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2 for 1 special...

Here it is...not one, but TWO top 10 lists!

Top 10 irritations as a video game retail employee:

10. Idiot co-workers - Just because we're gamers, we don't have to live the stereotype. So many days I have been embarrassed for my co-workers because they don't know how to act. It's one thing to enjoy a game or to be passionate about a title, but really, the average person wandering in is not going to care exactly how super awesome the latest import rpg is when it's not going to be out for another year in America and they were just in to buy a new controller and Madden '08 for their PS2.

9. ESRB Policy - It's my job to ask you for ID before selling an 'M' rated game. You know the rules already. DON'T ASK ME AGAIN! I won't sell it to you if you are under age!

8. Credit Card ID Policy - It's company policy to check ID on credit cards. Anyone can steal a card and go off shopping. IT'S FOR YOUR OWN PROTECTION!

7. Returns - I'm not the manager. I will do whatever is within my power to take your return, but if it is something I am not allowed to do, don't b**** at me. You don't write my checks.

6. Trade values - I don't decide how much to give you. All I say is if it is resellable or not. It's not my fault if you can't take care of your discs. If you don't like the trade value I offer, don't trade your games. Simple as that. Don't b**** at me. You don't write my checks.

5. Pushed-back release dates - It's not my fault the game you pre-ordered months ago is not out yet. I'm not the publisher. I can't hold a gun to their heads and make them finish it on time. Hell, if I thought it would work, I probably would have tried it by now, but a.) it WON'T work, b.) I'd rather have a later release with more development time for a better game, and c.) I don't have a gun.

4. Quit complaining about the line - most retail stores in the mall only have one register. Some have two. We can only go so fast and we give each and every customer the same courtesy. You will get your turn.

3. Just tell me what you want - don't tell your 4 year old to ask for something when they have shyness issues. I have my own child. I don't need to decipher what your kid is trying to say. I don't bite; I promise! And while I'm at it, don't give your kids the money to hand to me when you could have saved a step and just given it to me yourself. Chances are the kid's going to drop it all over the counter and I'm going to have to go searching for a lost quarter because 'Junior' can't reach up that high.

2. Put it back where you found it - it's such an easy concept. You take a game off the shelf, it leaves a hole. You need to put a game down, put it back in the hole you created. If your unruly child is grabbing things off the shelves, maybe you should either find where they got it or give it to me. I'd rather re-shelve it myself than have you derange my alphabet. And by the way, 'C' is not followed by 'T'. Is it really that hard to get it even CLOSE to the right place?

And the number 1 irritation as a video game retail employee...

Console shortages - It's not my fault a certain game system is not available! Don't get p***ed off at me! Here's an idea: contact the manufacturer of the console you want and let them know you want one and maybe they will make more. In the meantime, don't come off sideways at me for not having it or selling out when we do get some in.

Now, as promised, part 2:

Top 10 irritations as a game store customer:

10. Idiot employees - don't look at me like I'm stupid when you obviously have no clue what's going on.

9. Creepy employees - don't follow me around like I'm your buddy just because we might have had a 'bonding moment' when we agreed that a certain game was purely underrated.

8. A**h*** employees - your opinion is unnecessary unless I ask for it. Your job is to answer my questions and make my visit to your store pleasant; not to p*** me off to where I don't want to come back. This also includes rushing me out the door at exactly 9pm so you can close up exactly on time and go home to play your online game with the people you work with.

7. Persistant employees - I don't need games for a system I don't have. Tell me about your specials and leave me alone. Don't crowd me. Don't touch me. If you look at my girl like that again, I'll break a foot off. Personal space is very important to me and I like for you to be outside of said space. I will let you know if I can use your help.

6. Useless employees - quit standing around like you're working if you aren't going to do so. Don't argue over who's going to get off their ass and help me when I come to the counter. Don't look like I've asked you for the impossible when it's a simple question. You get paid to answer my questions. Don't di*k me around and pretend to look for an answer or for a product. Don't ust tell me "no one has it" unless I ask for a Wii or DS Lite.

5. Price drops - it always seems to happen right after I buy anything...

4. Inappropriate conduct/language - nothing I hate worse than going in to a game store and hearing the employees babbling on about how f'n awesome this was or how f'n stupid that game was. And it's not just the employees...the people that are getting loud at the demo units...were you raised in the wild and don't know any better? Damn, people! Act like you got some smarts!

3. Food, gum, drinks, etc. on the floors, product, counter, and/or demos - there is nothing I hate more than to go to try out a demo on the in-store system and there's something sticky on the controller. I've stepped in gum, found under shelves, and even seen barbecue sauce on game cases. Don't go shopping if you can't wash your hands.

2. Stoner/boozer employees and customers - nothing worse than walking into a store and getting hit with the pungent stench of burnt hemp or overhearing employees talk about how hungover they are (this ties in with the "inappropriate language"). If you're going to smoke up, don't do so right before you go into a store. We can smell it. We KNOW you're high. We don't WANT to smell it because you freakin' STINK! And I don't care how awesome that party was last night and how much you drank...sober up, brush your teeth, and get back to work!

1. Opinionated/Know-it-all employees & customers - I really don't care how "aweful" a game was. Just because you read a review that gave it less-than-perfect ratings doesn't mean I'm going to hate it. If I want to buy Bad Boys 2 for my PS2, that's my problem. If I don't play online, don't keep going on about how awesome Call Of Duty 4 is. Don't tell me what to play because you "know it's awesome". Rather, suggest something that would be like the games I already like, and perhaps mention that I may want to RENT a copy of a game that I've never had any interest in for $6 instead of pushing a copy of it into my hands and insisting that I should BUY it for $60. And for the record, I thought Halo 3 was s***.