It was actually the viewing. The funeral is tomorrow at 10 AM, but I'm not going. The viewing was hard enough. I really thought I was all cried out, but I guess I still had some tears left in me. Jordan was the youngest of 7 kids, two brothers and four sisters. The whole family knew a ton of people. And he had 5 middle names. His full name was Jordan Joseph Patrick Allen Arnold Leo Essex. So me and mom waited in line for 2.5 hours just to see the casket, which was opened. When we eventually got up there, there was a slide show with pics of Jordan and his favorite songs playing. When it got to Headstrong by Trapt, a lot of the kids who knew him sang along, because Jordan sang it all the time. Rather badly, might I add. I was already starting to tear up, because Jordan meant more to me than I realized. When we got up to his casket, Danny and Rhonda were standing next to it, and Danny was crying. He looked so much older than the last time I saw him. Jordan was so tan. But he was the kind of out doors kid, so I expected that. They had him dressed in a brown suit and cap, and had a baseball and pictures of the family with him. From his waist down was an American flag. Jordan's dream was to join the Army. I starting crying as I saw him lying there as if he were asleep, only he wasn't. I didn't want to cry, because Danny was already crying, and I didn't want to make him feel worse. My mom hugged him and Rhonda, who hugged me too. Mom was Jordan's 3rd grade teacher. On a table filled with pictures of him, mom found the picture from he had made for his parents for Christmas in 3rd grade. I couldn't stop the tears anymore, and they began to run my mascara and spill down my face. Vincent, a good pal of Jordan's, saw my pain and came over to hug me. I was glad he did. I don't know Vincent very well, just about as well as I knew Jordan. But no one except Mom had hugged me all day, so I was thankful. It was just a hard day. Now, even the sky is crying.