I'm stressing out pretty hardcore. Its a lot of things work school, interpersonal conflicts that have yet to resolve themselves. So lets start off with work.

I got in some trouble, not entirely my fault. As I received in adquate training and messed up a transaction. I got some scolding but mainly all the harsher measures that were going happen got stopped because hey I got poorly trained. As of right now I just don't feel the same zeal for work, while I never had a zeal for work I most certainly tolerated it more than I do now. Its the same crap day in and day out. I think the main problem is poor economy and slow business. We don't have much work to do there. When I work I want to stay active. I want to earn my money. If i don't feel like i am earning it then I feel weird and these last few days have been pretty bad. Hopefully it will pick up.

Finals are just around the corner and I always freak out during finals. I have a good grasp of all the concepts that I have been presented in all of my classes I just need to finalize some of the topics and get some of the finer detials I feel confident in the fact that I will get A's in both of my classes but along with that I just stress.

As far as me and Kirsten go still nothing. I run into her mom pretty regularly when I volenteer I try to ask questions but she will just change the subject to me. I donno why I don't get it. But iwth that I still have a lack of interest in dating. I just don't see myself with anyone anymore. I look at girls and they are just a girl nothing else. But I guess there is one exception. She is a girl I work with. I do like her and would probably pursue if it wasn't a work person and she has a bf. A road block. So I keep on hoping for things to work out between me and Kirsten to be honest. I figure I have nothing else to go on. If something presents its self I will follow that path but right now this path is just letting me focus on school and work.

Ever since I wrote this I have been thinking of her a lot. As to why? I donno, the odd thing is I haven't been thinking of memories of when we were dating but of when we met. We were high school friends. She saved me in chem class as my partner ditched me. And we got to know each other through that. It seemed we both had crushes on each other in high school but we both were to shy about it. She would always share her gold fish with me at lunch.haha, and I would walk her to class after I got out of GOVt and she got out of calculus. Ah the memories. It really does make me miss her.

I feel better. just writing