Not really, I'm just really fat.

Well, not really really, I just have a lot of food.

I'm going to be marathoning some stuff over the weekend and I wanted copious amounts of junk food to help me through it. I don't have a short attention span or anything, but either my brain or my hands need to stay active - I need interactivity of some kind. In fact, I sometimes carry a ball of Blu-Tack around with me as a penis substitute. My hands need something to play with!

Anyway, rather than spend the whole time masturbating I decided to make a change to my usual habits and just eat to stay busy, so I went shopping this morning and returned with an absurd amount of food. He's a snapshot:

I don't know how this stacks up with your giant piles of American food, but I think there's quite a lot there! Here's a full rundown from top to bottom:

2x popcorn
4x tin of vegetarian spaghetti bolognese
4x cheese & onion pasties
12x picnic eggs (vegetarian Scotch eggs)
2x falafel & houmous in a soft tortilla wrap sandwich
4x Relentless (energy drink similar to Red Bull, only nicer)
5x pickled onion flavour Monster Munch crisps (potato chips)
5x spicy flavour NikNaks (potato chips)
2x large Cadbury's chocolate bar (to be melted on my alarm clock!!)
8x ripple chocolate bar
5x toffee crisp chocolate bar
1x soft scoop vanilla ice cream
1x strawberry cheesecake

I think chances are good I will be sick in my sleep and choke on my sick and die. But that is a risk I am more than willing to take. I'm also playing with the idea of getting a 12" margherita, but that might be pushing it just a bit too far. The total cost was around £26, which is around $50 I suppose. Just to put it in perspective, my normal food bill is around £11/$22 per week.

But whatever!

Oh, and here is a list of films I recently watched and my thoughts:

Wanted: The whole film tastes like ass, beside the last twenty minutes - which just smell like ass. No substance whatsoever, but no styIe, either. A wasted opportunity. 1/5

The Dark Knight: Great, and Ledger was amazing, but the film as a whole simply doesn't deserve the praise it's getting. There's an absolute ton of awesome characters, all of which are performed magnificently, but the story itself is rather bland and the pacing is absolutely languid. I think it's overly-long for what it is and there are far too many unnecessary scenes - most of which I spent glancing at my watch, wondering when Ledger would be back. Despite flaws, there are too many powerhouse performances from some amazing actors for it to be anything less than great. 4/5

Be Kind Rewind: A little too Hollywoodish compared with Eternal Sunshine and Science of Sleep, but a frequently fun-if-not-funny and occasionally touching film which, if nothing else, will evoke fond memories of childhood and the films we grew up with. Big points for originality. 3/5

Babel: Amazing... just amazing. The stories are engaging, the writing is authentic, the acting standard transcends the concept of acting to the extent that they were people for me, not actors (even Brad Pitt). 5/5