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#21 noONEbreaks1715
Member since 2009 • 139 Posts

None cause it irrelivent! :x

Puscifer_No1
And the sense of humor?... The bomb has been pla....
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DoMiNiC147

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#22 DoMiNiC147
Member since 2008 • 984 Posts
It really scares me that this got 2 pages.