LOL, my apologies. I just finished watching Saw III and I couldn't help but quote Billy the Puppet. :P Have any of you guys ever watched any of the Saw movies? I love them. I've seen I, II, and III. I try not to pick a favorite character, because my favorite character is most movies, TV shows, or anime/mangas dies. And with Saw, that's a high possibility. I almost hate to admit it, but I kinda like Jigsaw. Granted, I would be one of the people kidnapped by Jigsaw, and would probably not survive, depending on what test I was given, but there's still something about him that makes me like him. I also kinda like Amanda, but if I was kidnapped by her, then I would most definitely die. At least you can win Jigsaw's games. If you play by Amanda's rules, you're going to get your ribcage ripped out like Carrie. But the weirdest thing about the Saw movies, is that I can watch the whole thing from beginning to end without having to close my eyes or make a trip to the bathroom to throw up. Like in III when Timothy was put on The Stretcher which was slowly twisting his arms and legs and his bones started popping out and splintering, I could watch it and not even flinch. But anyway, I could tell most of you how to survive if Jigsaw or Amanda kidnaps you. Well, neither of them can kill you now, because they're both dead. But if some maniac in reality decides to go Jigsaw on us, I will post blogs telling you how to survive his "games". Your first lesson begins now.
HOW TO ESCAPE FROM JIGSAW 101
LESSON #1: The Razor Wires
Trap: A bunch of razor wires strung together in the middle of the room. Yo've got two hours to get through the maze, or else the door on the opposite end of the rom will close forever and you will be trapped inside.
How to escape: Pick your way carefully through the barbed wires. DO NOT PANIC! If you panic, you are likely to go nuts, cut yourself, and end up bleeding to death.
Victims: People who cut themselves.
LESSON #2: The Flammable Jelly
Trap: Jigsaw has knocked you out cold, stripped you naked, and dipped you in flammable jelly, which is highly flammable. Duh. Also, there's a slow acting poison in your body.
How to escape: This one is fairly simple, as long as you remain calm and don't get too close to the candles. There's broken glass all over the floor, and a safe. Inside the safe is the antidote to your poison. The combination to the safe is written all over the walls, but the room is dark so you can't read it well. There are candles in the room just underneath the numbers, but of course, you can't get too close to them, or else you'll catch fire and burn to death. Or if you're too much of a wuss to get the number, the poison will kill you.
Victims: Hypocondriacts
LESSON #3: The Jaw Splitter
Trap: There's a metal device in your mouth, hence he name "Jaw Splitter". It'll snap open after time runs out, breaking your jaws wide open. It might not kill you right away, and in that short ammount of time before death, you will be in extreme agony, so I suggest you play by the rules.
How to escape: There will probably be a roommate lying on the floor with a big question mark painted on his stomach. Jigsaw will tell you that he's dead. He's not. There is a knife lying by his body, and you have to cut open his stomach and search for the key he swallowed in under a minute. If you don't... Well, you'd better just do it. Sure, you'll have to kill someone. Yeah, that sux, but you want to live, don't you? Anyway, after you find the key, unlock the metal device on your mouth and you're home free. Only Amanda is known to have survived this test.
Victims: Druggies
Well that's all for today. I'll be back tomorrow with more tips on how to escape from Jigsaw. Catch ya later!