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Neko's Offbeat News: Volume 9

Feeling bored right now? So was Neko. . . so Neko says it's time for yet another edition of. . .

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Neko's

Offbeat News

Clips!

( Volume 9 )

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Ignorance is curable. Stupidity is forever.

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Fishy, Fishy, In The Salon

Here's the latest manicure craze to hit the Washington, D.C. area - using live fish to smooth the skin on your tootsies! The garra rufa fish, also known as the doctor fish, is a species of carp that normally lives in hot water. For a fee of $35 for 15 minutes to $50 for half an hour, customers can soak their feet in an individual tank with about 100 of the little guys, and allow them to snack off any dead skin.

The treatment has been pretty popular, says John Ho, co-owner of Yvonne's Hair And Nails. Over the last four months, over 5,000 people have taken the plunge. He got the idea while trying to come up with a replacement for pedicures that use razors to shave off thick dead skin, as there have been some concerns lately by the state regulators on whether or not razors are sanitary.

He discovered that doctor fish have been used for spa treatments in Turkey and other Asiastic countries, and decided to try them out. "I know people were a little intimidated at first," Ho said. "But I just said, 'Let's give it a shot.' " And as it turned out, quite a few people were, well, hooked on it.

Tracy Roberts, 33, of Rockville, Md., heard about it on a local radio show. She said it was "the best pedicure I ever had" and has spread the word to friends and co-workers. "I'd been an athlete all my life, so I've always had calluses on my feet. This was the first time somebody got rid of my calluses completely," she said.

First time customer KaNin Reese, 32, of Washington, described the tingling sensation created by the toothless fish: "It kind of feels like your foot's asleep," she said.

The fish don't do the job alone. After 15 to 30 minutes in the tank, customers get a standard pedicure, made easier by the soft skin the doctor fish leave behind. The fish only eat the dead skin - because they're toothless, they can't bite into live tissue.

NekoNote: Suddenly, I regret that tuna-fish sandwich I had for lunch.

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Oh, My, God.

SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH: An article from the Associated Press reports that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints has excommunicated one of their church members for publishing a calendar featuring shirtless male Mormon missionaries. The 12 men featured in the calendar stand in modest poses, but without their trademark white shirts, and includes a short biographical sketch of each missionary stating their religious beliefs.

The church's 12-member council of elders in Salt Lake City took the action Sunday against Chad Hardy, of Las Vegas, following a disciplinary meeting between he and local church leaders. Hardy, an entertainment entrepreneur, sold nearly 10,000 copies of "Men on a Mission," he says, in an effort to break stereotypes of Mormons. The 31-year old calendar creator tells the AP that he bears no ill will toward the council of elders. He says church leaders "felt the calendar is inappropriate and not the image that the church wants to have."

NekoNote: But really, how many of you ladies would object to having THAT left on your doorstep for a change?

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The Last Delivery

CRYSTAL LAKE, ILLINOIS: Jeff Hornagold loved being a UPS driver - he'd driven for over twenty years. He loved it so much, as a matter of fact, that when Horngagold passed away this week from lung cancer he was treated to one final ride aboard a UPS truck.

Co-worker Michael McGowan agreed to transport Hornagold's body from Davenport Family Funeral Home to Saturday's funeral services in his UPS truck. McGowan also stated his intent to carry a picture of the deceased in the truck with him until he retires, so the pair could keep riding together.

Judy Hornagold, wife of the deceased, described her late husband as "the happiest UPS man alive" and said the ride was a perfect last tribute.

NekoNote: I bet he would have gotten there faster with FedEx.

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When Fashion Goes Down The Toilet

NEW YORK, NY: Visitors to Ripley's Believe It Or Not! Museum at Times Square were recently treated to an exhibit featuring six gorgeous wedding gowns. . . created entirely out of toilet paper.

The national contest is celebrating its fourth year running. Competitors design a dress using only toilet tissue, glue, and tape in order to compete for a grand prize of $1,000 in the form of a gift card. The judges from Ripley's Believe it or Not!, Charmin and Cheap-Chic-Weddings.com crowned this year's winner, Katrina Chalifoux of Rockford, Ill. She spent two weeks creating a sheath dress with a raised flower pattern from molded toilet paper. Interested in giving it a shot yourself? Click here to check out the website, complete with pictures of former winners!

NekoNote: Please, don't squeeze the bride! I think Kleenex may be handling the bridesmaid's ensembles.

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Wascally Wabbit Wescue

MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA: A couple credits their pet rabbit for saving their lives when a fire swept through their home in the early hours of the morning. According to Metropolitan Fire Brigade commander Mick Swift, the husband had returned home from a night shift early Thursday and heard the family pet, named "Rabbit," scratching at the couple's bedroom door half an hour after he had gone to bed. Swift said the husband (whose identity has not been released) discovered a fire in a back room and smoke spreading quickly through the house. He was able to escape the house with his wife unharmed. The blaze caused considerable damage to the house before it was put out by firefighters.

NekoNote: After such an amazing feat, think they'll now consider giving their pet a REAL name?

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Let Your Fingers Do The Arresting

TERRELL, NORTH CAROLINA: After arresting one of two men wanted for a series of break-ins, police were spared the trouble of tracking down the second suspect when he sent a text message to the first one asking if he had been picked up by the law.

Catawba County sheriff's Maj. Coy Reid says that when deputies caught a 16-year-old suspect on Wednesday, they confiscated his cell phone. Soon, a text message arrived asking the teen if he had been caught. The deputies typed "no" in response. After a few more messages, the sender said he would try to pick up his friend, not knowing he was in custody. Deputies waited in an area where several break-ins had occurred. They say they arrested the 17-year-old texter after finding him in a car with three other people. Both teens face several charges, including larceny and breaking and entering.

NekoNote: To jail cell from cell phone - makes sense to me.

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As If Doing Laundry Wasn't Bad Enough....

GORHAM, MAINE: (Houston Chronicle) Mara Ranger will be a little paranoid doing laundry now. When she was removing clothes from the washing machine at her Maine farmhouse Wednesday, the clothes moved. She told WMTW-TV, "I jumped back" and saw a snake. She quickly shut the lid and called for help. Maine Animal Damage Control operator Richard Burton reached into the machine and pulled and pulled — all 8 feet of a reticulated python.

Burton guesses the snake got into Ranger's washing machine through water pipes. The snake's future home will be York Animal Kingdom in York.

Ranger is going to start looking into every corner of her washing machine. She says, "I'm going to be looking in the tub first — before and after, maybe even during, the rinse cycle."

NekoNote: And if it was me, I'd be checking the bathtub too...and the toilet...and the sink....and the garden hose...uurrrggghhh.....

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Bats In The...What?

UNITED KINGDOM: Abbie Hawkins, a Norwich, United Kingdom hotel receptionist, 19, has found a baby bat in her bra. Hawkins originally mistook the bat for her cellphone.

Hawkins said that she got dressed at 7:30 a.m. and arrived for work without noticing anything unusual. When she was driving to work, she felt a slight vibration, but she dismissed that as her mobile phone in her pocket. At around noon, Hawkins felt a strange movement inside her bra, which was hanging on her washing line the previous night.

Hawkins decided to investigate, and pulled out the baby bat, roughly the size of her hand, out of her bra. Commenting later on the baby bat, Hawkins said that "it looked very snug in there and I thought how mean I was for disturbing it." The baby bat was eventually released into the hotel's garden.

Jaime Eastham, of the Bat Conservation Trust, said that she has never heard of a bat being in a bra; however, bats will roost anywhere that looks dark and safe.

NekoNote: Perhaps Bat-Baby mistook it for a utility belt.

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I Think You Fail


ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA: A 59-year-old woman was assaulted at a bus stop by a man who began yelling at her, accusing her of being disrespectful. When the woman pulled out her phone to summon the police, the man threw a blue folder at her and fled the scene. The contents of the folder? His homework for his anger-management cla$$! Justin John Boudin, 27, pleaded guilty Friday to fifth-degree assault in Ramsey County District Court and can expect to face a sentence for time served in jail, at least 120 days, and probation when he is sentenced.

NekoNote: At least give him brownie points for putting his name on his assignment!

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My apologies for this being a short edition, but I'm under a bit of a time crunch these days! (Yes, yes, I hear you...what else is new?) I hope it was enough to bring a smile to your faces, anyway! Don't forget to let me know your favorites, and until next time - take care, darlings!