my homeboy scott already knows what this is! it's his welcome back gift for being on the enterprise with kirk n his boy spock way to long and now it's time for him to roll on the voyager with capt. janeway n her posse. ;) if your here for the blinky eyes you can leave now, but if your here for the VOY parody, enter mac ale's dodge charger VIP room sponsored by scheafer lite. sassy will be your server (:P) and music by boz scaggs will be playing all nite. beware of the shoe eating ghost...beware of the shoe eating ghost...
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tuvok suddenly woke with a spittling headache and mouth full of drool surround by his counterparts and a few suprise guests. little did mr. tuvok know that he was covered in gel (lubricant) and wearing only his leopard print thong.
tuvok: huh? wtf is doing on here? *groan*
chekotay: well mr. tuvok now that your up, what do you have to say for youself?
tuvok: what do you mean, sir?
chekotay: you know wht i mean cmdr.
*giggles*
tuvok: what's going on and who are these ppl?
chekotay: you mean you don't know?
tuvok: no....
chekotay: these are YOUR holodeck wifes all programmed to look debra wilson from mad tv
tuvok: SAY WHAT? YOU MEAN I NOW HAVE 7 WIFES? BUT I'M ALREADY MARRIED! O___0
chekotay: yes. you some how managed to premantly program these holowoman and the hooters on risa on holodeck 1 and not only that the capt., 7, & kes all have something to tell you.
*holowoman giggle*: hehehehe he's so cute when he's confused hehehehe. breakfast?
janeway: *drooling over tuvoks nekkidness* who knew this guy had a 6-pack...
kes: i'm no longer innocent! :cry:
7: oh plz, you were no longer innocent when you got here?
janeway: oh yea... *drool*
kes: what you trying to imply?
7: your a s****
kes: yea? your made from oven parts!
7: u wish..these are real!
*chekotay lectuing to tuvok in backround while fight between 7 and kes errupts*
kes: real as nelix's toothbrush! he has none, toaster
7: no t!*$
kes: silcone tv body!
janeway: tuvok rub me next *drool*
7: aleast i'm a real blone
kes: real as your chest, PSP
chekotay: blah blah blah blah blah, tuvok
tuvok: huh? blah blah blah
*kes and 7 start mud wrestling in backround*
janeway: i want to pull another liza lampenelii w/tuvok again
chekotay: responsibilty, blah blah blah
holowoman: we love you tuvok! :D
tuvok: ladies..now is not the time! where are my pants? u_u
chekotay: all over the VOY
tuvok: you cant be real
*fight between 7 and kes keeps going in backround*
kes: s***
7: swine
kes: female dog!
7: trollup
kes: blackberry!
7: atleast i dont have to settle for that telaxian and that helm boy wht's his face the one that's married to that klingon. discusting
kes: oh yea! atleast i wasent assilmated at an early age and boob fed bythe borg!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my ppl can asend and live forever!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*ckekotay still lecturing* blah blah blah
holowoman: we can make u some pants! hahahahaha
tuvok: omg wht i have done!
janeway: singing* save it for the morning after, no no, say a prayer for me now..lalalala
7: that's it helm boy telaxian f**** (grabs kes by the hair and throws her at a still lechring chekotay)
kes: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! dam u 7!
chekotay: blah blah blah
tuvok: x_x i dont know what to say...
*kes slams into super boring chekotay* *chekotay falls down*
chekotay: WTF!!!! KES! 7! WTF! my back!!!! :x
7: omg...
kes: uh oh..busted
*janway snaps out of trance*: WTF just happened? girls see me in my ready room!!! *grabs paddle*
kes & 7: sorry!! T_T
chekotay: anyways, tuvok, you must learn the consiquences of your actions. you sent tom and b'ellana's relationship back about a few million yrs, harry kim is confused now after that delta flyer incident, for sum reason i'm now paying child support, neelix and the dr. had all nite emo wrist cutting circle, and dr. is refusing to see patiances b/c he is to depressed to even talk and HE IS A HOLOGRAM!!! the capt. is about to be blessed with a little suprise, 7 dident take her birth control so now we all wondering about her, and i dident know kes had hit puberty!!! :x :x :x
tuvok: omg..i did all those things? but how? i'm just a logical vulcan!
janeway: not anymore. your a terrible vulcan and a poor officer. you were one of the best and now i dont even know wht do with you. just wait till we get back to earth.
harry: how come this holowoman arent turning me on? :cry: omggg
chekotay: let me show what you have done to tom and b'ellana's relationship. *opens door*
tom: owww! owww! b'ellana stop! stop! *on floor covering himself*
b'ellena: i'll teach you to deny our baby! take this! *swaps tom with pain stick*
tom: stop! i never said those things tuvok did!
b'ellena: whtever! take that! take that! pink skin, feo gingo, que nada, wuero naco *whack*
tom: don't forget about the time i fought for your honor, honey. ouch!
b'ellena: LIES!!!!!!! *klingon cussing* this will teach to deny OUR baby...you were there not chekotay
tom: stop! if i die, who will pilot the ship? the dr. is an emo now! *gets kicked in the ribs*
b'ellena: we'll let that blond bimbo 7 do it. she does nothing around here anyways
tom: *spits blood* i fought for your honorrrrrrrr! *swapped with painstick again* think about the baby...she needs a daddy
b'ellena: que nada! *keeps swigging*
tuvok: what have i done! :0
chekotay: told you
b'ellena keeps beating tom klingon s*t*y*l*e because like all klingons she dont like lessening to reason. she eventullay hears the baby crying and runs off.
tom: x_x owwww
chekotay: are you ok, tom?
tom: x_x dad is that you? dad?
ckekotay: close enough. medical emgency outside holodeck 1.
*b'ellena comes back to "protect tom"* rawrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, let him go!!!!
chekotay: he need's help look at this guy. it's kinda funny. hehehehe
b'ellena: rawrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr mine. wait, yea it kinda is...hehehhehe.. rawrrrrrrrr
tom: x_x dad...dad...i'm a good boy. see? i can go warp 10 in no time.
*b'ellena lies down next to tom* awwwwww you look so cute covered in blood tom. :)
tom: i'm a good boy dad x_x
b'ellena starts licking blood from tom's face. b4 long, tom realizes what is going on.
tom: uh oh...O___O nooooooooo...stop i know wht is gonna do next. nooooooo
b'ellena: oh yes.. :twisted:
everyone: hehehehehe.
*b'ellena drags tom away because she wants "some"*
tom: noooooooooooooo... chekotayyyyyyyyyyy, harrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyyy noooooooooooo help me! :cry:
everyone: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. look at those lovers go. :) :)
*dr still cutting himself* 77777777777 :cry: let's do it klingon *s*t*y*l*e 77777
neelix: kes don't assend just yet! :cry: *cuts wrist*
*just then lil neomie wildman walks in*
neomie: HI! :) i found what 7 was lookin for. a tape?
7: >.> no..that's not what i said neomie wildman
noemie: yes you did 7
7: hush now. U MUST COMPLY!
noemie: u told me you wanted me to look for tuvok's camcorder so you can put his tape on youtube. :|
7: >.> no i dident. i meant vacum my room.
noemie: oh..heres the tape anyways...
janeway: play the tape.
*7 plays the tape*
tuvok *wearing chekotay's uniform*: hi i'm tuvok...oh wait..my name is chekotay and i'm at and boring..don't forget i look like mike tyson.hahahah
holoho: ohh tuvok your sooo cute. hehehe
tuvok: it's chekotay tyson now! :twisted:
holoh: let's have a chocolate food fight! hehehe
tuvok: certainly. i'm not wearing my uniform, i'm wearing chekotay's let's get dirtyyyy. kes and 7 to holodeck 1.
*kes & 7 runover*
tuvok: fooddddddddd fightttttttttt!
*drunk tuvok starts a chocolate food fight with his wifes and makes more. the guy is sooo toasted, he starts roaming around the VOY & causing more trouble.*
b'ellena: torres to brigde, we lost main warp power!!
janeway: do something!
*tuvoke takes control of main control* VOY this your suprier, supier, chekotay tuvok tyson! i sooo pwn you. firing phasers!
janeway" oh no you dont! 7 to bridge
kes answers instead: 7 is to busy having fun, so am i! hehehehhe
neelix: reporting to duty, capt.
janeway: try to stop tuvok!
tuvok: the good citizen! *shuts down main controls and starts playing vulcan munk music* then he starts rapping to the music.
everyone: nooooooooooooooo
tuvok takes totall control of ship. playing with the lights, setting temputure to a high setting, bascilly one big disco. he finally gets hungry & sets dolodeck 1 permantly to hooters. after a while tuvok gets tierd and passes out. then the tape ends.
tuvok: i'm so so so sorry everyone. :( i was drunk i dont even rember my name right now. my head hurts soo much right now. wht do i do w/these fake wifes?
harry: i would want one, but i have an interest in neelix instead. ;)
neelix: how ironic, i have an interest in you to, ensign kim. :)
chekotay: omg...u_u
dr: i have a sudden interest in the captain.
tuvok: ok..so wht did 7, the captain, & kes have to say:
those 3 at the same time: WE ARE PREGANT! :)
tuvok: O___O nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. i already owe t'pel tons of child support!
tom: medical emergency! nooooooo b'ellena stop stop!
b'ellena: i want you tom! rawwwrrrrrrrrr. rawrrrrrrrrr
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really old admerial noemie wildman teaching a cla$$ at the academy: ok..cadets, this is why living on the voy was so much fun..everyone was always drunk. except me of course. :)
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ok folks..there you have it. it seems to lagg a bit, you try writing two parodies two days in a row! this is for scott and i hope he liked it. :)