This story begins in the not so distant past. I had pretty much had my fill of Halo: Reach and decided to pop in my "go to" game, Battlefield Bad Company 2. I then began the 5 mile run in which I begin all of my Bad Company sessions with and was soon joined by the general and darkwing. This of course led to team killing and a plethora of explosive chaos. Our game soon ended and our trio disbanded with great humility.

As I returned to the dashboard, I was greeted with the infamous "blabeep" that is music to this gamer's ear. Alas, this was no achievement, rather a simple notification informing me of a pending friend request. To be perfectly honest, I did not take the time to even see who the request was from. Now in my defense, I can get a number of friend requests after playing in matchmaking, regardless of the game. Now on occasion, this happens merely due to the merit of my gameplay; however, 99% of the time, it is due to my gender. I'm sure most female gamers must endure the same thing, so I take comfort in the fact that I am not the only one burdened by this.

With that being said, I brushed the request off as just another random request from yet another 12 year old gamer who was all excited about having inadvertently played against/aside a girl (who just happens to be old enough to be his mother) on Xbox live. Therefore, I then proceeded to log off of live and went about my day without another thought to this ironically un-random friend request.

The following day, I return to live to see a companion message accompanying the un-random friend request. This of course leads me to investigate further, as now this has escalated his request by fueling my curiosity. I then listen to his polite and to-the-point message. To my amazement he was actually quite articulate and this led me to investigate even further by viewing the "all-telling" xbox live profile. And what was this? There were no "red flags" to be observed. There were no un-clever references to "yo" or "kill" or the ever so popular sensor bypassing profanity. There simply was not anything offensive to be found. Astonishing, I know. Absolutely no sign, what-so-ever, that this random (random is what I call anyone I do not know on xbox live) was a good candidate for the "Do not add list".

After further examination, I discovered that he had an above average gamerscore and a big 5 indicating his years on xbox live.

Now at this point, you may be wondering, "Where the hell is she going with all of this?" Well, this experience has led to a dash of reflection. See, I believe my aforementioned system to be quite flawed and to a certain extent offensive. How in the hell do I know, by merely assessing a gamer profile, if this individual is someone I would have interest in gaming with? Can you really get a good read on a gamer via a few words, gamerscore and years of service on Xbox live?

When I get a friend request on Xbox Live, the first thing that pops out at me is the gamerscore. The bigger the better..right? (Just like a woman…eh?) Why the hell do I associate "real gamers" (whatever that is) with high gamerscore? (And to be fair, I do believe that anything over 10,000 indicates someone that plays games more than occasionally.)

In any case, I did accept EJ's friend request and have been quite pleased in that decision and truth be told, all the randoms I have added to my list, through my albeit flawed system, have panned out quite well. Actually, Cave was my very first random to add to my list and he and I are an unstoppable force to be reckoned with to this day. Regardless, I believe I need a new system that isn't bias. I do not want to be unfair and fully want to be an EOG. (Equal opportunity gamer.)

There is a lot to be desired with any online community so how do we know who to add and who not to add? Must we rely on instinct, stereotypes and logic?

At the end of the day, I feel bad. I feel as if I have wronged many a gamer due to my stereotypical views and standards (as mentioned above) and I am merely seeking a little redemption by dedicating this blog to the gamers I may have inadvertently stamped "FAIL" on their Xbox live profiles. My bad!