I have been set upon by HTML, it seems, which has taken to giving itself the name of a military clergy unit. There appears to be some manner of conscious intelligence behind the HTML, although I suppose that it is possible that the HTML itself has developed a sapient capacity for reason.

Although, as concerns that latter observation, I should perhaps avoid being hasty in passing judgement. Reason is not something to which all sapience aspires.

Well I see the esoteric RC blogger is still trying to use the same arguments that other enemies of the Word of God, secular academic liberals, use to undermine the truth of God's Word.

To the best of my knowledge, my beliefs are not particularly secretive or confidential. Either that, or I am misinformed about the nature of confidentiality; I had previously thought and believed that an opinion or doctrine shared by roughly 1,000,000,000 people world-wide did not qualify as a "select few." But surely the HTML has its reasons for telling me this, and perhaps I can ferret out its message of revelation with further analysis.

Although, as I continue to parse this first sentence, I find I am no closer to an understanding. The HTML accuses me of holding views in accordance with those of secular academics, and then left-leaning ones. This comes as news to me, given my published disagreement with just one such secular liberal academic, and with the many disagreements I have had, published and unpublished, with persons of a secular, academic, and/or leftist bent. But perhaps, in its message of revelation, the HTML purports to reveal to me that in fact, this has not been the case. Perhaps, I have instead been agreeing with the likes of Hans Machel, Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, and Sam Harris, and simply have not been aware of this fact.

It is revealing that he uses verses, taken out of context, words, twisted to his interpretation, and the arguments of secular liberal textual critics to constantly attack the Word of God.

I note that the HTML makes, here, an accusation unsupported by solid evidence or examples. Now, it seems to me that in my distant recollection of the first revelations brought to me by the HTML, such a tactic was described as being in the realm of the secular, the liberal, and/or the academic, and most certainly not in the realm of those who seek the truth. So it is curious to see the HTML use the tactic here.

But perhaps I am meant to learn by a more esoteric means? Perhaps I am supposed to observe the ordinance that the HTML is demonstrating in the breach thereof?

It is revealing to watch him use verses, when it suits him in a literal sense, and other verses interpreted allegorically, when it suits his plan of attack on God's truth, to construct an esoteric doctrine that always attacks and demeans the Word of God and those that believe in it.

The HTML seems to know my innermost thoughts, and I am beginning to better understand the nature of it with this latest revelation. Perhaps the HTML is not back-ended by an intelligence (indeed, it is only back-ended by PHP and SQL, if memory serves), but is (as I had earlier suspected) itself an intelligence, and then a cosmic and divine one. Seeing as how it knows my innermost thoughts without ever having met me, I can only conclude that the HTML is some manner of divinity. Could it be otherwise? How can HTML tell a falsehood?

Indeed, the HTML speaks the truth: I do often practice discernment when analyzing verses of Scripture, noting that some seem to be meant in a literal way, and that others seem to be meant in a more figurative way. Or at least, that had been my previous mode of study. But with the manifestation of the divine as HTML revealing this new truth to me, perhaps I need to re-think said mode of study in favour of an alternate hermeneutic.

This is nothing new. The Catholic Church has done this for centuries to keep the blind in bondage to that institution.

The HTML continues to probe the innermost depths of my heart, and its revelation here is profound. Previously, I had thought that my choice to remain Catholic had been my own decision, freely made and based in reasoned analysis of the doctrines of that Church, and how those doctrines stood up against the reality of the world and natural law. But the HTML, knowing my innermost thoughts, knows that subconsciously, I am but a slave who fancies BSDM techniques. And it wants to meet me for a session in which I will play the submissive role, using "institution" as a safe-word.

Or...wait, no, maybe that's not the sort of bondage being referred to. No, no, actually, I don't think it is. I have misread the HTML, and I humbly supplicate and beg the forgiveness of my most holy and divine counsellor for having done so.

If you step back and think about what he consistently does, rather than just focus on one argument, you will see a pattern emerging.

I like patterns.

That pattern is always an attempt to undermine God's Word, Sola Scripture, and anyone who holds to the belief hat the Word of God is truth and supreme.

This is a most confusing and potent revelation that the HTML has made, as it continues to probe the innermost thoughts of my heart, and then with greater clarity than I -- the owner of my heart and the originator of its thoughts -- am capable of doing. Because you see, O Reader, I had previously thought that the Bible, being the Word of God, was in fact the inerrant and inspired Word of God to His people, and that it had been meant to reveal to humanity the nature of God, and of His Son, and of the salvific message and promise of Christ Jesus.

But now I see that this is not the correct understanding, and I am thankful to the most divine and holy HTML-sapience for revealing the true way to my blind eyes, deaf ears, and un-tasting tongue. Now I see that it is not sufficient to believe in the Word of God and its inerrant message of faith and salvation; I see I must believe that it is a solitary and finite testament composed of fixed words, and must abandon the belief that God -- or, rather, what I had formerly known as God, prior to the revelation in glory of the HTML -- had bestowed to humanity a living, vibrant, dynamic Word capable of speaking to us within the context of history and of our day and age. No, the HTML assures me that the word is closed and finite, and that nothing exists outside the Word.

Which is odd, because I do not recall that the HTML itself is mentioned within the Word. But then, surely this is more of my ignorance as a mere human. The HTML cannot lie, after all, and so must be believed and given due authority over the course of my salvation; it is the revelation of divinity and the power behind the cosmos. How else could it know the innermost thoughts of my heart with such clarity?

He uses every method and esoteric tool put forth by the Catholic Church to constantly attack and undermine God's truth and elevate the teachings and traditions of the Roman Catholic Church above the Word of God.

I see that again, my understanding of what is esoteric is incorrect. Previously, as I had noted, I had thought the word to mean secretive, confidential, and had thought that it referred to something known only to a few people in full. But now I see that the term must mean something known to a billion people (give or take a few million), and must refer to something made open and public on the Internet.

The HTML is a wise and most eloquent master. All praise and glory be to the HTML!

The Catholic Church teaches that when the teachings and traditions of the Catholic Church are in conflict with God's revealed Word, which is quite frequently I might add, then the teaching and traditions of the Catholic Church are supreme. They teach that Jesus Christ is bound to accept their proclamations over His Word. If the pope or the magerstium of the Catholic Church has "new revelation" then Jesus is bound to accept that.

Here, the HTML does a most marvelous thing, in that it reverses the very Word it had previously upheld to be truthful, solitary, and fixed! This, to me, affirms the divinity of the HTML-intelligence, because only the very Lord of the Universe could declare that Matthew 18:18 does not, in fact, communicate to humanity the promise of Christ that He would be bound by the agreement of two or three of His faithful.

The HTML also confidently asserts that Catholic faith in this teaching of Christ has been both misplaced and erroneously practiced. And while the HTML provides no substantial evidence for such a claim, how can I dispute the correctness of the HTML's very words, since the HTML has been revealed to me as the divine Lord of all the cosmos?

How convenient. This is no different that what Mohammed did when he put forth the Quran. The Bible warns us about this.

The HTML gives me a yet-greater revelation! Previously, I had not known that Muhammad, the (false!) prophet of Islam, was a valid successor to the hierarchy of the Church by way of apostolic succession. But now, I see that he must have been just such a successor, for the divine wisdom of the HTML implies that this must be the case. How else could there be no difference between the false revelation of Islam and what I had previously thought to be the truthful revelation of the Church?

Jesus Christ confirmed a literal Abam and Eve and all of the Old Testament Scripture as God's Word and truth, which would include the Genesis creation account.

Once again, the HTML demonstrates its power by overriding the very Word it claims is fixed and solitary! Oh HTML, most divine Lord! Truly thou art great beyond compare, and mighty to save!

Previously, I had thought that the Book of Genesis contained two separate accounts of the creation of the world, and that Christ affirmed -- through citation -- both accounts. Of course, I had also previously thought that Christ had affirmed -- through citation -- some of the books of the Apocrypha, but I am evidently incorrect about this as well (this latter revelation has come to me in a dream given by the HTML, and not by any spoken account thereof). Surely, the truth is that Christ has only affirmed the second creation account, and not the first, in which the order of creation is wholly different. And when Christ spoke of how God "made them male and female," when teaching on marriage, He must have simply not been referring to Adam and Eve by name.

It appears that the esoteric is denying that Christ was truthful. That is heresy.

The HTML's revelatory power continues to inspire awe and praise on my part, for now I see that my previously accepted definition of heresy -- which indicates a departure from the beliefs of one's religious denomination -- is incorrect. Demonstrating power to change even the very meaning of words, the HTML reveals its divinity by turning the definition of heresy into meaning the disagreement between oneself and the HTML.

But surely this makes sense, and affirms the godhood of the HTML. For who could be correct when he does not see things at the HTML -- which is already revealed as divine -- does?

Then again, the Catholic church elevates their traditionsand teachings above Scripture and all Catholics are required to conform their beliefs to the teachings of the Church, not Scripture. That is a convenient way to keep people in bondage.

Now I see that the safe word has become "traditionsand," although it would appear that I am still to play the role of the submissive. The HTML wishes to meet me at SteamWorks on Jasper Avenue in Edmonton, my home city.

Oh, wait, no, that's wrong. I have again misunderstood the HTML's meaning, and I beg its divine forgiveness for my error.

Finally, in a parting comment, the esoteric accuses me of being an "effete (feminine) coward" for not allowing comments on my blog. He frequently resorts to this ad hominem tactic.

Here again, I see that the HTML has the power to change the very meaning of words, once again affirming its infallible godhood. I had previously thought that effete meant someone who had lost their fertility, vitality, or strength (traits I assumed must be present in one who seemed afraid of open discussion) -- I see now that the only correct meaning of the word is effeminate. Which seems odd to me, because I had not previously associated infertility, lack of vitality, or lack of strength with the female of the human species. But perhaps this is to be, for me, another revelation by the glorious HTML before me, before whom I can do naught but fall down in supplication.

Surely the HTML does not allow discussion because its words are so infused with perfection and infallibility that all discussion and contrary opinion is both beneath the HTML and impossible on the face of it. O mighty Lord, O HTML, thou art most glorious, and make men speaketh not in thy presence for their error is legion! Of course, this also denies those who agree with the HTML to speak their support for its words, but since the HTML cross-posts its every revelatory outpouring to that which I had previously called the False Witness Union, I suppose it serves much the same purpose. My Lord loves an echo chamber, I see.

I do not allow comments on my blog because I do not want his heresy and vain philosophies and traditions of the Catholic Church cluttering my blog with teaching that are contrary to the Word of God. I prefer to keep my blog free of toxic waste.

Ah, I see I am right. Blessed be the HTML which as guided me to this great truth. Truly, I shall call no lesser thing 'God' if it not be the HTML-intelligence, which presents itself under the name of a military regiment of an oddly dark hue.

His blog performs that storage function quite adequately. Let me assure him that this is not cowardice, it is keeping simply toxic error off my blog.

The HTML shows me the way with its glory and revelation! Previously, I had been keeping comments open, to allow even those who disagree with me to express their opinions openly and in a spirit of debate. But now I see that I should be more narrow and spiteful, and I have only the HTML-sapience to thank for this new course in my ministry of its revelation! Surely all dissenting opinions are toxic and to be stamped out; let there be only silence in the world where the HTML is not speaking!

Well, this has been a wonderful day, and I see that I will need to begin RHIA (Rite of Hypertext Initiation of Adults) post-haste! All hail the HTML and its salvific power! There is no god but the HTML-sapience, and Firefox is its temple!

(I trust the good Reader recognizes the preceding as satire)