***UPDATE*** As if things weren't bad enough already, this night towards midnight I go to the toilets and what do I know? Can't pee yet again. A man who can't take a piss at night is a sad man for he already knows it's going to be a bad night. So afterwards its a dropplet droppin pee time that started for every 2 hours I'd spend 30 minutes on the seat in the toilets. Results: This morning I woke at 6am instead of the regular 7:30am for work, peeing became a tad bit easier: instead of dropplets it was a thin, small continued pee, still hard to do but is a sign of improvement. What I've realised: last time it happened, it happened right after I had a Monster energy drink. This night, it happened right after I had a Monster energy drink. Is that sh*t toxic or something? Anyway, that's bout it. To top it off, my tarantula Storm woke me up. Yep, a tarantula woke me up. How? Ya know, they actually make sounds sometimes..I mean they don't scream or screech, but when she comes out of her burrow and stuff like that she makes noises from breaking the web and moving dirt around. Wooo :/ Oh yeah and also my body aches all over and my throat is f*ckin killin me when I cough and I don't know why. I guess somewhere sometime I got a cold or something. Or maybe it's all the vomit that got stuck in my throat the other night.

So to make a long story short, I'm single. Yep. There are reasons for me and my girlfriend (now ex-girlfriend) to have ceased the relation and I understand them entirely, but I won't explain it here cause I don't feel like it. It happened wednesday night. So yeah..I find it rather..hard. To me, she is still the one you know, but only time will tell if she is. For now, I just deal with it, try to get over it without being too stupid unlike last night where I got drunk as F*CK. Let me explain this: Thing is, knowing how was a drug addict, I would always push my pain and sorrow away with drugs and alcohol. Now, since I have quit smoking marijuana and I hardly ever drink, it was hard to bear a weight such as this sadness on my shoulders and I ended up getting drunk yesterday. Hella drunk. I got sick all over the place. Anyway, this morning I feel really bad, my head is still spinnin and I feel like I'm going to throw up every now and then, it kinda sucks but I guess I aerned what I deserve for trying to hide the pain and forget it. Everyone knows how it is hard to part ways with a loved one, but I can tell this is probably my first true lucid experience of it.

Oh and don't worry too much, I'm not going insane either. I'll do fine, just need some time. Now I'll go to the toilets.