Ok whats going on, bottlenecking or something?

mobo - http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16813130247

ram - http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16820227346

Also running a phenom ii x4 955 oced to 3.5ghz

Ive turned off cool n quiet.

windows 7 64bit ultimate

First problem is my cpu speed... my friend with the same cpu got a 17.3seconds for 1m on superpi stock with same os, where with my 3.5ghz i only get 19.97. So my cpu isnt as fast...

And then when ever i extract something, my ram usage goes up to 95%, and even after extraction is done, it stays about 95% for 5 minutes...

Whats going on, is my mobo a bottleneck or something?

Is the CPU overclock stable (what stress testing have you done), is the Ram stable at the OC your running too.

What PC does your friend have?

what RAM speeds your friend running, yours is running1066 on DDR3, thats quite slow to be honest. memory standard for DDR3 is1600 and 1333 usually.

CPU sounds about right, my 955 clocked at 3.4GHz takes 20.4 seconds on 1m super pi. That RAM usage does seem strange though, have you tried to run a mem86? If not, that would be my first course of action.