I decided to drive to work today because I had a couple errands to run that required me to have the car today. The first being to go to the bank before work and the other was so I could head straight from work to piNoisepop tonight to set up for the show.

I'm not really sure if it was the fact that they were playing Space Oddity by Bowie on the radio or just the fact that I'm stupid at 8 am in the morning; I somehow ended up on a one way street that had a time-space dimensional rift that led straight to the Bay Bridge. It must have been Space Oddity. Weird things happen when I hear that song. I'll talk more about that some other time.

Cruising down the bridge I realized the only way I could go back to the city without paying toll was to take the Treasure Island exit and loop back.

As everybody knows Treasure Island is not a safe place to be in at 8:30 in the morning. This is around the time when the Pirates are all out preparing for a day of pillaging and mayhem, Pirates are especially cranky before breakfast.

I decided to risk the quick u-turn through Treasure Island because I did not have cash for the toll back. (I never got to the bank, remember)

As I drove through the exit, I was thinking to myself “Oh no, the Pirates will feed me to their pet sharks, Oh no, I’m gonna die!” I went as fast as I could through the winding road within the speed limit. (If there’s anything worse than Pirates at 8:30 in the morning, it’s Pirate Traffic Cops!) I drove cautiously down at 30 mph.

Upon entering the Island, I saw 8 massive galleons prepping to set sail. Pirates were everywhere doing their piratey work. I tried to be stealthy, but that’s not very easy when you drive an SUV. One of the Pirates notices me and shouts “Arrrrrrh!” This alerted all the other cranky Pirates, and they all broke out into a collective “Arrrrhh!!!!” as they all started to march towards my Rav.