Yes. Yes, I know. You're all probably going to, or possibly even have, made plans to shoot me. Well, most of you, anyways.

However, in America, every man and woman is entitled to his or her opinion. So, without further ado, I present the following flaws with the game that, for some reason or another, slipped by without notice.

1. We're still pushing A (or X) repeatedly to run, instead of having a tilt-sensitive joystick. What is that garbage?! It's archaic, that's what it is. And as much as I like old-school games, this is not an old-school game.

2. Repetitive. This problem popped up in San Andreas, as well. Now, this problem pops up in just about any game, and I could get by without mentioning it, but eh. It's worth mentioning. Any game eventually gets repetitive. That's why we eventually stop playing them. It's just that the missions get repetitive faster. 'Course, that's why the missions are not strictly linear, and also why you can just go steal cars. Which leads me to my next flaw:

3. Possibly too much content/clutter. It's way too easy to steal a car and just drive off and forget about the missions. And then the number of characters who enter the plot makes it difficult at times to keep track of what's going on.

4. Driving. As if San Andreas wasn't weird enough, they've turned the driving physics into a mess. A tangled mess. Of lies and deception. Mostly lies....Somehow, simultaneously, they also improved the ragdoll physics. Niko. Eating cement. Now there's a game.

5. WHAT HAPPENED TO BEING ABLE TO BECOMING A FATTY?! I miss being able to become a food balloon. Also, I miss the fighter jet.

6. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO BEING ABLE TO BECOME A FATTY?! No, like for serious! I would walk around and be all like, "MWAHAHAHA, LOOK AT ME, I'M THE HUMAN BLOB!" Where has all the decency gone?! I'll tell you where: wherever they put the "become a fatty" setting. That's where you'll find it.

As to why it got a 10 instead of a more deserving 9.5 or even 9.7 is simple: hype.

And now, for something completely different. But entirely related:

WHY SUBJECT MATTER IS NOT A FLAW.

If subject matter were a flaw, then why isn't Hollywood being sued for movies that feature drunk driving? Or guns? Or bank robberies? Think about it. Hollywood has been doing it for years, with almost the same subject matter. It's a little obvious when you look at it, but take the parallels between Saw and Manhunt.

In saw, a group of people struggle against a psycho to escape confinement. The psycho manages to turn the captives against each other through sly talking and crazy situations, and manages to get them to kill each other in gruesome ways with bizzare weaponry. In Manhunt, you are a single man. You are the puppet to a snuff film director (arguably psychopath). You manage to escape the death sentence, and now you must brutally mutilate people to death with whatever you can find on your way to freedom.

Yet another big parallel is between GTAIV and The Godfather. In GTAIV, as an immigrant to Liberty City (and a veteran), Niko is looking to create a new life for himself. He soon becomes entangled in a life of crime. Crime ensues. He rises through the ranks of various gangs and whatnot. In the Godfather, Michael Corleone, a veteran of World War II, is looking to create a new life for himself. He soon becomes entangled in a life of crime. Crime ensues. He rises throught he ranks to become the new Don.

While controversial subject matter has always been a major issue with just about anything, it has always been an even more major issue when it comes to video games. Hell, GTAIV doesn't even glorify crime at all....

I take that back. It's late. What am I saying?! Of course GTAIV glorifies crime. Granted, people will ask why the hell do people glorify crime (or criminals)? It's the same reason we glorify Han Solo. Because those people seem to be bigger-than-life. Because they seem like they can get away with just about anything. Because in a way, it's kinda cool to pretend that you're them for a while without going out and robbing a bank. And not robbing banks is healthy for you.

An opinion is only ever worth two cents. And sometimes it's worth even less.

Keep in mind: I don't own GTAIV, nor do I intend to. However, I have played a friend's copy.

DAMN IT ALL! DAMN IT ALL TO HELL!

GAMESPOT, FIX YOUR DAMN HYPERLINK SYSTEM IN (edited out TEH) YOUR BLOGS!!!!!*

>_

edit: Oh, great. More bugs. I thought the blog function wasn't gonna SUCK ASS. What, should I use the arcaic "post the entire URL" method? And what the hell?! Why, if the editor is a WYSIWYG form, is my annoyed face coming out as HALF AN ANNOYED FACE?!

IF I COULD ONLY GET MY HANDS ON YOUR SCRAWNY NECKS, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'D DO FOR UNLEASHING THIS PAIN AND MISERY UPON ME!!!!!!!**

*AND GIVE ME SOME FORM OF CROSSING OUT MY EDITS! YOU BASTARDS!

**the author, of course, doesn't mean this threat. entirely.

So first blog post. Yay. Woo.

So anyways, who hasn't played Pac-Man? I feel right now that I must point out that at the time of my writing this, there are twenty reviews of the classic arcade booth, and there's only one score that is below an 8.7. And I feel it necessary to point out that his review was of an....online....version. Either the article writer was mistaken to think that arcade booths are somehow linked up to the internet (which isn't true at all), or he played the Xbox Live version and then reviewed the wrong one. Even then, an opinion is only worth two cents, and sometimes less.*

But I'm just nitpicking, and that stuff I wrote up there will come back to bite me at the end of this post. Even with that score it gets around (or above) a 9.0. And, as the same review points out, "who hasn't played pac-man before?" It pretty much goes without saying that you would be hard pressed to find someone, anyone, who hasn't at least heard of Pac-Man (unless you travel to some country that's really far out there).

But that's not the point of this post. The point of this post is to point out something very very critical about the game that, truthfully, I haven't seen or heard anyone point out: 28 entire years of video games later (with the exception of possibly pong), there really isn't anything that's come remotely close to having as....complex of an AI as Pac-Man.

Let me start with this: imagine a video game. Possibly one of the best games out there. Graphics are beautiful, everything is cold and calculated, infinite customizability (but not to where it bogs down the experience), perfect frame rates, excellent physics, amazing storyline and character development. Soundtrack is subjective; it allows you to set whatever you want as your soundtrack via the internet: from speed metal to acid jazz, and everything in between. Multiplayer is amazing, online co-op, online multiplayer....you get the idea. Now add in some God-awful AI. What do you have? Half a game. A marred experience. And millions of posts about how the game ended up disappointing.

This description is actually pretty applicable to most games at launch time: promising something amazing, then one thing goes wonky and the rest of the game seems to somewhat crumble down on top of itself.** There are very few games out there; and by very few I MEAN very few; that can claim that after a long, long time they are playable. Far less that can make this claim and say that their AI is up to par with most other games out there.

Pac-Man, as it were, is one of these rare games that can say that its AI is superior. I concede the fact that it's a simple game, but the fact that it has stood out for 28 years, with countless spin-offs, remakes, and fan garbage, is noteworthy.*** And y'know what? The reason it was so successful was (and is) because the AI is so ingenious. In the beginning, it's a cake walk (for the talented among us). Then level 2 rolls around, and you begin to get an eerie feeling. A feeling of being chased; no.....hunted. A feeling that pretty much no game has been able to replicate to this day.

Not to say that it can't be beaten. That takes talent (and time) to pull off. And there are 255 long, long levels to clear before the game pretty much crashes on the 256th level.

Oh, I forgot to mention Ms. Pac-Man and Jr. Pac-Man as well.

*I don't like GTAIV. I'm not buying it. I think all those perfect 10s were either hype or they were rounded up, so you can expect me to post something about it in a future blog post. Again, worth two cents or less because it's total opinion.

**i.e., games become over-hyped. This is exactly what happened to Fable. I was lucky that I didn't hear all the stuff that Molyneaux said about it, so I got to take it as it was.

***The word garbage was used in the most loving, polite, JEALOUS AND ENVIOUS way possible. I WISH I COULD DO SOME OF THE AWESOME STUFF THOSE AWESOME FANS PULL OFF! ....too bad I'm full of FAIL

also, if the links don't work correctly, I'm gonna be severely pissed.