This was a three page script I had to write for Theater Appreciation class.
*A long time ago...approximately 43 minutes ago, a little boy by the name of chuck wun doo was introduced as the new kid of Sakuragaku High School.*
Rose: Who are you?
Chuck Wun Doo: I'm Batman, but honestly I'm the new Indian kid. You can call me Chuck.
*He wasn't liked by anyone…*
Chris: Hey kid, I hear you like getting pushed around by the white man!
Chuck: No, that's my Dad.
*Not even the teachers…*
Chuck: That teacher gave me an F. I bet she be hatin on me cause I'm brown and stuff.
*But that was until one day, when the only friends he ever made, Rose and Chris…*
Chris/Rose: That's us.
*Found out a secret that no one ever saw coming…*
Chuck: I'm Indian.
Rose/Chuck: *gasp*
Chuck: Oh, and I come from a different planet where Lady Gaga is the Queen of the world and I'm cousins with Edward James Olmos.
Chuck: Well, that's a relief.
Rose: Yeah, you almost had us there.
*crappy inspirational music plays*
*Now, he and his friends must go on an adventure*
Rose: There's porcupine urine in this tea!
Chuck: I know where you got that from, Chris.
Chris: Your sister, I know.
*Full of magic…*
Rose: I'm starting to fall in love with you, Chuck Wun Doo.
Chuck: Oh….really?
Rose: Do you love me?
Chuck: Let me check…*checks his facebook profile that says Chuck is "single"* Yes, I do.
*Peril…*
Chuck: I must fight the evil lord Zulu alone!
Rose: You won't make it, Chuck. You'll never make it! Never make it! Never, never, never make it! NEVER make it! Can't you see, you can't make it!
Chuck: I implore you to reconsider.
Rose: Hmm…OK!
*And the widest variety of characters that Hollywood has never seen before…*
Chuck: So let me get this straight…you expect me to believe that Sarah Palin was once a right hand woman *giggles* for a presidential candidate, and that we voted in a black man because he's black?!
Chris: Yeah…
Chuck: Makes sense to me.
*Starring George Clooney, Leonardo Dicaprio and the great Eskimo actor, Jennifer Love Hewitt…*
Chuck: How much is this puppy worth?
Rose: 50,000 yen.
Chuck: That's two dollars, right?
Rose: That's 596 dollars and 49 cents.
Chuck: Wait, why are you going by Japanese currency? Aren't we in New York?
Rose: We're in Chinatown.
Chuck: Then shouldn't we be going by Yuan?
Rose: Your MOM should be going by Yuan!
Chuck: But she's not tired.
*By the way, I'm Darth Vader and I've been narrating this pitiful movie trailer*
Chuck: Hey, cuz!
*This summer…George Clooney is…*
Chuck: GET DOOOOOOOOOOOO—
*The Indian Kid…Directed by Michael Bay, so expect awesome special effects.*