It is Friday, on the 9th day of July, 2010. The scheduled day of my graduation is the 31st day of July, 2010, after months of reading and preparation for my master's exams. What's wrong?

I still don't have a scheduled date to actually take my exit exams.

As this is an independant study term, I'm not actually living on or near campus right now, but rather an hour away. On my limited income, I can't afford to make the drive every day, so most of my contact with the professors has been via e-mail besides the initial reading list setup. Also, I've been talking to the dean of my particular school, as my previous blog shows. The problem since then is that I was told to talk to my lead reader in order to finalize the date, as in the end it is the teachers, not the dean, who administer the exams (the dean handles graduation stuff though, so it hasn't been a waste). So, per my last conversation with the dean and his secretary, I e-mail my professor on the 1st of July. With it being July 4th weekend, I wasn't expecting an answer right away... problem is that now 8 days have passed, and what reply has there been? About as much as one sees on a blank wall.

Currently I'm at the school, writing this rant, with the library about to close in around 20 minutes. The teacher left early, as did the dean, and all I could do was e-mail the dean's secretary (who was working from home today) and let her know that I'm on a not-insignificant time crunch right now that can throw a rather large wrench into whatever I might be doing this fall. All that I ended up doing today was writing a resume at the career center, which has to be proofread and sent back to me next week to go over again. An unproductive day despite best efforts is about the nicest thing I can say right now, because I'm beyond impatient and am just kinda angry. I've been trying for months now to just schedule a couple of days to take some tests, which is about all that my tuition dollars were being spent for this term, and all I have to show for it are some overdue library books and a runaround.

Right now I just really want to hit something, or maybe sleep outside my professor's office so that he'd have to either walk over me or walk on me to get anything done. There's a time and a place to be angry at oneself for either procrastinating or not paying enough attention, but really, right now the only thing I feel like blaming myself for is being respectful and patient. Apparently those virtues don't get you ahead in life when you try to cross those with assertiveness, as they mistake it for passivity instead. Maybe that's why I'm single, maybe that's why I may not graduate this month. Maybe the time has passed.

Maybe it was all for nothing.