Things You're Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts

1. You're not allowed to sing "We're Off To See The Wizard" when you get sent to Dumbledore's office

2. Seamus Finnigan is NOT after your lucky charms

3. You're not allowed to say "according to the prophecy" after every sentence in Divination Grade

4. You're not allowed to bother Snape, and Dumbledore does not have "nakie time". (See this video to make this one clearer http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0ijNqYlyAA&feature=related)

5. To conquer the Earth with flying monkeys is no an appropriate career choice, even if you're a witch

6. You can't sing Defying Gravity during Quidditch practice

7. Providing Peeves with a case of dung bombs is not allowed

8. You can't tell Nearly Headless Nick that he'd lose his head if it wasn't attatched to him. That is cruel and is punishable by detention with Gilderoy Lockheart.

9. You must not attempt to eat students, even if they are edible.

10. The four houses are NOT the Morons, the Borons, the Smarty Pants, and the Junior Death Eaters

11. Gryffindor courage does not come in bottles labled "Fire Whiskey"

12. The Headmaster's name is Dumbledore, not Lord Hokage

13. You're not allowed to teach the House Elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks

14. Shouting "TO INFINITY AND BEYOND!" was cute the first time you took off on your broom. Now it's just obnoxious

15. Any resemblence between Dementors and Shinigami is onlya coincidence. At no point shouldyou EVER go up to one an ask it for its Death Note

16. When the Death Eaters are attacking Hogwarts and you see the Dark Mark, please do not shout, "TO THE BAT MOBILE, ROBIN!"

17. If astudent falls asleep, that doesn't mean you should take advantage of that and draw the Dark Mark on their arm

18. No matter how creepy and abandoned some of the towers may seem, you will not find Edward Scissorhands in any of them

19. You're not allowed to starts a campaign to rid the world of mimes

20. You're not allowed to flood the Chamber of Secrets, put an organ down there, and play it while wearing a mask and sing "Angel of Music"

21. You're not allowed to start a fifth house called "Sparkleypoo"

22. You're not allowed to tickle a sleeping dragon just to see what happens

23. You're not allowed to come out of your room when visitors from the Ministry of Magic are visiting

24. The giant squid in the lake is not to be reffered to as "Lord Orochimaru", nor are you to sacrifice first years to it on full moons

25. When commiting a crime with a staff member present, you are not to shout "You didn't see anything" and hide behind the wall

26. You will not reffer to the Gryffindors as the "Redcoats" and attack them

27. You will not sweep the floor with Harry Potter's broomstick

28. First years are not toys, and you should not teach the giant squid in the lake to fetch them

29. Making a polyjuice potion of a person, then going up to said person making them believe they're seeing double is not funny

30. Dropping a snitch down Malfoy's pants is not funny, even if it does make him scream like a girl

31. If the thought of a spell makes you giggle for more than 10 seconds, you should assume that you're not allowed to do it

32. Putting fake spiders around Ron Weasley's bed is not funny. Especially if he tries to jump out the window

33. You're not allowed to spike the pumpkin juice

34. You're not allowed to sing "your own personal spy music" when you walk down the halls

35. You're not allowed to reffer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

36. You're not allowed to charm a potato to waltz up and down the aisle with you, even if it's not a produce aisle (Think Veggie Tales)

37. Moaning Myrtle is not Sadako, and it's wrong to tell first years that she is