Cinco De Mayo is NOT The Fourth of July number 2.

It is May the Fifth.

I swear America is going to be the imperialistic monster of international holidays. It was first St. Patricks Day consuming the Irish THEN Oktoberfest from the Germans.

I wento to hammer down some Dos Equis at Don Pablos and hang out with the girlfriend because she was working on Thursday when I realized

"What are all these freaks doing in my watering hole ?"

Lo and behold I realized it was the anniversary of Puebla and all the annoying frat boys our out finding another reason to get blasted. (As if they need a reason too) Along with the usual balding old guy trying to pick up College Girls.

Out of nowhere I hear some annoying slut say "Woohoo Mexican Independence Day"

That is Sept. 16 you dip Cinco De Mayo commemerates the ultimately futile victory at The Battle of Puebla against the French.


At that point I was fighting the urge to bash her skull open on the floor but that would have been bad form in front of the GF and I didn't want to get on her nerves that week.

I think we should make a list of endangered holidays which are going to be consumed by America and be taken out of the traditional context and be replaced by drunken idiots.

Here we go:

Carnival
Idul Adha
Norouz
Liberazione
Coming-of-Age Day (Japan has the stupidest holidays)
AZNAC Day
Chuseok
Khao Phansa
Zafer Bayrami
Vappu
Qing Ming Jie
Boxing Day
Flemish Community Day
Gergiovoden


STOP HOLIDAY IMPERIALISM NOW !!!!!!!!!