7 of 9 to extract wisdom teeth from Micheal Bolton

Jake Sisko
Pictures by Nog
Federation News Service

VOYAGER- Sitting calmly awaiting his turn at Voyager's sickbay, has-been singerand Fabio lookalike, Micheal Bolton waits patiently for a procedure he's been dreading for so long --- Wisdom Tooth extraction. A "painful" procedure in which the patient is sedated at the jaw and the troublesome back wisdom teeth are yanked out(opps did I say yank? I mean extracted) using Borg technology and knowledge. When asked why he waited for long for this procedure, the old codger broke into song (sang to the tune of when a man loves a woman). "When a man's wisdom teeth hurt, he must have them yanked out!" and then started combing his hair. Ex Borg drone 7 of 9 will be the yanker (extractor) under the supervision of VOY's EMH The DOC. The pseudo Borgette explains the procedure. "I posses knowledge of such a thing. It's a an easy operation. The Borg have assimilated cultures with more highly advanced medical techniques than yours -- of course it can be done. An Ocampa tramp like Kes can do it." Everyone else on Voy doesn't seem to share 7's "enthusiasm" on the extraction. In fact, them more curious than anything else. The cranky holodoc wants to take notes on what 7 is about to do. "This should be good... if we can bring a man back to life (referring to Neelix) than we can easily take out someone's wisdom teeth. I bet my hair on it. Oh btw, 7 plz don't insult Kes." Captain Janeway wants to know if Bolton can sing afterwords. "The ship's computers have such good knowledge on this man. I want to know if he can do a private concert for me and Cmdr. Chakotay. That be wonderful. " Helmboy Lt. Tom Paris also shares the same sentiment over Bolton like his captain. "A concert by this old fart would be great. B'elanalikes that kind of stuff." The ships chef person also seems interested in such a thing. "If 7 can bring a person back to life, like she did with me, I bet she'll do a good job taking out Mr. Bolton's wisdom teeth. Maybe afterwords he can do a concert for the ship and maybe a private one for me and Ensign Harry Kim." When asked to comment on the subject, Vulcan Comdr. Tuvok gave me the Vulcan nerve pinch and left me in an airlock. Thefirst time event of wisdom teeth yanking is the first of it's kind on Voyager. They hope to bring back knowledge of Borg dentistry to the Federation and Earth.

pic. time!