i never should have bought that game

User Rating: 2.5 | Perfect Dark Zero X360
before the game came out, i just knew i wouldn't like it. the fact that there was no jump gave me the gut feeling that i wouldn't like it. the people who were chosen to play a demo of it during mtv's debaucle last year were showing a fake enthusiasm for the game. reviewers of the game couldn't agree as to how it would pan it even after playing it. but still, i wanted it to be good, so that i would like it.

unfortunately, i walked into best buy, put pdz in my hand, paid for it, walked out of the store, drove home, and put the game in my 360. my first impressions were, "OMG, this chic singing in the title animation is awful, but that's ok, it's just the opening credits. the game isn't based solely on the merits of a tone deaf chic singing in the title animation."

so, i selected my first mission with the hardest difficulty possible. i was a bit new with the controls of the game and had to get used to them for a while. my first problem was the aiming - no matter what i did to the settings, i couldn't get a comfortable control on the aiming in the game. and since i couldn't successfully master the aiming, i had to start over on an easier setting. this made the game a little more enjoyable... for a short time.

once i was free of the aiming nuisance, i started noticing problems i was having with other aspects of the game. the cover became annoying. as much as i like the idea of cover, it doesn't work well in the game. it has a lot of downfalls. for one, you can't just walk up to wall or other object and press a to automatically take cover. you have to wait for the "press a for cover" to appear on the screen. so, with that you can't take cover whenever or wherever you like, just when the game will allow it. and with that said, when you take cover, you might be taking cover to the left or right of an object, leaving you completely open to take fire from the left or right side. awesome!!! and you know what, even the cover isn't very real, it's a cool concept, but you can aim before you pop out of your cover. that makes it a little too easy to kill others. more skill would be required to aim after you pop out of cover.

the texturing in the game was out of control. it's as if a beginning animation student was let loose on the texturing. bump maps were overused and overexagerated. railings don't look like a slim jim's wrinkly outer skin. surfaces appeared to be coated in a shiny glaze as if the floors, walls, and rocks were covered in a thin layer of ice. walls, ceilings, furniture and guns all had the specularity of a polished aluminum wheel. overall, the textures could have been better. they went too far overboard. instead of a professionally done game, it had the appearance of a game that had a very green design team working on it.

the lighting in the rooftop getaway was about the best thing i saw in the game. it gave the feel of high dynamic range lighting. the only part i didn't like was the rays of light coming through the overhead openings and windows. the rays edges were too sharp instead of being diffused.

i wasn't impressed with the multiplayer at all. that's all i have to say about that.

the breaking point for me was on the snow level. after passing through the short tunnel into the area with the guards walking around and the guards in the towers, i gave up. here's how it went down. i passed through the small tunnel after killing a guard. to the right were some stationary objects (perhaps they were rocks or ice or something of the likes). i moved over behind them to take cover. the guards started shooting at me, so as soon as i got the "press a to cover," i did just that. but i didn't take cover. i was still in first person mode. but wait, i couldn't move! what the?!? so i hit "a" again and i could move. i was given the "press a to cover" again, so i tried again. again the same thing. i couldn't move and i was stuck in first person. meanwhile, the guards are really pounding on me with the guns. so, i restarted the level. several times. each time the sme thing. so, that ended my pdz experience.

pdz found its way to ebay, and i made all but 3 dollars back.

so, before i end this review, let me say, "kudos," to rare for getting it done by launch. let me also say, "thanks for making a crummy game, rare, and you can stick it where the sun doesn't shine."