I sent this to Diamond Dog on May 3rd, I have also posted it on a Fourm and on Myspace, it has gotten good reviews everywhere I posted it. It may be a little "profane" but I just write that way. 2 new ones soon 1 is a thing I wrote in Drama and the other is about the Immigration problems.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
The School Skit
[SCENE]: A day in Algebra Class
Teacher: Okay students what is the Square Root of X Greater Than or Equal to 124 Squared by 4 and Divided by the 1.2303 and Mutliplied by...
Joe: Excuse me but WHO THE **** DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!!!!
All: [speachless]
Teacher: What?!?!
Joe: You are teaching us useless **** that 85f us will never need again IF we graduate.
Teacher: You are a retard just like all of these people.
Joe: Yes and that is why we will never need it
Teacher: Explain this for us so we will understand how stupid you are.
Joe: Its simple mr Douchebager..
Teacher: Its Douchenberger dumb ass.
Joe [Rolls eyes] Whatever..... Anyway you see Kandi there
Kandi: What?!
Joe: Look at her crappy grades in all of her subjects and her..... giant boobs.
Teacher: Your point.
Joe: Proccesss of elemination says she will be a Ho.
Kandi: Hey **** you Joe
Teacher: Please quit cursing you idiots or I will have to give you a time out!
Joe: "Time Out"....... what kind of **** invented that?! More proof that the hippies are ****ing up the country!
Teacher: God.... Continue, Kandi let him speak he wont shut up anyway.
Joe: Alright [looking at Kandi] well you have bad grades and will **** anyone with a wallet so you will be a ho, I can send you a Book called "Velvet Jones': Be a Ho" if you need proof.
Teacher: Please shut up.
Joe: COME ON HER BOOBS STAND OUT LIKE MALCOM X AT A KLAN RALLY!!!!!
Tyrone: You racist little Honkey!
Joe: Proving a point, by the way you would be a pimp.
Tyrone: So.... I cant **** Kandi.
Joe: No, mabye if you pay her extra.
Tyrone: If Douchenbagger wasnt here I would kick your ass.
Joe: So, I'm part Italian and Irish I would kick your ass.
Teacher: Please shut up.
Joe: No, listen this crap youre teaching may be useful for some of us but for the vast majority it will be more useless than Miachel Jackson's **** at the Playboy Mansion.
Teacher: If you dont quit cursing I will give you a Time out and call your parents
Joe: Oh **** you, Ill explain this for you one last time, some people will use this crap but the rest of us will be Strippers, Hookers, Mechanics, Food Monkeys[Fast food worker term... sorry if you work there and are in your 30's], or just Beggers now I'm gonna get the hell out of here.
Teacher: Fine I dont need you corupting these peoples minds anyway, who wants to learn.
All: **** you you bastard!
[everyone kills Mr. Douchenberger]
Narator: And the **** was killed, so the Moral to this story is, you will be a **** up in the real world..... unless youre rich or hot.