This will probably be the shortest blog post I have ever written:

:(

If you are a member of the Pimp Marines, then the Imperium of Man will provide you with a number of Battle Sisters equipped with Flamers in combat.

Notes:

• Initiates don't get any yet.
• One Battle Sister will get awarded for every century of combat.
• Battle Sisters may be used for other purposes than combat support.
• Each and every battlecry of "For the Pimp-Emperor of Man!" will remove one article of armour from your Battle Sisters.
• Two Battle Sisters are awarded for every Chaos Marine killed.
• Ten Battle Sisters are awarded for every Greater Daemon slain.
• Your Battle Sisters are replaced by a squad of male Imperial Guardsmen (wearing the same clothing) as a penalty for any and all failures.
• Successfully completing a campaign from the Gamus Dawn of War II on Primarch difficulty will earn you one hundred Battle Sisters.

Fight for the Pimperium of Man, people!

A Day in the Life of a conservative Yank.

Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. The water is clean and good because some tree-hugging liberal fought for minimum water-quality standards. With his first swallow of water, he takes his daily medication. His medications are safe to take because some stupid commie liberal fought to ensure their safety and that they work as advertised.

All but $10 of his medications are paid for by his employer's medical plan because some liberal union workers fought their employers for paid medical insurance - now Joe gets it too. He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is safe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for laws to regulate the meat packing industry.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient and its amount in the total contents because some crybaby liberal fought for his right to know what he was putting on his body and how much it contained.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for the laws to stop industries from polluting our air. He walks on the government-provided sidewalk to subway station for his government-subsidized ride to work. It saves him considerable money in parking and transportation fees because some fancy-pants liberal fought for affordable public transportation, which gives everyone the opportunity to be a contributor.

Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because some lazy liberal union members fought and died for these working standards. Joe's employer pays these standards because Joe's employer doesn't want his employees to call the union. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get a worker compensation or unemployment check because some stupid liberal didn't think he should lose his home because of his temporary misfortune.

It is noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal wanted to protect Joe's money from unscrupulous bankers who ruined the banking system before the Great Depression. Joe has to pay his Fannie Mae-underwritten mortgage and his below-market federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided that Joe and the government would be better off if he was educated and earned more money over his lifetime. Joe also forgets that his in addition to his federally subsidized student loans, he attended a state funded university.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. His car is among the safest in the world because some America-hating liberal fought for car safety standards to go along with the tax-payer funded roads.

He arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house financed by Farmers' Home Administration because bankers didn't want to make rural loans. The house didn't have electricity until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification. He is happy to see his father, who is now retired. His father lives on Social Security and a union pension because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberal made sure he could take care of himself so Joe wouldn't have to.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on a radio talk show. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are bad and conservatives are good. He doesn't mention that the beloved Republicans have fought against every protection and benefit Joe enjoys throughout his day. Joe agrees: "We don't need those big-government liberals ruining our lives! After all, I'm a self-made man who believes everyone should take care of themselves, just like I have."

bogaty

Link: One goddamn stupid thread

This is mainly for you guys who've been keeping up with my current work in The Writer's Lounge. Known as "The Antropol Project", set in a Universe called "Nevox", it's inspired by 40k and it's combination of sci-fi and fantasy - except that this piece of work focuses more on sci-fi.

At the moment, there's already a written background detailing the basics of the universe. However, it fails to explain a lot of things, like what's happened in general history for the past hundred millennia (The Antropol Project takes place in the 101st Millennium, which would make the human cvilizations there several times older than they are now).

Such as why, despite the (in evolutionary terms) short period of time elapsed between the modern day and the timeline of the Antropol Project, human beings have turned from being 5'9" on average, generally weighing 50-60 kilograms and barely capable of lifting 200kg objects, to monstrously powerful creatures who stand from 11 to 12 feet in height, weigh 8-10 times as much, and are capable of lifting and tossing objects 2 tonnes in weight without requiring augmentation. Alongside their massive physical superiority, Nevox human beings are vastly more powerful mentally - and some are even capable of a form of psionics, which I will explain later.

In a way, I'm still uncertain as to how I'm going to explain this massive genetic difference. I plan to have it written as a "lost chapter in history", so to speak, as these people in the 101st Millennium are definitely ahead of "modern" civilization in terms of biology and science in general, but they are also at a loss of words for why they have "evolved" so much over such a short period of time.

They access something called the "Underfabric" - it's not actually like the Warp or Force or whatever you want to call your "psychic realm" and such. Sure, you can pop lighting out of your hands, sure you can levitate, sure you can throw a car at something if you have a strong enough mind to do it, but it's heavily unexplained to even the most developed civilizations.

Nobody knows what it actually is - despite having widespread technology that can make use of it, their ability to understand the Underfabric is highly limited. They use it in interstellar travel (The average capital ship drive allows you to cross the galaxy and all of it's 1 million light year diameter in one instant), as a form of communications (it's what holds the civilizations together over such massive distances) and for some, in combat.

It's only real definition in the vast libraries of human civilization, having been discovered in the 6th Millennium, is as a "base" for all of existence. It contains "information" or "code" for all of matter, even down to the nuclear level. This "data" shows the position of each piece of matter in the universe, how it interacts with other particles, .etc. etc. Scientists could not explain it; they could barely even "read" and "write" the "language".

Yet, it seems to be a realm of mentality, as well - some "psionics", when they die, appear to "pass into" the Underfabric, in soul form. The only explanation for this by the scientists of the 101st Millennium is that a being that has dedicated enough of itself to being able to naturally use the Underfabric eventually create their own "souls", that manifest in the Underfabric as their physical incarnations die. All life has "souls" - it's just that only the more "powerful" of them stay. The "weaker" ones move on, ready to inhabit new physical bodies, with no memory of their previous stays.

It requires special materials to actually interact with the Underfabric; these are known as "Bridge" substances and there is a certain amount in the minds of all sentient creatures; for the tiniest of lifeforms, there is so little that it barely powers their minds; for the more complex sentient beings, significantly higher proportions are present. Still, even the most complex creatures rarely have enough "Bridge" substances in their minds to "stay" in the Underfabric.

The Human race is one example of the above. The vast majority of human beings have powerful enough souls to "stick around". By the 101st Millennium, where humanity had expanded to all parts of the Milky Way except for its most hidden and remote regions, it was well documented and accepted that they were the only species in the entire galaxy that possessed such abilities.

However, in the Entropl System, psionics took a different path. The inhabitants of the ten-planet solar system, by the 65th Millennium, possessed vastly greater Underfabric abilities than anyone else in the galaxy; their powers mystified and confused authorities for seven millennia; it was only in the 72nd Millennium that it was discovered that the inhabitants of Entropl used vastly more potent "Bridge" substances.

Their material was named "Antropol", after the solar system itself, and the Old Terran Dominion, then a tyranny, began experimentation on all Antropol users. The first real Projects began in the 73rd Millennium; in The Antropol Project, two major characters are inducted into the Projects in the 77th Millennium.

With the collapse of the OTD in the 83rd Millennium, the Projects were put on halt. Their terrible creations were asked to be sealed and locked away forever, before they were even completed. The final stage of the Projects - the programming of all subjects to become utterly subservient to the OTD - was never even started.

A tiny portion of the subjects escaped inprisonment. Out of the original one creations - termed the Antropolitans - there exist a hundred currently running about the galaxy, making themselves involved heavily in its politics. At least two are present in the Antropol Project - which is named after the said experimentation - and they are vital to its plotline.

What became of the Entropl system is what readers should already know - for those who don't know, it has unified, under the banner of an Antropolitan. It now the very force which terrifies the galaxy; its leader out for revenge against the cruelty of the Old Terran Dominion.

Another Antropolitan serves a new civilization of Terra - one that has turned the shadow of the Old Terran Dominion into reconquering faction. Under the guidance of its leaders, it expands through the Milky Way to bring hope to an otherwise hopeless galaxy. Many wonder whether it will become like that of the Tyranny it seeks to replace; those that join believe that its message of democracy and freedom is one to stay.

Those that refuse to join, are ultimately consumd by its military machine - one that was created by the vast power of the industry and sciences of the faction it serves.

Now, it is the 101st Millennium. It is a crucial moment in the Milky Way, for all of humanity - the two greatest active Antropolitans in the Orion Arm, each one serving a different purpose - will ultimately clash. And in a way, they are not hostile, despite their different allegiances.

Read the story to find out why.

Well, I had an assembly at school today. L (most of you probably know him from my previous blog posts) came up to be while I was chatting with my friends after the teachers were done, and it went like this....

L: Hey (me)?

Me: .... why are you crawling on all fours, like an animal?

L: What, (me)? It's true that all humans are animals, but I'm not an animal.

Me: What?

L: I said that humans are animals, but I'm not an animal!

Me: So you're saying that... since humans are animals, and you're not an animal, you're not human?

L: What? No! I'm a human!

Me: But you just said that humans are animals, and if you're not an animal, how can you be human?

L: .........

:|

Read the article here.

Looks like another game to tack on to my 2009 "to get" list. I can't wait, though I'm pretty worried that the fact that Remedy isn't developing this game (*cough* Alan Wait *cough*) and the generally short and badly written singleplayer shooter campaigns this gen may hit the series as well. Still, I expect it not to tarnish my memories of Max Payne 1 and 2, both amazing TPSs.

Why do women wear such impractical "armour"?

Okay, maybe the current question isn't really the best to ask....

The real question should be: What armour?

Here's your answer.

Well, actually, I don't have the game yet.

But.....

Courtesy of True_Gamer.

Alright, I'm back from a 1-week suspension for making a post in SW and sneaking the word "moron" into my post without referring to anyone in particular. Somehow, I was suspended for flaming.... flaming no one in particular. :|

Anyway, I've picked up Warhammer 40, 000: Dawn of War II, started with an offline GFWL account, and I have to say that whoever wrote the review probably didn't even play the game. He said the multiplayer's excellent and the campaign is lacking; from my experiences so far (I've put at least 15 hours into it) it's the other way around. The campaign is absolutely fantastic and the most enjoyable one I've played this gen as far as RTS games go, even topping M2TW. On the other hand, the skirmish isn't so great - there are only 5 maps and they aren't the most well-designed ones I've encountered.

*SPOILERS*

I'm mainly trying to keep the Tyranids off my damn planets, and I've developed a tactic of using Cyrus (Scout Squad), Avitus (Devastator Squad) and Thaddeus (Assault Squad) in tactical encounters against them. Cyrus has a useful snipershot ability that blows away the Tyranid control nodes (the Zoanthropes) and throws them into chaos while I send in the heavy artillery (Avitus) to deploy during the distraction. Thaddeus's assault jump ability is highly useful at killing off the Ripper Swarms and the ranged units that the Tyranids employ behind their melee lines.

Against the Orks, which are the easiest to deal with for me, I use Tarkus. For the most part, the Orks don't have many assassination targets which Cyrus can take out and cause immense damage with, and they have horrid stats and not-nearly-so overwhelming numbers, which means that I pretty much have a field day killing them off and suffering little damage.

The Eldar are by far the most frustrating, though. They may be frail, but their damage values are insane, and they're pretty much the only ones at this stage who can actually knock out my squads repeatedly. The only time when I've ever lost my Force Commander (named Ihsahn, after the lead singer of Emperor), decked out with an Iron Halo and a huge hitpoint count, is against them. Cyrus gets killed within seconds. Tarkus lasts much longer but doesn't cause as much damage as Cyrus can, and Thaddeus is actually the most useful squad I've got because he's actually good at catching the Eldar. Everyone else I've got is too slow for that.

Also, for those who've finished the game already, can anyone tell me why I somehow picked up 4 pieces of "Superior Dreadnought Plating" when I don't even have Thule yet?