:roll:... I wrote "Danita" intentionally...

Well, from where to start?...

The younger ones won't understand this pretty well, but, I know exactly who will... ;)

So, my ex... :(

I admitted everything to him, how I cheated on him and did other evil things... :(

I did that because I couldn't hold it in myself anymore, and because I realized that I want him, and that I love him, so, if maybe, one day, we would be together again, I wanted him to know everything... :(

And, what happens next?

Well, let me just tell that cheating wasn't the worst thing I did to him, so you can just imagine the others... :(

So, I cried a bit, I cried a lot, but nothing, (even if I did it just to have effect on him, but, I didn't), could make him to believe me, because this is the 1000000000000000000th time that I do that, cry, and ask for forgiveness... :(

So, he told me he will think about everything, and on me is just to let him go, not to call him and cry over the phone and similar things... :cry:

But, the point is, that all this made me see, that he actually stopped loving me, or at least, stopped loving me like before, and, no, I don't think it happened now, like I said, it made me see that that happened in last 6 months, while we were just "friends", even before I told him this... :(

So, I am pretty scared, I cry a lot, and I am totally f*cked up... :(

But, I knew this will happen... The only thing I was ever afraid, was that I will realize one day that he is actually what I want, and that it will be too late, so I will spend my life with someone irrelevant, or with no one, instead of being with him... :(

Why did I do all those bad things, how could I be so evil constantly, 3 years???

I will never understand that. :(

I am kinda in the mood that I think I would quit everything, my great job, my great career, go back to Smederevo and be with him, only if he would ask so... :(

Like I told once, in some of my old, (older) blogs, all problems I ever had were caused by me, and only me... :(

On the other hand, I found out today, that I will receive big money these days from firm, like late payment for March, and that I will have pretty big payment, much more than I hoped for...

I start to think maybe it is not so good for me living alone... :(

See ya! :cry: