Well, after being silenced by the man that is Gamespot mods for crimes against the interweb community, I'm back.
Wow I've really realised how much I miss this place. In order to normalise myself, I had to spend the majority of my weekend drinking and laughing at people less fortunate than me. Thank god for oxfam adverts.
As suggested before my silencing, my latest blog will tackle the unsurprisingly done-to-death concept of myspace and it's ilk, and why sites like that are so ****ing **** that they make me throw up in my mouth a little.
Now, we've all seen what happens to people on said sites. They join because a friend recommended it (or because they sent one of those stupid sign up emails to all their msn friends because they were subjected to a frontal labotomy). They make an account, find some relatively respectable pictures of themselves doing day to day things, and begin finding their friends and adding them.
This is where things begin to turn sour...
Because, on their friends pages, they find people with these wackily photoshopped images of the back of their heads. They are slowly introduced to skinny jeans, ridiculous haircuts, make up, studded belts, and a mixture of heartfelt emotional garbage or ridiculously fast heavy growly garbage. This a turning point for many a myspace member...
Which path do they choose? Which of these two choices will influence them utterly for the next couple of years, until they find their own specific identity and decide to take the very rocky path toward deleting their accounts?!
Either choice is a bad as the other. There are no winners on myspace. None.
They begin to add people they don't even recognize in some pathetic way to make themselves feel better that they are popular. They share 'interests' with these people, but only on a superficial level. They begin to take photos of the back of their heads, or with that ridiculous 'powt' that is popular for both guys and gals. They list their sexual preference as bi-sexual because it is relatively cool for 14 year olds to swing both ways.
They find editors so they can completely revamp their profile backgrounds with the latest band/fashion fad. They shuffle their top 8 to include only the coolest people. The more 'friends' they clock up, the more arrogant they become.
Unfortunately, this doesn't stay in webworld. It transfers to real life.
They walk around with an undeserved sense of appreciation. They think they're better than everyone else. They start to ignore people they used to be mates with, just because in webworld, they don't have myspace. Sometimes just because they have less friends, they are cast aside.
It makes me sick.
I have therefore come up with a solution to solve the worlds myspace woes.
1. Shoot people who match the above description in the face.
If we follow this strict set of guidlines, then later generations will be so terrified of joining myspace, it will slowly dissolve, and the latest hideous fad will die. It needs it.
If I could have my wish, then the League of Shadows would be involved. They would use their team of assassins to clean this stagnant mess up. We could all start again, in a perfect utopian society when people aren't so ****ing shallow and insecure.
God I hate Monday mornings...
Theeeeenks