LostWinds spoilers ahead.

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Good? Mmkay. I know it's a short game, but just in case.

Okay, Enril, you may think you're all that, but for a wind spirit, the most powerful and handsome spirits around, you're no big deal. As I've been whipping up cyclones like a Smoothie King blender since you were in air diapers, leave it to Tsug to explain how you fail.

First off, what wind spirit worth their salt needs to martyr themselves to start a tiny tornado? Was that all the power you had? Really? Link's Gale Boomerang could do better, and that thing sucks. No wonder you have to help a fat kid hop and break through barriers a normal-sized meatbag could just squeeze through.

Not only that, but you can't even do that right until you find those shrine thingies. And what's the deal with your gust only being able to lift the fat kid twice? Seriously? Your vortex sucks just as much. You can't break crystal thingies with boulders? You can't kill those leafy bird thingies in one hit? You can't spin the fat kid?

Your Slipstream is alright, but the best thing to use with it is the Jumbrella Cape - The fat kid needs a cape to glide? Where's the wind spirit at?

So maybe you're one of those wise-type wind spirits. Oh wait, I can hear a breeze passing through your head. "We have to go to the Old Mines!" Really? We're IN the Old Mines. "We have to defeat Magmok!" No ****? Help the kid out, for God's sake!

Enril, LostWinds is the place for the wind spirits to shine! You're giving us all a bad name here! Sure, the game would be too easy with say, me, there, but at least I wouldn't be stuck on that stupid boss because your wind powers are so damn incompetent!

I can only hope you improve greatly from here, and that in LostWinds 2, you won't need to use fruit to break a barrier. I swear to God...

-Tsug, the Superior Wind Spirit