My God can beat up YOUR God.
Alright, once again - I find myself completely powerless against the sweet, sweet awesome that calls to me from within a game case. You can't tell really what I've been up to on my 360 since I turned off my internet at home, and my card no longer updates on here, but I assure you, I've been playing the hell out of Lost Odyssey. Anyways, this time, that case belonged to none other than GTAIV. I have not played a GTA game in years. The last one I played and owned was GTAIII for the PC. I liked it, but it was just... okay. Nothing about it stuck out to me though, and other than owning it, and a few blips of imagery across my memory, there's nothing else I remember. I got GTAIV last night, and as I suspected I would, I completely ignored the piles of paperwork spread all over my living room (I'm in the middle of a huge project for work) and played until 3am. I didn't even realize I had been playing for 5 or 6 hours straight. It has been awhile since a game has pulled me in so much that it makes me forget about time completely. That, ladies and gents, to me, is how gaming is SUPPOSED to be. I don't feel I need to do impressions on this game, the reviews both peer and pro I think are spot on in most every aspect. Reading three or four should cover you as for getting a feel for how good this game is for those that like the genre and this series in particular.
Now then, to the purpose of this blog, an anecdote:
I've been attacked and demonized by many religious zealots before.... But this has NEVER happened to me before... my gaming choices are damning me to hellfire, and burning brimstone. I hear things like this all the time... but never witnessed nor been a part of this particular argument. That argument is one we've all heard blasted all over the internet, staining it like so many sheets in a cheap motel.
"GTA IV is the DEVIL."
Granted that isn't exactly what was said to me, but that pretty much sums it up. I'll get more specific in a minute. I found it amusing because I had read several articles and blogs where this very thing is going on, and a lot of it comes from people who wouldn't know how to turn on the gaming console, let alone play the game itself, then of course there's Jack Thompson, but we all know that his credibility even among his peers went out the window some time ago. Some of it comes from, as stated in KellyMae's most recent blog, and incidentally, I find this segment of those whom "know better" to be the worst because of their nature. Gamers. Maybe not hardcore, or professional, or whatever label some of us choose to go with. Personally, I just call myself a gamer. It's my hobby, it's what I do, and thus what I am. KellyMae called this group hypocrites, and there is no better word for them. You cannot tell me not to do something, then turn around and do it yourself. Even worse, when they base it on supposedly superior morals borne from a religious view; to me, that is B.S. of the highest order. Especially when it's followed up by the purchase of the game or one like it that I have just been told NOT to purchase...
The following encounter was not between me and another gamer mind you, but definitely a hypocrite, and a big one. I'll run through a summed up version of what went down, and you can tell me who is bats*** crazy.
Standing in line, I have my copy of GTAIV in hand. In front of me, a lady, looks to be in her late 30's early 40's... in front of her, a kid probably around 19 or 20 making his purchases. It's generally quiet, the store is relatively small and the few customers around me go about their business. I'm thinking quietly to myself my usual thoughts...
"I shouldn't be getting this game yet - I'm never going to get any work done..."
"If I had a monkey - I'd make him learn how to play a banjo."
"This lady is kind of hot. Here's to you Mrs. Robinson.... Yeah I'd hit it. Like the fist of an angry god."
"Did I leave my cell phone in the car? I hope so... it's not in my pants."
"Where the **** are my pants!?"
... and so on in that manner until....
Lady: Excuse me?
Me: Yes?
Lady: You know that game is extremely graphic.
Me: haha, yes - I believe I heard that somewhere.
Lady: and you're still buying it?
Me: Well... yeah. I figure I should just go ahead and desensitize myself now. Get ahead of the rush.
Lady: Have you accepted Jesus as your personal savior?
*** In my head: "Ah, crap - here we go" ***
Me: ........
Lady: This sort of filth will damn you to hell! Only Jesus can save you.
Me: ........
Lady: If you buy it then you're letting the devil into your life.
Me: Ma'am, I don't mean to be rude, but... are you kidding?
Lady: Absolutely not!
*** at this point she has backed me out of line and is now having this discussion in the used Gamecube games section. ***
" hey.. they have Twilight Princess...."
Lady: You have to go to church and pray.
Me: Okay - I am not "of a religion" I don't go to church, I don't pray - this conversation is incredibly awkward.
Lady: So you worship Satan?
Me: NO. I don't 'worship' ANYONE nor ANYTHING. It simply does not appeal to me. I received my morals from my family, and I don't feel the need for faith in something other than myself. I just don't.
Lady: Jesus will always come to you if you ask him.
*** at this point I am looking towards the cashier, my eyes pleading with her for help***
Cashier: Sir, are you ready to check out?
Me: YES.
Lady: I believe I was ahead of you.
Me: Be my guest.... *eyes roll*
Lady: c'mon guys!
*** from NOWHERE - two kids pop out, maybe 8 and 12, or thereabouts, each holding a game. ***
Lady: Give them to the cashier so we can pay and go home.
"yes. Home. Go there. Go there and never leave. Ever."
*** The kids handed their purchases over to the cashier, and I half expected to see GTAIV as one of their choices - it wasn't but man that would have been sweet. ***
They were used games so she had to dig through the drawer to find the discs, while that was going on; I looked to see the titles they had chosen. One was a gamecube game - ChibiRobo, chosen by the younger of the two, and the other was a 360 game - oh, sweet blissful irony, thy name is 'Saint's Row'.
It was one of their generic boxes - so you didn't see the box art, which is kind of dead giveaway for what kind of game it is, and the lady was completely oblivious to the giant poster advertising Saint's Row II right in front of her. The one with the guy all tatt'd up, holding a massive gun in each hand.
I said nothing, and smiled evilly to myself. The girl behind the register caught my eye and help back a giggle herself.
Finally, the lady had paid, they were all done and bagged up, the kids each holding the games that their high and mighty mother didn't bother to get off of her horse to come down and look at what she was getting her pre teen son. Naturally she had to have the final word.
Lady: Remember what I said, and you'll go to heaven. Jesus loves you.
Me: ..... yeah... (ugh.)
So I had a laugh with the clerk, got my game, and came home.
This is a paraphrased version of what happened, mostly just the highlights, there was a lot more talk about Satan using me as a pawn, and how Jesus will show me the proper way to live my life... standard bible thumper speak. Nothing I've not heard a hundred times before.
Anyone who has read my blog for an extended time period knows how I feel about religion. I do not have a problem with people who ARE religious; you are both free and welcome to do whatever you wish with your life, I will never tell someone to change because we don't happen to agree. I don't appreciate those that feel everyone must curb to THEIR belief system, and call everyone else's wrong.
More to the point : Someone else's religious view should never have any effect on what I choose to purchase. ESPECIALLY MY GAMES. Leave them alone, or I will find you. :evil:
In closing, I do have to agree on one point, though my means to this crossroads is a bit more twisted logic than a testament to my moral standards.
GTA IV is, in fact, the DEVIL.
I haven't been the least bit productive since I bought it, and I blame Satan. :P