Gather around children and friends...it's been a long time since Uncle Will has ranted, and this time it's a doozie. It's not often that I put a deposit on at my local GameStop. I don't because I can't afford to buy a title the day it comes out. I reserve games that I KNOW FOR A FACT will be worth my money regardless of the reviews. Mirror's Edge reminded me again why I wait for the price to go down before buying. I was so hyped about this one...I even played the demo 4 times just because I liked the way it was going. Fourtunate for me, I didn't have the money to pick it up the day it came out. "Why fortunate?" you ask? Because the day I went to pick up Prince Of Persia, they had a used copy of Mirror's Edge. Hmmm...which to pick up? Limited Edition of Prince Of Persia or save $10 buying the used Mirror's Edge? What an ordeal! However, I did not choose wisely (or did I? I'll come back to that...). Mirror's Edge won out being the practical choice at the lower price, and I now see why it was traded already. So here begins my latest rant; "10 minutes with..." (*And for the record, I do spend more than 10 minutes with the game...it's just a title I like to use.*)
Mirror's Edge (PS3) - What a beautiful game! What a beautiful concept! What horrendous gameplay! I think this would be a lot better if you could map out the buttons to your liking. I use the shoulder buttons for weapon switching or firing in my FPS titles. Not for jumping or ducking. And definately not on the L1 and L2 buttons! Hell, it's rare that I ever use those buttons! There are a few different set-ups, but without customizable controls, it feels a bit awkward. And we'll just jump right into the game's responsiveness...those 2 buttons are all you really need to get around with, aside from the control sticks. L1 is the "up" command (i.e. - jump, wall run, climb up) and L2 is the "down" command (crouch, slide) which first of all makes Faith (the main character) sound like a dog, but the game uses those two buttons in context with the environment. If you are running towards a wall, L1 will either have you climb up it or do a wall-run depending on the angle you approach it. Pipes or vent shaft in your path? L2 will have you sliding under them, or crounch and crawl under depending on the speed you travel towards the obstacle. Either way, it's all about the context. And a number of times I got to a ledge that required a wall-run and Faith would jump right off the ledge to her death. 17 times at that one ledge to be exact. The trial-and-error gameplay really takes the fun out of this title. I liked having to explore a bit and find my path across rooftops, but stopping dead in your tracks while cops are gunning you down and having to look around screaming "Where the hell am I supposed to go now?!?!" is not my idea of fun. This happened too many times. And if you should decide to stand and fight said cops, be ready for more frustration. R2 is the "attack" button, where as the R1 button will turn you 180 degrees. Far too often I would bump the R1 button as I was fighting and then get shot in the back. And don't thinkk you can just 180 yourself right back into the fight. No, for some reason there is a delay when you hit R1 until the next time you can hit R1. Frustrations aside, the game is fairly easy and quite short. I had it on "Normal" difficulty and within 12 hours of purchasing the game (including driving time, dinner at a fancy resturaunt, and 5 hours of sleep) I had completed a little more than half of the game with about 15% of the trophies without even trying. I finally had enough of the response issues and screaming at the TV, so I packed it up with the reciept and returned it. Maybe when the price comes down to about $20 I'll grab it up again, but in the meantime, I returned it for...
Resistance 2 (PS3) - Now that's what I'm talking about! Give Faith an Auger and send her across rooftops...that would have made Mirror's Edge a better game! I digress. As of writing this, I have not had an opportunity to play Resistance 2 more than just the public online beta a few weeks ago, but that was enough for me. And add a 2-player co-op story mode...hell yeah! I'm looking forward to dropping this one in later today. I was impressed with the detail and gameplay of the first, and this one looks and plays even better. My one big complaint though...I don't like being limited to 2 weapons. I liked having access to more guns. That's what made Goldeneye 64 better than Halo in my book...well, one of the things, but again I digress.
Legendary (PS3) - Give Faith an Auger and chase her with gigantic Griffons across rooftops! It just keeps getting better! Seriously though, Legendary has seen nothing but horrible reviews. Hell, the game just came out November 4th and it's already been dropped from $60 to $30. I watched this one for a while before it's release and then forgot about it, but then I saw the box in the store last night and figured I'd give it a run. Mythic monsters can't be all bad right? Right. The game surprised me. I went in thinking that it would be absolutely horrible, but it wasn't. It's not the best thing to happen to FPS titles, but it certainly isn't the worst. (Mirror's Edge isn't either...I think Judge Dredd: Dredd vs. Death has taken that spot and firmly planted itself for some time now.) You won't find any outstanding new concepts here...and many will compare the healing process to Bioshock. (You have a glowing left hand that collects energy from fallen monsters to be used as health or a powerful blast. It's not as bad as I just made it sound...it works with the story.) Some have said that it's not very "next-gen" in terms of graphics. I think it's on par with or better looking than The Darkness. But then again, I've only played the first chapter of each, so who knows what the later levels hold. It could be all white rooftops with splashes of color here and there trying to look artsy like Mirror's Edge. Now, see...I shouldn't have said that. That's just unfortunate that I would go and digress and talk bad about Mirror's Edge again. Not to worry Faith, Legendary's main character can't jump for s#!* either.
Wow, this is getting to be long...let's hurry through the rest of my list before I spend all my gaming time today on typing. Here goes...
007: Quantum Of Solace (PS3) - Holy S#!* a new Bond game! And it's fantastic! Now if I could just stop screaming obsceneties at my online opponents and play the main game...
Brothers In Arms: Hell's Highway (PS3) - Bought it on-sale for Black Friday. Haven't touched it yet. Looks like Quantum Of Solice set in WWII so I should love it.
Orange Box (PS3) - Yes, I'm one of 2 people that still hasn't played it. I tried out Half-Life 2 on the 360 and loved it, but I wasn't ready to shell out $60. Once I found it for $20 on the PS3 it was a no-brainer. But now I can't stop playing Quantum Of Solace long enough to try it out.
Kane & Lynch (X360) - Clearance at Target for $7.50 I couldn't pass it up. This game is so bad it's fun. I started the co-op with my wife (which sucks because it's vertical split-screen so you can see absolutely nothing) then my cousin took over for her about 2 chapters in and we laughed our a**es off. How is that possible? The dialogue is so awful that we started making up our own to go along with it. Besides, reviving your buddy with a hypodermic needle to the groin (or other fun locations depending on where and how they happen to be lying) is always good for a juvinile laugh. But it's definately no James Bond...
The Simpsons (PS3) - Like playing the tv show, and just as dull. I wasn't much of a Simpsons fan, but I grabbed it up because it is 2 player co-op. Bad news though, it's vertical split-screen again. It is good as a beautiful platformer though, and show junkies will enjoy the humor, but for the rest it's just mediocre.
Scene It (X360) - So much better than the board game version, and a bit better than the Buzz Hollywood Quiz (PS2), mostly because the announcer isn't as lame. Maybe Buzz was responsible for the gameplay on Mirror's Edge...ZING!
Rayman Raving Rabbids TV Party (Wii) - Bwaaaaah! But seriously, I can't get enough of the Rabbids. I know every game is the same as the first, but they are so stupid it's addictive.
Rock Band/Rock Band 2 (PS3) - We got the Rock Band 2 bundle for the family for the holidays, and grabbed a used copy of Rock Band 1 to have all the available songs without spending a fortune in the online store. The first 10 minutes I spent with RB2? Trying to get the damn thing out of the box and put together. I'll play it later...
Ok, I think that sums up the last 2 months. Lots of games, but no real time to play them. Oh hell...I didn't even mention any handhelds! That'll have to wait until next time.
Cheers!