[Jordan is banging computer keys in frustration] Nigel: "Please evacuate the keyboard area." [when asked why he became an ME] Bug: "I wanted to be a children doctor but little kids hated me." Det. Cruz: "You and I are on the same street, you know. Just different sides." Jordan: "That doesn't make us pals. So far - not a big fan." Det. Cruz: "Don't worry. I grow on people." Jordan: "So does fungus." Jordan: [to Garret] "It's like you always tell me. The dead bodies are easy. It's the alive ones that get more complicated." Woody: "Stay in the car." Jordan: "What exactly in our past makes you think I'll do that?" Jordan: "You're not really going to put me on that leash are you?" Macy: "You'd just chew through it." Nigel: "So if I killed my husband, where would I stash the body?" Jordan: "If you killed your husband you'd have to start in the closet." Woody: "What do we got?" Garrett: "Well, since they called for a medical examiner and homicide detective, my guess is a body." Woody: "Is sarcasm a prerequisite for being an ME? Garrett: It helps." Woody: "Looks like man vs. city bus. You can guess the outcome." Woody: "I have been meaning to ask you why do they call you Bug?" Bug: "Because I like insects. Why do they call you Woody?" Woody: "Why are you here again?" Woody: [Woody begins to undress and change his clothes] Bug: "You obviously didn't make it to the sexual harassment seminar." Woody: "Sure I did. That's why I didn't ask if you wanted to wrestle." Woody: "Any way to tell her age from the autopsy?" Bug: "Sure, I'll just cut her open and count the rings." Woody: "You could have simply said no." [a woman is running a brothel under the disguise of a modeling agency] Madam: "You know, we're starting a men's division, Detective Hoyt. In case you're ever interested in making some extra cash..." Woody: "I'll keep that in mind." Bug: "What about me?" Bug: [Bug is having technical difficulties] Woody: "You know, I could always go get Nigel." Bug: "If you love Nigel so much, why don't you marry him?" Woody: "We can actually do that now in Vermont." Woody: "Let's not jump to any hasty conclusions here. If I was looking for the wack-a-doo conspiracy version I would have called Jordan in." Nigel: "I am some how both flattered and insulted by that." Woody: "I'd appreciate if you handle this with a little bit of sensitivity. I don't know if you know this or not, but I'm up for a promotion this year. So if word got out..." Nigel: "Woody, Woody, Woody... I promise that I will keep an open mind, okay? And anyway sensitivity is my middle name." [opens the door] Nigel: [shouts] "Sweet Mary in the manger!" Jordan: "Look... You guys get along. I need you to talk to him." Woody: "He pulled a gun on me!" Jordan: "That's bonding for him. He feels comfortable with you." Woody: "He said he was going to shoot me!" Jordan: "You see... You guys are closer than I thought." Woody: "I have moral issues shooting live animals. I don't care if it is wabbit hunting season." Cal Hoyt: "But you shoot people." Woody: "I shoot bad people." Cal Hoyt: "Well, there's bad wabbit." Nigel: "Not only is my intelligence not dampened by alcohol, I actually get smarter with each drink. By the time I'm pissed drunk, my IQ reaches genius levels."