The Wii. The greatest videogame system... No. The greatest THING ever created! Within that small white box are powers incomprehensible, powers that defy the natural order of things. With powers so great instilled inside something so many people are trying to get their hands on, it's no wonder the dark forces of this existence are conspiring to keep this power for themselves and away from those who would use it to do good. In this blog I will outline my shocking and unfathomable adventures in my quest to find a Wii last week, and I will let the world know once and for all how I came to know the true power within for myself.

So I was driving home from picking up food from the grocery store for my mom when I passed that Shopko on 34th. Now, I got a $100 gift card for Shopko from some of my friends awhile ago to help me buy a Wii, so I figured I'd give that Shopko a call since I had their number in my phone. When the girl answered she told me that they'd had some Wiis earlier this morning but they were out now.

This was pretty bad news, since the place opens at 8 and it was only about 9 when I called. I almost gave up right then, but then I saw the other Shopko's number flashing on my phone, right underneath the first one's. It was glowing with some kind of unearthly aura... not necessarily bad... but unnatural. Before I knew what I was doing, my finger had pushed the call button. It was as if I'd lost control of myself, but I didn't care!! I just had to call that number!!

As I raised the phone shakily to my ear, the lady on the other end greeted me.

"Do you have any Wiis in stock?" I asked uncertainly. I knew in my heart that it was impossible... but still, I HAD to ask!

She breathed in sharply. "Wiis?!" I knew something wasn't right. She stayed silent for several moments, until I thought the blood I could hear beating in my eardrums was about to explode. "We have some in stock." She said finally, resolutely. "But there's not much time! They're flying off the shelves. Please sir... you must hurry!"

I sat for nearly a minute, unable to believe what I was hearing. I thought of the food I'd just packed carefully into the back of the car, the food that needed to get to a refrigerator or it would perish. I thought of the immense amount of space between the Wii and me... I could never make it in time. Then I heard the girl's shaky breathing on the other end of the line.

"...Please..." she whispered again. I knew what I had to do.

"Ok." Click. The phone went dead. This was it. My eyes set resolutely forward, I swung the car into a sharp U-turn. Never mind the sound of groceries falling on top of each other in back, I pushed the bus that was heading straight for me on the other side of the road out of my head. Now was the time. I would make it in front of the bus... or die trying!

I swear I could feel my back bumper scrape against the bus's front as my car swung all the way around, now facing away from the bus instead of racing straight toward it. Intense racing music sprang up on my mp3 player as I finished the turn, feeling my right wheels slide up against the curb violently as the car bounced heavily on its suspension. Then I pushed the pedal to the metal and the music cranked itself to maximum volume. It was as if my mp3 player knew what was going on, it knew that this was the time for action!!! Gripping the wheel so hard blood came out... OF THE STEERING WHEEL... my mouth opened into a bloodcurdling scream as I felt fires erupt from the street under my car.

I raced down 34th, my heart pounding audibly. What was I doing?? There was no way I could make it all the way across town before that last Wii was gone!! But then I remembered the lady on the phone's silent plea... I must push on!!!!! My speedometer crept up to 60 as I blew past all the traffic.

Lights changed as I approached them. Green. Green. Green. It was madness! I've never seen anything like it!! I knew then that this was everything or nothing. Wii or death. Nature was bending it's laws for me, I couldn't let it down! Then I saw something on the horizon that spelled certain death. No Wiis for me. The policeman was driving along side a dump truck down the road. Both doing 20 mph, if even that. I was boxed in. There was no way around them. I thought about dodging into oncoming traffic, but even that would have been futile. The entire 34th was a complete traffic jam going the other way, there wasn't a single opening for me to even fit in let alone speed in front of these slow pokes. It was then that I saw the policeman in his rearview mirror. I could see him looking straight at me, his brow furrowed as if angry. No, as if trying to discern something. Then my eyes met his.

He understood.

Police lights flashed and the siren drowned out all other noise. He motioned for me to follow him, then accelerated madly with a wry grin on his face. He knew what was going on. He could feel the gravity of this situation. Either I reached that Shopko or there would be consequences that the world itself couldn't even fathom. We burned rubber down the road, a two-car convoy that wasn't going to be stopped. The siren seemed to mesh musically with the racing song on my mp3 player, and I felt for the first time that I would actually make it. Then my blood curdled and the sun went black.

It was that bus... The same bus from before!! The one I had turned in front of!! How it got in front of me I'll never know. I don't WANT to know. But there it was, heading straight for us on the wrong side of the road. The policeman saw it. I saw it. We both glanced at each other, worried, confused. I glanced back at the bus, and that's when it clicked. I knew now. The bus number was gleaming maniacally on the front, above the window. Flashing in dark red fury. This was bus number 666. There was no escape for us.

The policeman saw too, and I could almost hear him curse. He wouldn't make it, and neither would I. The bus barreling down the road towards us, tearing the asphalt apart behind it, spelled certain doom for anyone on this road, and it would NOT allow me to finish my quest for a Wii. Not today, not ever. I was desperate. I had no idea what to do. The bus was bearing down on us, my heart beat dead in my chest. I had failed. Then I saw the policeman again, his face twisted in rage and resolution. He turned and gave me one, single nod.

"...No." I mouthed to him. But it was too late. He pushed his car to the limit; I swear he hit 170 mph within seconds. Suddenly he pulled an extra key out of his pocket and slammed it down into some kind of extra keyhole in the door off to his left and turned it. The car's suspension lowered and it's spoiler retracted, it was then that I let my breath out for the first time since I'd seen that bus. The maniac was driving a freaking Bugatti Veyron!!! That's the fastest car in the world; it can hit 255 mph without even shaking. He pulled the shotgun from the right side of the car and aimed it square in the bus driver's face. I never saw what happened after that, I had to keep going, but I know I heard the bus driver slowly and in a low voice state "Not even death will save you from me." and then the policeman's retort, "Yours will!!!!!" and then nothing but explosions and fire. I held back the tears, that policeman had been the greatest officer who ever lived. I swore I wouldn't let his sacrifice be in vain!!!

Pulling haphazardly into the Shopko parking lot, I slammed the car into park and jumped from my seat. I may have even left the door open, I have no idea. All I knew was that I had to get into that building!! I pushed the doors open, breathless, and sprinted madly to the service counter. The girl at the desk saw me. Her eyes went from hopeless and defeated to full of life.

"It's... really you..." She gaped.

"Yes." I smiled. "It's me."

She laughed. "I thought you'd never make it! I'll be right back with what you want." I collapsed against the desk. It was all over; I'd made it in time. She had gone to get my Wii and now I didn't have to worry anymore. At least, that's what I thought. How wrong I was.

Hell literally broke loose through the front doors of Shopko at that moment. I could feel the presence once again, that heart stopping blackness that meant only one thing... Bus 666 was back.

The girl screamed from the back and I heard her drop her keys.

"NO!!!" I shouted, turning to the entrance to face that evil bus of condemned souls. She scrambled around back there, pushing the keys into something, but I didn't have much hope left. There was no way. I could see the devil himself at the head of the bus, snarling as he pushed it towards me. I was as good as dead.

Then I heard one word from the girl, "CATCH!!!" I turned, grabbed the Wii out of the air, threw her my gift card and credit card, and held the Wii up to the forces of darkness. Then it engulfed me and I felt its true power. That soul crushing power, I'll never forget it. I thought I was dead during those few moments. I would have been too, if it hadn't been for the light I could feel pulsing in my hands. I heard a scream. My own? I didn't think so. It was darker. Not my voice at all.

Then the darkness lifted and through the flaming remains of the bus I could see the devil staring at me. "Your time is up!" He reached one, clawed hand and grasped my throat.

"How??" I gasped. "I... had the wii..."

"It's not yours unless you've paid for it!" Satan snarled back, squeezing harder. "No human could wield that awesome power unless it truly belonged to them!!!"

"It's his now!" It was a girl's voice. I recognized it, but everything was going black. Then I saw two words flashing on the cash register display. "Card Approved". THAT WAS IT!!!! Power flowed through me as I ripped free of the devil's grasp! Reaching down for the box, I tore through it and embraced the Wii within, wielding the controller like a sword.

"NOT POSSIBLE!!!!!" the devil screeched, but it was too late. The power of the Wii overwhelmed him and soon he was nothing more. Just a lost fragment of evil that had failed in the face of true power.

Then I saw the policeman behind him. He gave me the thumbs up and I returned the favor.

"You truly earned that Wii." I saw him mouth the words more than heard them, and then he turned silently to walk out the smoldering hole where the doors used to be. I never saw him again.

And then I had to go to school!!!! The thing was at our house all day and I hadn't even plugged it in yet!!! AAAARRRGHH!!!!! I wanted to go home and play it so much!!!!!!

But then eventually I did get to go home and plug it in, slip a game seamlessly into the CD slot in the side, and have the most fun I've ever had in my life. I'm serious here, you have no idea just how fun the Wii is unless you've played one. Ever since that moment I have been able to feel the power of the Wii flowing through me constantly, and unless you too have a Wii for yourself, this is a feeling that you cannot possibly imagine. Also I totally got Super Smash Bros Brawl the other day!! That's an awesome game!!! Ok, that's all for now. Bye!

Ok, so I was at Gamers (videogame store, kinda like gamestop) today and in the 'used DS' section I found a DS Web Browser! How insane is that?!? Ok, so it wasn't quite as insane as I thought it was, when I first saw it I thought it was the American version and I was like "Geez, I had no IDEA that this had come out yet!!" but then I bought it and took it home, and it looks like it's just the European version. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it still seems to work just fine, but it totally drained the 'insane' factor right out of it.

Either way I'm happy to have it, but I can't really use it. My computer doesn't have wireless internet or anything. To look on the bright side, this will force me to carry my DS lite around more and look for hot spots like someone with divining rods looking for a hot spring! (Ok, so that may not be a good thing, in fact I'll look totally crazy, but I WILL have fun!)

Well, that's about it for now. Sorry about the misleading blog title, but to be fair I really thought it was Total INSANITY when I first bought the thing. It only cost $24.95 too, so overall I'm pretty happy.

Anyway, I know that this is nowhere near as fun and exciting as my first blog post, but please leave comments anyway. Feel free to give me ideas on what to post my blogs about too, but if no one gives me anything to work with I may end up just filling my blog with random short stories.

I'll see ya later everyone!

Yup, hate em with a firey passion that consumes my being at the simplest thought. The name itself is where it starts, the word "blog" makes no sense, and just the construction of this word and how it sounds as it rolls off my tongue infuriorates me to a degree that you don't even want to comprehend.

Secondly, there is the content of most blogs. It can range from juvinile and simple idiocy to something actually decent and almost professional. This is just annoying because I can't come to rely on blogs for information of any kind due to all the bad ones, but when there is a good one I tend to not even care enough to check it out, let alone have the fortune to find it among all the literary sewage that surrounds it.

Thirdly, who in the world possibly has the time to make all these? I really can't think of a time when I could fit this into my day when I couldn't be doing something both more fun AND more educational! And while this is a combonation I absolutely loathe, I would still chose it over the act of creating and maintaining any manner of blog!

Fourthly, why would anyone friggin' care what some random moron has to say about an even more random subject, especially when compounded by this moron's lack of spelling skills and/or a real life if this moron has the time to waste making a blog? It can't be the other random morons who care, because they're all off making their own blogs, so who is it?!? I honestly have no freakin' idea who reads these!

Fifthly, if the person does, by some miracle, have the time to make one of these and actually can think of nothing better that they could possibly be doing with their life, then why can't they find the time to spell their simple words right? If they really think that they are so important that someone will actually want to read the rubbish they're pumping out, than how can they not have the decency to just spell their words right!?

AAAHHHHHHHHRRRGGGGGGHG!!! I really REALLY hate blogs!!!!

And you know what I hate most of all about blogs? The sixth... and final point of disgust that causes my bowels to force their way back out of my intestines and into my stomach just so that I can have something to puke out in a hopeless effort to express my inexpressable revulsion toward the simple, undeniably menial, tedious, and uneeded existance of these "logs" of "b", it is.... the fact that I have just written one. I'm gonna go puke now.

Ciao! have a fun day!