Screw numerical scores. We don't need 'em.
If I was to say that I think Grand Theft Auto IV is a great game, many of you would probably agree.
If I was to then say that I think Grand Theft Auto IV is deserving of the score "8.5", nothing more, nothing less, many of you would probably disagree. Strongly. Loudly. And with torches and pointy sticks. The same among you that agreed with me that GTA IV is a great game would deride me for saying it deserved an 8.5, despite the fact that, by official GS standards, a game scored with either an 8.0 or an 8.5 is "Great". I would point that out, and the entire thread would suddenly be filled with confusion, and anger, and lots of people having a hard time finding their bearings.
And that, ladies (doubtful) and gentlemen (again, doubtful) brings us to the question at hand: Why do numerical scores exist?
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I understand that yes, sometimes, you just want to find out if a game is worth playing or not without wallowing through an ass load of rehashed examinations of whether or not a game runs at 29.7 or 30 frames per second, but really, must a quick summary of a review be numerical?
Couldn't reviews just use neat little boxes of words in the upper right hand corner of the page to tell you the bottom line? I mean, you know, just a nice little bar of text superimposed over a painstakingly well drawn pair of fanboy imagined night elf breasts, or something like that? Just a little blurb saying "buy this game, it's badass" or "stay away, it's produced by Dave Jaffe", I mean really, how hard could it be?
I mean damn, most websites already have some sort of hyper-interactive, multi-layered, bright colored, moving slideshow, menu interface, how ****ing hard could it be to put a summary box up there somewhere?
And why in the hell wouldn't people be happy with that? What, are words like "excellent" or "astonishing" or "incredible" or "Tim Schafer title" not enough to tell us that a game is worth playing? Do we really need 10s and 9s and 8.8s and 97.764%, to tell us about a game's quality?
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The way I see it, numbers bring us nothing but trouble.
A game scores a 9.8, and another game on another platform scores a 9.9 (and by the way, 9.9 is 99%. How the **** can a game be 99% perfect? :| ), and suddenly its all fire and brimstone and ownage, and every fanboy this side of the atmosphere is going bat **** crazy and urinating all over the forums.
And 10s REALLY create a lot of trouble, particularly on sites like IGN that have that extra decimal **** going on. The question then becomes, "well, this game is obviously better than GTA IV or OoT or Soul Calibur, but we've already blown our load in the 10 department, so I guess we're ****ed. Can we go to 11?"
It's what I like to call the 10 corner. As soon as you've backed into it, you have actually backed onto it and are very, very, effed as a critic.
And then, when another critic, maybe an even MORE honest one, gives the game an 8.5, everyone accuses him of just wanting the attention, like he just strapped on a pair of stilletos and went prancing about mass, tugging ties, and dropping numbers.
And then people start saying "oh man, this guy is WAY OFF the critical average. Totally screwed the pooch there."
Really? What happened to honest opinions?
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If we dropped the number **** and just started saying what we liked and disliked about particular games, the aformentioned crap would stop, and the world would be much better off. Or at least this section of the world. You know, System Wars. :roll:
If anything, this place would become more interesting. Fanboys everywhere would have to start popping open dictionaries to find words with which to qualify their opinions, and who knows, maybe on their way to the library they would see a female or two, and realise that the pr0nzors they've been watching is actually not CGI.
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