Ok, so i'm making burgers for my office this Friday and i'm calling them Dagwood burgers. No one has heard of them. However, it's to be noted that I do live in a backwater town of about 13 thousand people and it doesn't surprise me that the old fashioned people I work with have not heard of something like this. Now, I looked up recipes of this on the internet and most of them mention putting salami on the burger with the other ingredients but, in my opinion, salami is something more suited to be on a Ritz cracker or a pizza than a burger so i'm going to say **** it to the salami.

Anyway, my point is, here's my reciipe for a damn good Dagwood Burger that any carnivore can enjoy.

Meat:
Hamburger Patty (I prefer meat from cows raised in pastures grazing peacefully on green grass and sweet oats and not on animal byproducts.)
Sliced Ham (Not Canadian Bacon... they're different.
Bacon (Smoked n' yummy.)

Cheese:
American or Cheddar Cheese (Tillamook, only the best)
Pepper Jack (for a kick)

Toppings: *Lettuce *Tomato *Onions (Grilled) *Pickles *And the usual Ketchup, Mustard, Mayo

Bun: Whatever. Some people like to use a big roll or a Ciabatta roll but this isn't ****ing Rachel Ray, i'm just using some Hamburger Buns, alrighty? Toast 'em.

Special: Egg (Fried)

Directions: Cook the food. Stack in this order: Bun -> Egg -> Burger -> Cheese (melted) -> Onions -> Bacon -> Pickles -> Ham -> Tomato -> Lettuce -> Condiments -> Bun.

Consume. Defecate. Sleep.