After fighting Tv.com here, and because I just don't feel like friggin ranting right now, here is the first chapter from the story that I had wrote a while ago - entitled The Journey To Boar's Town. One of the first adventures of the UFICRATT...


One day in the UFICRATT Complex Lieutenant Commander Jackson Harris, a Gray Squirrel from what used to be Scotland was monitoring radio signals coming from the Empire of Humanity. Amidst radio chatter from one battalion to the next something came in that didn’t sound like Empire Troops.
“....working right? Hmmm........(Loud crack of static).....that should about do it. Ah, ...stand by for an important announcement!”
Harris immediately hit the record button on the tape used for recording radio signals. This didn’t sound like the usual Empire radio use.
“Well, it’s not all that important.” The radio signal began. “I just thought you might like to know, anyone who’s listening anyway, that I finally managed to solve the
problem of all those animal mutations. Might also be a defense against the big Death....Hmm...That doesn’t sound right, does it? Maybe I’d better start at the
beginning...
“Long before the Death started I was a young and enthusiastic scien...What? You idiot! I’m Doctor Wilbur Vincent of course, do you think I’ve forgotten? Oh right! I
should tell them, of course. Sorry, let me start over...My name is Doctor Lance Vincent and I started working in bio-chemistry and genetics during the big economic boom of....
Why do you keep interrupting me? Of course I’m getting to the point. I always speak straight to the point. On class evaluations, my students always said....What? Only 40
seconds of air time left? Hurry up? How can I tell about the solution to the mutant problem in only 40 seconds? You incompetent machine, you’ll never get that right!
Here, Let me just......(Crack!)”
Harris immediately triangulated where the signal came from. The machine whirred for a second and came up with the answer of Boston, now called Boar’s Town.
“Too bad we don’t have any satellites.” Harris grumbled to himself. He hit the stop button on the recorder and hit the communications pad to his left.
“Go ahead” came the voice of Vice Admiral Toshi Urhawl.
“Admiral, I think we got something we might want to check out here sir.” Harris reported.
“On my way,” said Urhawl.
Five minutes later a rather flustered looking man, followed by a mutant donkey walk in the doorway to the small, machine filled room. Three steps behind them was a serious looking mutant dog with a shining pistol strapped to his side.
“I hope I didn’t catch you at a bad time, Admiral” Harris said looking at Toshi.
“I was on the phone with President Thana Foxwin. She was babbling on about some strange radio signal that her military hooked onto.” Urhawl replied.
“Was it this one sir?” Harris hit the playback button on the recorder, and the message played.
After listening Toshi stepped back and looked at his two followers. “That’s it, all right” he said. “Robert, can you and Admiral Fourpaw here assemble the troops in the
war room? We’ve been asked by the Cardanian government to investigate this.”
“Yes sir.” Vice Admiral Robert Barstow replies. “Yes sir.” Admiral Derrick Fourpaw seconds. Fourpaw, a mutant dog, short in stature, but big in command, turned around and hit the alert klaxon.
“Attention all personnel. This is Admiral Fourpaw. This is not a drill. Report to the war room in five minutes. I repeat, five minutes. Out” Fourpaw drills out into the comm pad.
“Sir, I got it triangulated down to the Boar’s Town Area.” Harris says.
“Good job Commander. Put it on a hard copy and get it to the war room please.”
Urhawl says to Harris as he walks out the room. “You heard Mr. Fourpaw, Five minutes.”
“Yes, sir.” Harris responds.
Five minutes later, the war room is a bustling place. There is laughter, and voices raised so loud above the clamor that it almost sounds like yelling. The room itself is
styled in the old executive conference rooms with the solid oak, long oval table, and oak chairs with black upholstery on them. The walls are filled with old pictures of a building
with the letters F.B.M.C. on it and pictures, as well as newspaper stories with photos of people that half the modern UFICRATT had never heard of. One end of the room had a
large viewscreen and a slide machine at it. On the same table as the slide machine was also a tape recorder. Lieutenant Paulette Shawncoon was gazing at a picture of various
young agents. All female except for two males. “Boy do I miss those guys” she thought to herself. She was lost in thought when Vice Admirals Toshi Urhawl and Robert Barstow walked in.
“OK people, let’s settle down.” Barstow says loudly.
The group settles down and places themselves in chairs around the table. Toshi clears his throat.
“We have received a transmission coming from the Boar’s town area” Toshi starts.
The door to the war room bursts open and two disheveled soldiers walk in. “Nice of you to join us, Mr. Glomar and Ms. Turkmaude.” Toshi says while staring at them.
Lt. Commander Jim Glomar and Corporal Natalie Turkmaude jump into the nearest seats they could find. Jim steals a look at Paulette and sees her glaring at him in disgust.
“Ms. Shawncoon, settle down please, we have an important situation here.”
Barstow says in her direction. She looks at him as if she’s going to start crying and resumes looking at Toshi.
“Mr. Harris, your hard copy.” Toshi looks at Jackson Harris. Harris turns the
hard copy he had made over. Urhawl picks up the tape recorder on the table and places it
on the conference table. He places the tape in the recorder and hits the play button.
The message that Jackson listened to filled the room. When it was done Toshi hit the stop button and asks “Does anybody know what this means?” Nobody responded.
Admiral Fourpaw raised his hand. Corporal Ginger Gettson raised her hand as well.
“Ms. Gettson,” Toshi looks at her with a nod.
“It means that if the Empire gets their hands on this guy, we can all say good-bye to being alive, basically.” She said.
“Correct,” Toshi responds. “Thank you.”
“We need to find out who this guy is, and what he knows.” Urhawl says sternly towards the group. “Mr. Harris, please tell us where you found out this message was from.” Toshi asks.
Harris stood up and produced some topographical maps of the area. “It appears to have come from within fifty square miles of Boar’s Town, Sir” Harris lights up the
viewer. He places the maps on top of them, and encircles a large area around the Boar’s Town area.
“Is that the best you can do?” Urhawl asks.
“Unfortunately, sir, yes. Without a satellite, this is the best I can get from the Comm Room.”
“Robert, can you go give a call to Samantha Winger at the Freedom Station and
find out if she can get any better?” Toshi asks Barstow.
“I’ll go take care of that right now.” Barstow replies as he walks out of the room.
“Mr. Houdak, what can you tell us what we might be up against?” Toshi asks Unit Commander Jerry Houdak.
“Well sir, the Boar’s Town area is blocked off by the Wolf Barbarians. They don’t seem to care for much anybody else, but their intense hatred of the Empire of
Humanity could be a possible negotiating point. The seem to like us, but since we’re ‘sou-the-ners’ we still don’t rate too high on their A-List. I don’t see them as a potential
problem. They are mainly interested in stopping humans, but I’ve heard and seen them stop mutants as well.”
“OK, good, continue” Toshi says.
“Boar’s town itself is heavily damaged. It took alot of punishment during the big Death. I’ve been there myself and it’s amazing even to me how anything could survive
there. There are radiation fields, and bandits all over the place, in and around Boar’s Town. But the big problem is from, like I had said, The Wolf Barbarians. They are
ruthless and crazed fighters, hence their name. They pillage and loot at the drop of a hat. All of the small communities usually end up paying some sort of homage for their,
ahem,” Houdak clears his throat, “protection, sir.”
“Ms. Fukami, how is the terrain that way?” Toshi turns and asks Corporal Dawn Fukami. Dawn is the second youngest of the UFICRATT, but is one of the sweetest girls
he ever knew. Toshi knows that she has been through alot though. When the FBMC time warped here, and they started exploring and negotiating with countries all around
the world, she had lost alot of her friends in some of those skirmishes. “Jesus, what it must be like to have absolutely no one left to care for you, but yourself,” Toshi had
thought at several times. He had taken it upon himself to care for the young girl almost as if she was his daughter. Toshi himself had never married, and had always thought of
his job and his morals as his mistress. He has himself convinced that he’s too busy for the thought of dating.
“It’s flat terrain if we keep to the west of the mountains.” She said. “As far as foreign countries go, we would go through the Plains of the Free Cattle, end up going through New Kennel, and even have to go through the Empire itself, that is, if we stuck to the ground. I’d seriously suggest flying there, sir.”
“Very well. Your suggestion is noted, Corporal.” Toshi says to her with a slight wink and a hint of a smile. He knows that the mutant porcupine cares very much, but doesn’t let it on that she does.