I don't want to believe it, but it turns out when Lucas told me he liked me, it was a cruel, sick, joke that he invented so people would stop saying he liked Alexa. Lucas doesn't love me. Never did. I would never have believed this if it came from someone else's mouth, but it came from his own, which hurt 10 times as much. Did he think I wouldn't be emotionally scarred by this? Well, at least he told me at the end of the day, so I didn't lose it in the middle of school. None of my friends have EVER seen me even get so much as misty eyed. Instead I got home, threw myself on the couch, and cried until no more tears came. My mom called home and I told her I had a terrible headache, and it was partially the truth. I stayed curled up under a blanket on the couch, half asleep, and listened to my parents talk for an hour, and I must've fallen asleep for the other hour. I woke up, went to take a shower, and just sat there like the girl in the picture, letting the water pour over me. I saw my razor just lying so innocently on the shelf next to my soap. Idea! So away I went. Nothing happened, not even a trickle. I don't know how you emo people do it. Fingernails work much better. And before you even BEGIN to comment, I will say this. Don't bad mouth Lucas. No matter how much of a jerk he is, I still love him. Second, don't bad mouth me. I know there are other people in the world who have problems worse than me. I'm emo (sort of), not ignorant! After my shower, Mom demanded I write a thank you not to my god parents for sending me Halloween candy. She just plopped the card in front of me and expected me to write. I didn't know what to say to those people! I mean, sure, they're nice and all, but I haven't seen them in years! The most recent picture they have of me is my 2nd grade schoolpic! So we ended up in an arguement, and that is not something I would start crying over, but with the recent events, I just lost it. Mom was annoyed and said I was acting like a little kid, and I don't blame her. I probably did seem like it. But, we're cool now. When I get Lucas back and we get married and have kids, I swear, I'll NEVER demand that they do anything. Possibly. All I pray is that this blows over.